essay on self confidence and positive thinking

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Positive thinking: Stop negative self-talk to reduce stress

Positive thinking helps with stress management and can even improve your health. Practice overcoming negative self-talk with examples provided.

Is your glass half-empty or half-full? How you answer this age-old question about positive thinking may reflect your outlook on life, your attitude toward yourself, and whether you're optimistic or pessimistic — and it may even affect your health.

Indeed, some studies show that personality traits such as optimism and pessimism can affect many areas of your health and well-being. The positive thinking that usually comes with optimism is a key part of effective stress management. And effective stress management is associated with many health benefits. If you tend to be pessimistic, don't despair — you can learn positive thinking skills.

Understanding positive thinking and self-talk

Positive thinking doesn't mean that you ignore life's less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just means that you approach unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. You think the best is going to happen, not the worst.

Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through your head. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of your self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information or expectations due to preconceived ideas of what may happen.

If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist — someone who practices positive thinking.

The health benefits of positive thinking

Researchers continue to explore the effects of positive thinking and optimism on health. Health benefits that positive thinking may provide include:

• Increased life span
• Lower rates of depression
• Lower levels of distress and pain
• Greater resistance to illnesses
• Better psychological and physical well-being
• Better cardiovascular health and reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease and stroke
• Reduced risk of death from cancer
• Reduced risk of death from respiratory conditions
• Reduced risk of death from infections
• Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress

It's unclear why people who engage in positive thinking experience these health benefits. One theory is that having a positive outlook enables you to cope better with stressful situations, which reduces the harmful health effects of stress on your body.

It's also thought that positive and optimistic people tend to live healthier lifestyles — they get more physical activity, follow a healthier diet, and don't smoke or drink alcohol in excess.

Identifying negative thinking

Not sure if your self-talk is positive or negative? Some common forms of negative self-talk include:

• Filtering. You magnify the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all the positive ones. For example, you had a great day at work. You completed your tasks ahead of time and were complimented for doing a speedy and thorough job. That evening, you focus only on your plan to do even more tasks and forget about the compliments you received.
• Personalizing. When something bad occurs, you automatically blame yourself. For example, you hear that an evening out with friends is canceled, and you assume that the change in plans is because no one wanted to be around you.
• Catastrophizing. You automatically anticipate the worst without facts that the worse will happen. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong, and then you think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.
• Blaming. You try to say someone else is responsible for what happened to you instead of yourself. You avoid being responsible for your thoughts and feelings.
• Saying you "should" do something. You think of all the things you think you should do and blame yourself for not doing them.
• Magnifying. You make a big deal out of minor problems.
• Perfectionism. Keeping impossible standards and trying to be more perfect sets yourself up for failure.
• Polarizing. You see things only as either good or bad. There is no middle ground.

Focusing on positive thinking

You can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking. The process is simple, but it does take time and practice — you're creating a new habit, after all. Following are some ways to think and behave in a more positive and optimistic way:

• Identify areas to change. If you want to become more optimistic and engage in more positive thinking, first identify areas of your life that you usually think negatively about, whether it's work, your daily commute, life changes or a relationship. You can start small by focusing on one area to approach in a more positive way. Think of a positive thought to manage your stress instead of a negative one.
• Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you're thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them.
• Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed.
• Follow a healthy lifestyle. Aim to exercise for about 30 minutes on most days of the week. You can also break it up into 5- or 10-minute chunks of time during the day. Exercise can positively affect mood and reduce stress. Follow a healthy diet to fuel your mind and body. Get enough sleep. And learn techniques to manage stress.
• Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people may increase your stress level and make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways.
• Practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations of what is good about you. Think about things you're thankful for in your life.

Here are some examples of negative self-talk and how you can apply a positive thinking twist to them:

Practicing positive thinking every day

If you tend to have a negative outlook, don't expect to become an optimist overnight. But with practice, eventually your self-talk will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. You may also become less critical of the world around you.

When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you're better able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.

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• Forte AJ, et al. The impact of optimism on cancer-related and postsurgical cancer pain: A systematic review. Journal of Pain and Symptom Management. 2021; doi:10.1016/j.jpainsymman.2021.09.008.
• Rosenfeld AJ. The neuroscience of happiness and well-being. Child and Adolescent Psychiatric Clinics of North America. 2019;28:137.
• Kim ES, et al. Optimism and cause-specific mortality: A prospective cohort study. American Journal of Epidemiology. 2016; doi:10.1093/aje/kww182.
• Amonoo HL, et al. Is optimism a protective factor for cardiovascular disease? Current Cardiology Reports. 2021; doi:10.1007/s11886-021-01590-4.
• Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans. 2nd ed. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. https://health.gov/paguidelines/second-edition. Accessed Oct. 20, 2021.
• Seaward BL. Essentials of Managing Stress. 4th ed. Burlington, Mass.: Jones & Bartlett Learning; 2021.
• Seaward BL. Cognitive restructuring: Reframing. Managing Stress: Principles and Strategies for Health and Well-Being. 8th ed. Burlington, Mass.: Jones & Bartlett Learning; 2018.
• Olpin M, et al. Stress Management for Life. 5th ed. Cengage Learning; 2020.
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• Essay On Self Confidence

Self Confidence Essay

500 words self confidence essay.

Self-confidence is essential in achieving goals and success in your life. A person needs to have self-confidence to achieve success. Self-confidence is something that comes from within. It helps people think freely without any negativity and focus on their goals. A self-confident person has fewer chances of failure. People cannot achieve their goals without self-confidence because they are optimistic, eager, and positive by nature. It is also vital in leading a healthy and happy life. This Essay on Self Confidencewill help students know the importance of self confidence and boost their confidence.

Knowledge is the key to self-confidence. It helps you to understand your capabilities. The power of knowledge can be used to protect yourself from failure. If knowledgeable people surround you, they will support you and even advise you with good ideas and suggestions.

Definition of Self-Confidence

Self-confidence is a term defined to explain people’s state of mind that makes them push boundaries and encourages them to believe in themselves. Self-confidence has the power to motivate people to do things that seemed to be impossible for them. A self-confident person possesses an attitude that nothing is impossible, and they accomplish everything in life. It is important to have strong self-confidence, to avoid failure in life.

The concept of self-confidence is divided into three levels; self-confidence based on feeling, self-confidence based on belief and self-confidence based on knowledge. These three levels are used in different combinations, and a person who lacks these three levels would typically be less confident.

Self-confidence helps a person improve their career, as it is simple for them to follow the rules and regulations of their job. It helps them to achieve success in their life. It also helps to strengthen relationships and work on leadership and communication skills. Overall, we can say that self-confidence is necessary to become independent in life.

The Key to Success

It won’t be wrong to say that self-confidence is the key to success or the initial step towards success. People in workplaces and schools achieve success when they voluntarily take the initiative and come forward actively in life. They even participate actively in the decision-making process, as they feel confident in themselves. If a person is self-confident about himself, he has won half the battle.

People will notice you when you make yourself unique and stand apart from the crowd. Thus, it helps in attaining success in life. A person should believe in himself to gain self-confidence. Self-confidence is necessary if you want to move forward in your career, too. Success comes with lots of perks. For example, you can find your desired job efficiently.

People with less self-confidence are scared of getting criticised and exposed to failure. So, you should work on your self-confidence to get back on your feet and succeed in life.

Importance of Self Confidence

A person with self-confidence can face any kind of challenge in life. They are not scared of hurdles because they are confident that they can handle any situation. On the other hand, some people are afraid of failure, making them under-confident. A person who lacks self-confidence will get scared and leave the task midway.

Self-confidence is considered the first step towards success. In today’s society, people who lack confidence are looked down upon. They are always neglected and left behind in the race of life.

However, many people are famous because of their extraordinary achievements. Success cannot be achieved overnight. It is a long process of hard work, patience and passion towards your desired field.

Conclusion of the Essay on Self Confidence

To live a successful and healthy life, self-confidence is an essential trait. For people who keep themselves calm and compose, everything seems more straightforward. People face challenges at some point, but they remain confident enough to trust their abilities and work accordingly.

A person gains self-confidence with their own experience. No one can bring changes overnight, nor can they be obtained from others. It is a slow and constant process, and we all should participate in it. It takes time, but once you achieve it, nothing can stop you from conquering every height in life. So, to hype up your confidence, always give yourself a pep talk.

From our BYJU’S website, students can also access CBSE Essays related to different topics. It will help students to get good marks in their exams.

Frequently Asked Questions on Self confidence Essay

How to build self-confidence.

One can build self-confidence by setting achievable goals, thinking positively and through constant practice and hard work.

Why is self-confidence important?

Self-confidence helps us to move freely with other people and also improves our communication in the workplace.

How does self-confidence affect success?

People who are confident automatically spread an aura and are more likely to get hikes and promotions.

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Essay On Self Confidence

500 words essay on self confidence.

Self-confidence refers to the state of mind where a person pushes their boundaries and encourages belief within oneself. It is something which comes from self-love. In order to have confidence in yourself, one must love oneself to get freedom from constant doubt. This essay on self confidence will help you learn more about it in detail.

The Key to Success

It won’t be far-fetched to say that self-confidence is the key to success. If not, it is definitely the first step towards success. When a person has self-confidence, they are halfway through their battle.

People in school and workplaces achieve success by taking more initiatives and being more forward and active in life. Moreover, they tend to make better decisions because of having confidence in oneself.

Thus, it makes them stand out of the crowd. When you stand apart, people will definitely notice you. Thus, it increases your chances of attaining success in life. Alternatively, if there is a person who does not trust or believe in himself, it will be tough.

They will find it hard to achieve success because they will be exposed to failure as well as criticism. Thus, without self-confidence, they may not get back on their feet as fast as someone who possesses self-confidence.

In addition to gaining success, one also enjoys a variety of perks as well. For instance, you can find a job more easily. Similarly, you may find the magnitude of a difficult job lesser than it is.

Get the huge list of more than 500 Essay Topics and Ideas

Importance of Self Confidence

Self-confidence allows us to face our failure and own up to it in a positive light. Moreover, it helps us to raise many times. This helps instil a quality in use which ensures we do not give up till we succeed.

Similarly, self-confidence instils optimism in us. People who have self-confidence are not lucky, they are smart. They do not rely on others to achieve success , they rely on their own abilities to do that.

While self-confidence is important, it is also important to not become overconfident. As we know, anything in excess can be bad for us. Similarly, overconfidence is also no exception.

When you become overconfident, you do not acknowledge the criticism. When you don’t do that, you do not work on yourself. Thus, it stops your growth. Overlooking all this will prove to be harmful.

So it is essential to have moderation which can let you attain just the right amount of self-confidence and self-love which will assure you success and happiness in life.

Conclusion of the Essay on Self Confidence

All in all, a person will gain self-confidence from their own personal experience and decision. No one speech or conversation can bring an overnight change. It is a gradual but constant process we must all participate in. It will take time but once you achieve it, nothing can stop you from conquering every height in life.

FAQ on Essay on Self Confidence

Question 1: What is the importance of self-confidence?

Answer 1: Self-confidence allows a person to free themselves from self-doubt and negative thoughts about oneself. When you are more fearless, you will have less  anxiety . This is what self-confidence can offer you. It will also help you take smart risks and get rid of social anxiety.

Question 2: How do you develop self-confidence paragraph?

Answer 2: To develop self-confidence, one must first look at what they have achieved so far. Then, never forget the things you are good at. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses, so focus on your strengths. Set up some goals and get a hobby as well. Give yourself the pep talk to hype up your confidence.

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Building Strong Self-Belief: 16 Tips & Activities

“Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re right.”

This classic quote from automobile magnate Henry Ford is a perfect lead into this piece. The topic is self-confidence and self-belief, two ingredients to a healthy and happy life.

According to Ford, your belief in yourself is a determining factor in your success.

Was he right? Read on to find out!

Before you read on, we thought you might like to download our three Self-Compassion Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will not only help you increase the compassion and kindness you show yourself but will also give you the tools to help your clients, students or employees show more compassion to themselves.

This Article Contains:

What is the meaning of self-confidence and self-belief, the psychology of self-confidence and self-belief, 3 examples of healthy self-belief, 12 tips for building self-confident skills, activities and exercises for developing self-confidence, hypnosis and hypnotherapy, guided meditations to boost self-confidence, motivational speeches and popular ted talks and videos, 19 quotes and affirmations on self-confidence, a take-home message.

Researchers have a tough time agreeing on what, exactly, self-confidence is. Some say it is simply believing in yourself, while others go into more detail about your expectations for and evaluations of yourself and your performance.

For non-academic purposes, however, we have a pretty solid definition; this definition comes from the Psychology Dictionary Online :

“Our self-assurance in trusting our abilities, capacities, and judgments; the belief that we can meet the demands of a task.”

This definition works pretty well for the average person and is easy to understand. To be self-confident is to trust in your own abilities and believe that you can do what you set your mind to.

As you can see from the definition, self-belief is a necessary—but not sufficient—component of self-confidence. You must have at least some self-belief to have self-confidence, but self-belief does not guarantee you self-confidence.

Along with characterizing your beliefs about yourself, self-confidence is a trait that permeates your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Think about a confident person you know; now, think about how you know this person is confident. You cannot get inside their head to know how they feel about themselves, so you base your judgment of their self-confidence on their words and actions.

To be truly self-confident is to exude confidence in your words and actions, in addition to believing in yourself and feeling capable.

Thanks to William James, we learned that self-confidence is an important predictor of success. His formula for self-esteem (a related, but slightly different, construct than self-confidence) proposes that it is built on the foundations of two elements (Nayler, 2010):

• How we feel and what we believe about ourselves (our self-confidence/self-belief)
• How well we actually perform (our successes)

This concept was not a new one, but James was one of the first to lay it out in detail. The idea stuck and influenced the work of another important theory in the area of self-confidence and self-esteem : Bandura’s Self-Efficacy Theory.

Bandura’s theory states that self-efficacy is built on one’s beliefs in the likelihood of future success; those who believe they can influence the events of their lives have high self-efficacy, while those who feel they are not in control and have little to no impact on what will happen to them in the future, have low self-efficacy (Bandura, 1977).

Self-efficacy is focused on current beliefs about the future; while self-confidence is also concerned with beliefs about the future, there is a definite link to the past—after all, our self-confidence is built on our past experiences.

Deci and Ryan drew from Bandura’s work to create their own theory on another “self-” construct: self-esteem. Self-Determination Theory posits that we are all born with an inherent drive to explore our environment and thrive, and that self-esteem results from humanity’s basic needs being met:

• Relatedness
• Autonomy (Ryan & Deci, 2000)

This theory expanded the boundaries of the self-confidence/self-esteem literature by adding in the needs component; when our needs are met, according to the theory, we have all the ingredients necessary to experience healthy self-esteem and to grow and flourish as a person.

Based on these three theories, and countless other reports, articles, and studies by other researchers in the field, we have been able to put together a more coherent picture of what self-confidence is. It is a sense of belief in oneself and feeling assured of your own abilities and chances of future success, and it is in large part based on your experiences.

We explore this further in The Science of Self-Acceptance Masterclass© .

Self-Confidence vs. Self-Esteem

So, although self-confidence and self-esteem have crossed paths at many points and share some common features, they are considered two distinct constructs.

Self-esteem is a fairly stable trait that doesn’t change much in individuals—unless they put in some dedicated effort to improve it. It can generally be defined as our beliefs in our own inherent value, worth, and how deserving we are of love, happiness , success, and other good things in life.

By contrast, self-confidence does not take into consideration any beliefs about worthiness or overall value; rather, it focuses on the ability to succeed and beliefs about one’s likelihood of succeeding.

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These detailed, science-based exercises will equip you to help others create a kinder and more nurturing relationship with themselves.

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Healthy self-belief is not narcissism, bragging, or boasting. Rather, it is a realistic but optimistic evaluation of yourself and your abilities and a sense of trust and confidence in yourself.

Examples of healthy self-belief and self-confidence include:

• A woman goes on a date and has a great time; she feels like she and her date clicked and is looking forward to hearing from him. When he doesn’t call within a few days, she refrains from falling into a negative thought spiral and instead thinks, “Maybe he just isn’t the type of guy who calls right away. Or, maybe we just aren’t right for each other. I had fun and that’s what matters!”
• A man is looking for a job and sees a posting that has several requirements; he meets most of them, but he doesn’t quite reach the cutoff on a couple of them. Instead of passing it up and assuming he would never get an interview, he applies anyway and explains how he has other traits and qualifications that make up for any lack in the requirements in his cover letter.
• A student is interested in taking an Advanced Placement class at her high school and talks to her friends about it. Those who have already taken the class tells her it’s really hard and that she probably wouldn’t pass. She could trust in their judgment and pass up the opportunity, but instead, she holds firm in her belief about her own abilities and signs up anyway.

So, how do you become one of those people described above?

It isn’t necessarily an easy road, but you will probably find it more than worth the effort. Below are some tips on building your self-confidence and boosting your belief in yourself.

The team from the Mind Tools (2016) website listed several tips and suggestions for improving your self-confidence based on where you are on your journey:

• Preparing for your journey a. Take inventory of what you have already achieved. b. Think about your strengths and weaknesses (but especially your strengths). c. Think about your goals and values . d. Practice ceasing negative self-talk in its tracks and replacing it with positive thinking. e. Commit to the journey to self-confidence!
• Setting out a. Identify and enhance the knowledge and skills you need to succeed. b. Focus on the basics—don’t get bogged down in details or reaching for perfection. c. Set small goals and achieve them to “pile up successes.” d. Keep working on your positive thinking and self-talk.
• Accelerating towards success a. Celebrate your successes. b. Keep yourself grounded. c. Assess your current level of self-confidence and identify what strategies you can use to keep building it up.

If you hit a roadblock on your journey to self-confidence, don’t worry! They happen to everyone. Try to get back on track as soon as you can. You may find the following activities helpful.

Here are activities and exercises you can do to work on your self-confidence and self-esteem.

Of course, the most important thing you can do to build your self-confidence is to get some success experiences under your belt—no matter how small—but here are some other things you can try as well.

Recognizing negative thoughts

Negative thoughts are so often a drain on our self-confidence, and we may not even realize it. Negative thoughts can be sneaky, so we need to be extra-vigilant in identifying and addressing them.

Practice “listening” to your own thoughts; notice the automatic thoughts that pop into your head and pay attention to the way you talk to yourself. When you notice a negative thought, grab onto it and either write it down or just sit and think about it for a moment.

Don’t spend long thinking about the thought in its current form, though. Instead, spend your time thinking about how it can be rephrased and adapted to become a positive (or at least neutral) thought.

For example, if you catch yourself thinking, “You’re such a failure! You can’t do anything right!” try to replace it with a more forgiving phrase like, “Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. I bet I can do better next time!”

This replacement thought not only offers you forgiveness and compassion , it also helps you boost your belief in your ability to succeed in the future. Give it a try and see if it works for you!

Challenging yourself

The best way to boost your self-confidence is to open yourself up to positive new experiences and allow yourself to succeed.

If you have low self-confidence, you probably don’t like taking risks—whether those risks involve physical activity, going for a new job or promotion, talking to someone you like, or just trying a new activity. It is a classic catch-22: your low self-confidence encourages you to avoid doing the exact things that would help you build up your self-confidence.

If uninterrupted, this can lead to an ever-deepening spiral of low self-confidence; you don’t have any exciting new successes, so your self-confidence is even lower, so you feel even less like trying new things.

To break this cycle, you know what you need to do: put yourself out there, try something new, and challenge yourself!

Find one thing you are interested in and go for it. It might be a cooking class, a running group, marathon training, or volunteering for a cause you are passionate about. Whatever it is, push yourself to take a risk and watch your confidence grow.

Giving yourself the self-care you need

Self-care is incredibly important for a lot of things, but it can be especially impactful for our self-confidence.

Engage in self-care to show yourself how valuable you are, and you will feel more confident in your abilities and motivated to prove that you are right about yourself.

Remember that self-care is about much more than just getting a massage or allowing yourself to indulge in some extra-tasty food or on a Netflix binge. Make sure to take care of your body, mind, and soul by eating healthy, exercising, giving yourself a break, and engaging in whatever other self-care you need to feel good.

Practice accepting failure

This isn’t an especially fun exercise to practice, but it is a necessary one. We all fail at some point, and it does us absolutely no good to pretend that we don’t—or won’t—ever fail.

To practice accepting failure, engage in some activities that you know you will fail at. I know, it sounds terrible! Why would you do something when you know you will fail? Because practicing failure can be just as important as practicing success.

Take risks and set stretch goals for yourself. Sometimes you will achieve them, and sometimes you won’t. Whether you achieve them or not, make sure to tell yourself the same thing after: “You put a lot of effort into this and I’m proud of you for working hard.”

You don’t need to succeed to be proud of yourself and confident in your abilities (Coleman, 2017).

You have certainly heard of hypnosis before, but you may not be as familiar with hypnotherapy —and you may not know what that has to do with self-confidence.

Hypnosis is an alternative treatment that is generally not practiced as a first-line approach, but it is not uncommon for a therapist to use hypnosis in cases that call for it. A lack of self-confidence can be one such case.

While CBT and other behavioral therapies can do a great job of tackling your conscious thoughts and helping you manage your feelings and behavior, we know that there is also a lot going on in your subconscious. Hypnotherapists believe that hypnosis can help treat low self-confidence by breaking into the negative things happening in your subconscious and injecting a dose of positivity.

If you’re interested in giving it a try, check out this sleep hypnosis on YouTube.

If you’re interested in trying hypnotherapy with a qualified professional, you can learn more here .

If you’re a fan of meditation and would like to try some that are geared toward improving your self-confidence, these might be just what you’re looking for:

Guided Meditation: Self-Esteem from The Honest Guys

Guided Meditation for Confidence, Self Love, and a Better Self Image from Joe T at Hypnotic Labs

Healing Spirit: Guided Meditation for Self Esteem and Acceptance, Anxiety, and Depression from MeditationRelaxClub

If you’re ready to get pumped full of confidence and motivation, but you don’t have time to watch a whole feature-length movie, check out these TED Talks and inspirational speeches:

The Skill of Self Confidence by Dr. Ivan Joseph

Success and Self-Confidence Through Rejection by Ted Ladd

The Surprising Secret to Speaking with Confidence by Caroline Goyder

The Power of Believing You Can Improve by Carol Dweck

If you’re looking for some inspirational self belief quotes or motivating affirmations to help you boost your self-confidence, check out this list of 19 quotes and affirmations.

“A great figure or physique is nice, but it’s self-confidence that makes someone really sexy.”

Vivica A. Fox

“One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation.”

Arthur Ashe

“Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.”

Thomas Carlyle

“To excel at the highest level—or any level, really—you need to believe in yourself, and hands down, one of the biggest contributors to my self-confidence has been private coaching.”

Stephen Curry

“With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.”

“Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings.”

Samuel Johnson

“Smile, for everyone lacks self-confidence and more than any other one thing a smile reassures them.”

Andee Maurios

“The way to develop self-confidence is to do the thing you fear and get a record of successful experiences behind you.”

William Jennings Bryan

“My self-confidence didn’t come from my appearance, it came from other things that I did. But certainly not my appearance.”

Alex Spanos

“I’ve studies the lives of the 20th century’s great businessmen and concluded that self-confidence was instrumental in all their success.”

Ron Perlman

“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.”

E.E. Cummings

“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.”

If these quotes don’t quite hit the spot, you may benefit from creating some self-confidence affirmations. You can also create your own, but these are some good examples that can help get you started:

• “I am smart, competent, and capable.”
• “I am growing and changing for the better.”
• “I believe in myself and my abilities.”
• “I can do anything I set my mind to.”
• “I act with confidence and with a plan, but I accept that plans can change.”
• “It is enough to have done my best.”
• “I have the power to change myself.”

17 Exercises To Foster Self-Acceptance and Compassion

Help your clients develop a kinder, more accepting relationship with themselves using these 17 Self-Compassion Exercises [PDF] that promote self-care and self-compassion.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

I hope you found this piece a useful and informative dive into self-confidence and self-belief. It turns out that Henry Ford was mostly right—although self-confidence isn’t necessary to function in our world, it can make all the difference between “just getting by” and thriving!

If you found any of these exercises useful, bookmark this page so you can come back to it at any time and remind yourself that you can do it—whatever it is!

What are your thoughts on this topic? Do you think self-confidence is the key to success? How do you give yourself a boost of confidence when you need it? Let us know in the comments section!

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Self Compassion Exercises for free .

• Bandura, A. (1977). Self-efficacy: Toward a unifying theory of behavioral change. Psychological Review, 84, 191-215.
• Coleman, C. (2017). Activities to build self-confidence. Live Strong. Retrieved from https://www.livestrong.com/article/17120-activities-build-self-confidence/
• Mind Tools Content Team. (2016). Building self-confidence: Preparing yourself for success! Mind Tools. Retrieved from https://www.mindtools.com/selfconf.html
• Mowday, R. T. (1979). Leader characteristics, self-confidence, and methods of upward influence in organizational decision situations. Academy of Management Journal, 22.
• Nayler, C. (2010). What is self-esteem? 3 theories on the function of self-esteem. Positive Psychology.org.uk. Retrieved from http://positivepsychology.org.uk/self-esteem-theory/
• Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2000). Self-determination theory and the facilitation of intrinsic motivation, social development, and well-being. American Psychologist, 55 , 68-78.

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I never recieved access to the 3 items, only the ones for 17.00. Thank you, Shari

Could you please specify which items you’re interested in? I’d be delighted to assist you further. You can reach out to me at [email protected] with your details, and I will promptly send you the relevant exercises.

Warm regards, Julia | Community Manager

It was a good experience to read this article.

GREAT content, however the free download link leads to a buy page for 17 excerciese tool book, that is a bit of a shoddy move, you should not promise anything free if you are not delivering it

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Why Self-Confidence Is More Important Than You Think

Self-confidence is linked to almost every element involved in a happy life..

Posted September 20, 2018 | Reviewed by Gary Drevitch

• Cultivating Confidence
• Find a Self Esteem Therapist

Self-confidence is linked to almost every element involved in a happy and fulfilling life. I highlight five key rewards of self-confidence below. Understanding these benefits is an important first step toward living your best life with confidence.

Less Fear and Anxiety

The more confident you become, the more you’ll be able to calm the voice inside you that says, “I can’t do it.” You’ll be able to unhook from your thoughts and take action in line with your values.

If you’ve suffered from low self-confidence, you’re probably familiar with rumination, or the tendency to mull over worries and perceived mistakes, replaying them ad nauseam. Excessive rumination is linked to both anxiety and depression , and it can make us withdraw from the world. But by filling up your tank with confidence, you’ll be able to break the cycle of over-thinking and quiet your inner critic .

Greater Motivation

Building confidence means taking small steps that leave a lasting sense of accomplishment. If you’ve ever learned a language, mastered a skill, reached a fitness goal, or otherwise overcome setbacks to get to where you wanted to be, you’re well on your way.

You might be thinking, “Well, sure, I was proud of my ‘A’ in Calculus back in high school, but what does that have to do with anything now?” If you think back to a key accomplishment in your life, you’ll likely find that it took a lot of perseverance. If you could triumph through adversity then, you can do it in other areas of your life where you feel self-doubt.

As your confidence grows, you’ll find yourself more driven to stretch your abilities. “What-if” thoughts will still arise: “What if I fail?” “What if I embarrass myself?” But with self-assurance, those thoughts will no longer be paralyzing. Instead, you’ll be able to grin and act anyway, feeling energized by your progress in pursuing goals that mean something to you.

More Resilience

Confidence gives you the skills and coping methods to handle setbacks and failure. Self-confidence doesn’t mean you won’t sometimes fail. But you’ll know you can handle challenges and not be crippled by them. Even when things don’t turn out anywhere close to what you planned, you’ll be able to avoid beating yourself up.

As you keep pushing yourself to try new things, you’ll start to truly understand how failure and mistakes lead to growth. An acceptance that failure is part of life will start to take root. Paradoxically, by being more willing to fail, you'll actually succeed more — because you're not waiting for everything to be 100 percent perfect before you act. Taking more shots will mean making more of them.

Improved Relationships

It might seem counterintuitive, but when you have more self-confidence, you’re less focused on yourself. We’ve all been guilty of walking into a room and thinking, “They’re all looking at me. They all think I look dumpy and that every word I say is stupid.” The truth is, people are wrapped up in their own thoughts and worries. When you get out of your own head, you’ll be able to genuinely engage with others.

You'll enjoy your interactions more because you won't be so worried about the kind of impression you're making, and you won’t be comparing yourself to others. Your relaxed state will put others at ease as well, helping you forge deeper connections.

Self-confidence can also breed deeper empathy. When you’re fully present, you’re more likely to notice that your date seems to be a little down, or that a friend in the corner looks like she needs a shoulder to cry on. When you’re not preoccupied with your own self-doubt, you can be the person who reaches out to help others.

Stronger Sense of Your Authentic Self

Finally, confidence roots you in who you really are. You’ll be able to accept your weaknesses, knowing they don’t change your self-worth. You'll also be able to celebrate your strengths and use them more fully.

Your actions will be in line with your principles, giving you a greater sense of purpose. You'll know who you are and what you stand for. You’ll have the skills to show up, stand up, and speak up. In other words, you'll be able to let your best self shine through.

A Few Action Steps

• Write down a favorite confidence quote and put it somewhere you'll see it often. My colleague Meg Selig has compiled a great list.
• Do you have a photograph of a time you felt confident and successful? It could be a graduation photo, a picture of you as a kid after you learned to ride a bike or anything else that resonates with you. Hang it on your fridge or bathroom mirror, and reflect on all the steps it took to get to that point.
• Try one of these self-confidence tricks from my colleague Alice Boyes.

Excerpt from The Self-Confidence Workbook: A Guide to Overcoming Self-Doubt and Improving Self-Esteem . Copyright © 2018 by Barbara Markway and Celia Ampel.

Barbara Markway, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist with over 20 years of experience. She is the author of four psychology books and has been featured in media nationwide.

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Turning Fear into Confidence—A Personal Essay

October 14, 2020

Facing obstacles throughout your life is inevitable, and the obstacles you overcome can define who you are as a person. Not only will this build character and self-confidence, it will show others how strong you remained and inspire them to overcome their own challenges.

But overcoming obstacles is no simple task. Most obstacles are incredibly hard and testing. Yet, by overcoming them, you will come to understand why they are important. The significance of overcoming obstacles in life is to make you more grounded, courageous, and wise. For me, one of these life-altering obstacles emerged during my undergraduate years.

I had a serious fear of public speaking. There were times where I would struggle with presentations and in-class discussions. When these sessions would take place, my fear built up in a pressure cooker of discouragement and convulsive anguish. I felt humiliated before my teachers, partners, and most of all, my close friends. I soon realized, however, that the same people who seemed to be the source of my fear became my lifeline, their inspirational words filling my mind and heart with positive thoughts.

Seeing my struggles, my peers tried to build me up, to increase my confidence in myself and convince me that anything, including overcoming my fear of public speaking, could be accomplished with enough enthusiasm and belief in oneself.

The obstacles we face in life can distort how we see ourselves and cripple our ability to face our fears. By facing these conflicts head on, though, we can completely flip their effect on us, transforming them into experiences that strengthen our resilience and push the boundaries of what we think is possible to achieve.

Taking everything into account everything I’ve learned from this experience and many others like it that I’ve encountered in my life, it’s clear that obstacles are impossible to avoid, and when you do encounter them, you must view them as learning opportunities. You might just surprise yourself at how easily you overcome them.

This post was written by Duke TIP’s outgoing Marketing & Communications intern, Christina Gordon. Christina graduated from North Carolina Central University in the spring of 2020.

About Duke TIP

The Duke University Talent Identification Program (Duke TIP) is a nonprofit organization that has served over three million academically talented students in grades 4–12 since it was founded in 1980. Collaborating with educators and parents, TIP helps gifted students assess the extent of their academic abilities with above-grade-level testing, recognizes them for their achievements, and provides them with a variety of enrichment benefits as well as accelerated face-to-face and online educational programs.

Essay on Building Self Confidence

Students are often asked to write an essay on Building Self Confidence in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Building Self Confidence

What is self confidence.

Self-confidence is a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgment. It is a key part of success in life. When you believe in yourself, you can face challenges with ease. Self-confidence is not about being perfect, but about knowing your worth even with your flaws.

Importance of Self Confidence

Self-confidence is very important. It helps you to speak up, take risks, and face challenges. It makes you feel good about yourself. When you’re confident, you’re more likely to try new things. This can lead to more experiences and success.

Building Self Confidence

Building self-confidence takes time and effort. Start by setting realistic goals and working towards them. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Learn from your mistakes instead of feeling bad about them. Try to stay positive and surround yourself with positive people.

Role of Positivity

Being positive can boost your self-confidence. Try to focus on the good things in your life. Be kind to yourself and others. Remember, everyone makes mistakes. It’s how you learn and grow. So, always stay positive and believe in yourself.

In conclusion, self-confidence is very important. It helps you to face challenges and achieve your goals. Remember, it’s okay to make mistakes. Learn from them and keep moving forward. Always believe in yourself, stay positive, and you can build your self-confidence.

250 Words Essay on Building Self Confidence

Self-confidence is the belief in oneself and one’s abilities. It’s like a bright light inside you that shines when you believe in what you can do. It’s a key part of success and happiness.

Why is Self Confidence Important?

Being self-confident helps you face challenges and overcome fears. It helps you do better in school, sports, and hobbies. Self-confident people are more likely to try new things, take risks, and solve problems.

Building self-confidence is like building a muscle. It gets stronger with practice. Here are some steps to build your self-confidence.

Start by setting small goals that you can achieve easily. Achieving these goals will make you feel good about yourself and boost your confidence.

Positive Self-Talk

Speak to yourself in a positive way. Instead of saying “I can’t do this”, say “I will try my best”. This positive self-talk can help build your confidence.

The more you practice, the better you get. Whether it’s math, reading, or a sport, practice can help you improve and make you feel more confident.

Don’t Fear Failure

Everyone makes mistakes. It’s part of learning. Don’t be scared of failing. Instead, learn from your mistakes and keep trying.

Believe in Yourself

The most important step in building self-confidence is to believe in yourself. You are unique and capable. Believe in your abilities and let your confidence shine.

Remember, building self-confidence takes time. Be patient with yourself, keep trying, and never give up. You can do it!

500 Words Essay on Building Self Confidence

Self-confidence is the belief in oneself and one’s abilities. It’s like a bridge between your mind and your actions. When you have self-confidence, you trust your own skills and are not scared to try new things. You feel ready to face any challenge that comes your way.

Self-confidence is important for many reasons. First, it helps you to feel good about yourself. This feeling can make your life happier and more enjoyable. Second, it helps you to reach your goals. When you believe in yourself, you are more likely to take action and work hard to achieve what you want. Third, it helps you to handle stress and problems better. If you trust your ability to solve problems, you won’t panic or feel stressed when things go wrong.

Steps to Build Self Confidence

Building self-confidence is like planting a seed and helping it grow. It takes time and care. Here are some steps you can take to build your self-confidence.

Set Realistic Goals

Start by setting goals that you can achieve. They should be challenging, but not impossible. When you achieve these goals, you will feel proud of yourself. This can boost your self-confidence.

Practice Regularly

Just like learning a new skill, building self-confidence requires practice. Try to do things that make you uncomfortable or scared. The more you do them, the more confident you will become.

Think Positively

Your thoughts can affect your self-confidence. Try to think positively about yourself and your abilities. If you make a mistake, don’t beat yourself up. Instead, learn from it and move on.

Surround Yourself with Positive People

The people around you can influence your self-confidence. Try to spend time with people who are positive and supportive. They can help you to feel good about yourself and boost your self-confidence.

Take Care of Your Body

Your physical health can affect your self-confidence. Try to eat healthy foods, exercise regularly, and get enough sleep. When you feel good physically, you are more likely to feel good mentally.

Building self-confidence is a journey, not a destination. It’s about learning to trust yourself and your abilities. It’s about facing your fears and overcoming challenges. And most importantly, it’s about believing in yourself, even when things get tough. So, start today, take small steps, and watch your self-confidence grow.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

If you’re looking for more, here are essays on other interesting topics:

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Home — Essay Samples — Psychology — Positive Attitude — The Power of a Positive Mindset

The Power of a Positive Mindset

• Categories: Attitude Human Behavior Positive Attitude

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Article • 12 min read

How to Build Self-Confidence

Preparing yourself for success.

By the Mind Tools Content Team

Self-confident people seem at ease with themselves and their work. They invite trust and inspire confidence in others. These are all attractive characteristics to have.

But it's not always easy to be confident in yourself, particularly if you're naturally self-critical or if other people put you down. Thankfully, there are steps you can take to increase and maintain your self-confidence.

This article explains what self-confidence is and why it matters. We'll explore how to believe in yourself and how to project this belief to others, so that you can be more effective and happier in your life and work.

People who are self-confident perform better at work, so it's important to nurture your team members' self-confidence, too. Our article, How to Build Confidence in Others , discusses how you can do this for co-workers or even your boss.

What Is Self-Confidence – and Why Is It Important?

Self-confidence means trusting in your own judgment, capacities and abilities. [1] It's about valuing yourself and feeling worthy, regardless of any imperfections or what others may believe about you.

Self-efficacy and self-esteem are often used interchangeably with self-confidence. But they are subtly different.

We gain a sense of self-efficacy when we see ourselves mastering skills and achieving goals. This encourages us to believe that, if we learn and work hard in a particular area, we'll succeed. [2] It's this type of confidence that leads people to accept difficult challenges and keep going in the face of setbacks.

Self-esteem is a more general sense that we can cope with what's going on in our lives, and that we have a right to be happy.

Also, self-esteem comes, in part, from the feeling that the people around us approve of us. We may or may not be able to control this, and if we experience a lot of criticism or rejection from others, our self-esteem can easily suffer unless we support it in other ways.

Confidence and Behavior

Take a look at the table below, which compares confident behavior with behavior that's associated with low self-confidence. Which thoughts or actions do you recognize in yourself?

As these examples show, low self-confidence can be self-destructive, and may manifest itself as negativity.

Self-confident people are generally more positive – they value themselves and trust their judgment. But they also acknowledge their failures and mistakes, and learn from them.

Take our short quiz to find out how self-confident you are right now. You'll also discover ways to improve your confidence levels by building self-efficacy.

Why Self-Confidence Matters

Self-confidence is vital in almost every aspect of our lives, yet many people struggle to find it. Sadly, this can become a vicious cycle: people who lack self-confidence are less likely to achieve the success that could give them more confidence.

For example, you may not be inclined to back a project that's pitched by someone who's visibly nervous, fumbling, or constantly apologizing. On the other hand, you're persuaded by someone who speaks clearly, holds their head high, and answers questions with assurance.

Confident people inspire confidence in others: their audience, their co-workers, their bosses, their customers, and their friends. And gaining the confidence of others is one of the key ways to succeed. In the following sections, we'll see how you can do this.

How to Appear More Confident to Others

Picture anyone you know that you think of as highly confident – what characteristics do they have that make you think this? It's most likely one or more of these things:

• the way they speak (tone, how they project their voice, words),
• their energy and enthusiasm,
• how expert or knowledgeable they are about something.

You can show self-confidence in your behavior, your body language, and in what you say and how you say it.

Projecting a positive image to others can help you to improve your self-confidence. It's not simply a matter of "faking it" – if you project with confidence, others are more likely to respond well, and this positive feedback will help you to believe in yourself.

Body Language

In her book, Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges , Amy Cuddy argues that you can build confidence just by the way you move your body and hold yourself.

When we feel anxious, at meetings for instance, we tend to make ourselves smaller by slouching, hunching our shoulders, and bowing our heads. Simply sitting up straight can make you feel less stressed and more assertive .

If you're presenting, spreading your hands apart with palms slightly toward your audience shows openness and a willingness to share ideas.

Read our article, Body Language , for further tips on looking – and feeling – more confident.

Face-to-Face Communication

People with low self-confidence often find it difficult to make a good first impression – whether they're meeting a client, addressing a meeting, or giving a presentation. You may be shy or unsure of yourself, but you can take immediate steps to appear more confident.

Engaging with people is important, so maintain eye contact while you talk. This shows that you're interested in what the other person is saying, and that you're taking an active part in the conversation. Don't fidget or look away while the conversation continues, as this can make you appear distracted or anxious.

Build Expert Power

You are likely to appear (and feel) confident when you know what you're talking about. With a wealth of knowledge on a subject, you'll be more prepared to answer questions and speak on the spot.

If you lack confidence because of a gap in your expertise, work on finding out more information. Are there any relevant webinars or events you could attend? Is there a course you could take? Or perhaps you could find a mentor. See our article, Building Expert Power , and our Skillbook for more tips on this.

Rebuilding Confidence at Work

Changes to the way they work and long periods away from work negatively impact many people's confidence. One study found that over a third of people returning to the workplace after a year or more away experience a loss of confidence in their own ability. [3] You might struggle to make your voice heard in meetings, or feel lost or isolated without the company of your colleagues while working from home, for example.

To address dips in confidence, first try to identify the cause of the problem. If you feel that there are tasks you can't do, it makes sense to improve your skills. Carry out a Personal SWOT Analysis to identify your strengths and weaknesses. Then draw up an action plan to work on the areas where you're not so strong.

Other people's attitudes or behavior can contribute to your lack of confidence. You might feel that your co-workers make unfair assumptions about you. Maybe you're being bullied or are subject to microaggressions. If so, you need to call this behavior out.

You can use the Situation-Behavior-Impact Feedback Tool to make it clear to the person responsible that their behavior is harmful. If you don't feel safe talking to them, seek help from your line manager. If they're part of the problem, speak to a team member, HR, or an employee support network if you have one. Workplace bullying or discrimination is never acceptable in any situation.

People with low self-confidence often feel that they don't deserve to be happy, and that it's somehow justifiable for others to treat them badly. While the feeling may be very real, the belief is certainly not!

Three Ways to Build Your Confidence

While there are quick fixes to address acute issues with your self-confidence, building confidence in the long term requires making some changes to your lifestyle and forming robust plans. Here are three ways to do that:

1. Build Confident Habits

To develop and improve your self-esteem, aim to develop good habits – and break bad ones ! Regular exercise and a healthy diet can dramatically improve your physical and mental health . And studies have shown that getting a good night's sleep is linked with increased optimism and self-esteem. [4]

Working on your personal branding can also help. If you project a positive image of your authentic self, you'll likely start to receive the positive feedback that's so important to your self-confidence.

2. Review Past Achievements

Your self-confidence will increase when you're able to say, "I can do this, and here's the evidence." As part of your Personal SWOT Analysis, you'll have identified things that you're good at, based on your past achievements.

List the 10 things that you're most proud of in an "achievement log." Then use them to make positive affirmations about what you can do. These statements are particularly powerful if you tend to undermine your confidence with negative self-talk.

You can learn to identify and defeat any negative self-talk that's harming your self-confidence. See our article, Positive Thinking, Thought Awareness, and Rational Thinking , for more on this.

3. Set Confidence-Boosting Goals

Setting and achieving goals – and seeing how far you've come – are key ways to develop self-confidence.

Use your Personal SWOT Analysis to set goals that play to your strengths, minimize your weaknesses, and take advantage of your opportunities.

When you've identified the major goals you want to achieve, clarify the first steps you need to take. Make sure that they're small steps, taking no longer than an hour to do. This will get the ball rolling and improve your confidence through the achievement of appropriate goals.

When you're self-confident, you trust your own judgment and abilities, and have a strong sense of self-worth and self-belief.

You can take immediate steps to project greater self-confidence and address the factors that dent it. You can then develop these short-term strategies into ways to build and maintain self-confidence in the future.

Developing good habits, reviewing past achievements, and setting yourself targeted goals will improve your self-esteem, and build and maintain your confidence for the long term.

[1] Psychology Dictionary, Self-Confidence [online]. Available here .

[2] Bandura, A. (1997). ' Self Efficacy: The Exercise of Control ,' New York: Worth.

[3] Vodafone U.K., (2021). Lost Connections: Supporting returners into the workplace in 2021 and beyond [online]. Available here . [Accessed October 6, 2021].

[4] Lemola, S., Räikkönen, K., Gomez, V., et al. (2013). 'Optimism and self-esteem are related to sleep. Results from a large community-based sample,' International Journal of Behavioral Medicine , 20, 567-571. Available here .

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Understand Yourself Using Core Self-Evaluations

Developing Self-Awareness Helps Improve Resilience and Take Control of Your Career

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I really appreciate this post! Lots of great ideas here!! I read another article tonight about how to increase self esteem (https://debpreston.com/how-to-increase-self-esteem/ if you're interested) and found a tip that I think would also apply to self-confidence...master a new skill! If you pursue your interests and hobbies and gain some level of expertise, or even more than the average bear, you've got that feather to stick in your cap and give you a boost. Thanks again!!

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How to Be More Confident: 9 Tips That Work

Believing in yourself will take you far

Amy Morin, LCSW, is a psychotherapist and international bestselling author. Her books, including "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," have been translated into more than 40 languages. Her TEDx talk,  "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," is one of the most viewed talks of all time.

Rachel Goldman, PhD FTOS, is a licensed psychologist, clinical assistant professor, speaker, wellness expert specializing in eating behaviors, stress management, and health behavior change.

Verywell / Jiaqi Zhou

Ways to Be More Confident

Confidence vs. insecurity, being more confident has a lot of benefits, frequently asked questions.

The majority of us probably want to be a little more confident. A feeling of trust in your abilities, qualities, and judgment? Sign us up. The American Psychological Association defines self-confidence as "a belief that one is capable of successfully meeting the demands of a task."

It can refer to a general sense of trust in your ability to control your life , or it might be more situation-specific. For example, you might have high self-confidence in a particular area of expertise but feel less confident in other areas. Research suggests that confidence is important to health and psychological well-being .

But cultivating and maintaining confidence isn't easy and it's an easy thing to lose when you feel like you've failed or made a mistake. That's why actively working on building up your self-confidence is so crucial, it's something you have to maintain. As cheesy as it sounds, you do have to believe in yourself!

"The doubt that comes with second-guessing yourself has both internal and external repercussions," explains Hannah Owens, LMSW. "Confidence not only affects you and how you feel about yourself, but it also communicates to others that you are trustworthy and capable—which can be helpful both socially and at work."

Having a healthy level of self-confidence can help you become more successful in your personal and professional life. Research has found, for example, that more confident people tend to achieve more academically. Your level of confidence even affects how you present yourself to others.

Fortunately, there are several ways you can increase your self-confidence. Whether you lack confidence in one specific area or struggle to feel confident about anything, these nine tips can help you be more confident.

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Do you compare how you look to people you follow on Instagram? Or maybe you compare your salary to what your friend earns. Social comparison theory explains that making comparisons is natural. But it isn't likely to help boost your self-confidence. It may even have the opposite effect. 

A 2018 study published in Personality and Individual Differences found a direct link between envy and the way we feel about ourselves. Specifically, researchers noted that when people compare themselves to others, they experience envy. And the more envy they have, the worse they feel about themselves.

How do you build self-confidence when you notice that you are drawing comparisons? First, remind yourself that doing so isn’t helpful. Everyone is running their own race and life isn’t a competition.

If you’re feeling envious of someone else’s life, it's also helpful to remember your own strengths and successes. Keep a  gratitude journal to better recall the areas in life where you are blessed. This can help you focus on your own life versus focusing on the lives of others.

"Social media is especially nefarious in this way," says Owens. "It is a system practically designed to foster comparison. But remembering that people generally only post the very best and the very worst of their experiences can help you celebrate your daily victories, which can boost your confidence."

Surround Yourself With Positive People

Take a moment and think about how your friends make you feel. Do they lift you up, or do they bring you down? Are they constantly judging you, or do they accept you for who you are? 

The people you spend time with can influence your thoughts and attitudes about yourself, perhaps more than you realize. So, pay attention to how others make you feel. If you feel bad about yourself after hanging out with a particular person, it may be time to say goodbye . 

Instead, surround yourself with people who love you and want the best for you. Seek out others who are positive and can help build your confidence. Self-confidence and a positive attitude go hand-in-hand.

Take Care of Your Body

This tip for how to be more confident is based on the idea that it’s hard to feel good about yourself if you’re abusing your body. When you practice self-care , you know you're doing something positive for your mind, body, and spirit—and you'll naturally feel more confident as a result.

Here are a few self-care practices linked to higher levels of self-confidence:

• Diet : Healthy eating comes with many benefits, including higher levels of confidence and self-esteem. When you fuel your body with nutrient-dense foods, you feel healthier, stronger, and more energized, which can result in feeling better about yourself.
• Exercise : Studies consistently show that physical exercise boosts self-confidence. For instance, a 2016 study found that regular physical activity improved participants’ body image. And when their body image improved, they felt more confident.
• Meditation : More than just a relaxation practice, meditation can help boost self-confidence in several ways. For one, it helps you to recognize and accept yourself. Meditation also teaches you to stop negative self-talk and disconnect from unhelpful mental chatter interfering with your confidence.
• Sleep : Skimping on sleep can take a toll on your emotions. Conversely, good-quality sleep has been linked with positive personality traits, including optimism and self-esteem.

Caring for yourself is important to self-confidence. Make sure you are getting what you need to feel good about yourself and your abilities.

"Taking care of your body doesn't just mean looking good," explains Owens. "When you make yourself and your self-care a priority, you are projecting to the world that you matter—which convinces others to feel the same way about you."

Be Kind to Yourself

Self-compassion involves treating yourself with kindness when you make a mistake, fail, or experience a setback. It allows you to become more emotionally flexible and helps you better navigate challenging emotions, enhancing your connection to yourself and others.

Hannah Owens, LMSW

Taking care of your body doesn't just mean looking good...When you make yourself and your self-care a priority, you are projecting to the world that you matter—which convinces others to feel the same way about you.

A 2015 study connects self-compassion with self-confidence. So the next time you're in a challenging situation, recognize that being imperfect or falling short at times is a part of being human. Do your best to navigate these experiences with compassion toward yourself.

Practice Positive Self-Talk

Negative self-talk can limit your abilities and lessen your self-confidence by convincing your subconscious that you "can't handle" something or that it is "too hard" and you "shouldn't even try." Self-talk that is optimistic, on the other hand, can foster self-compassion and help you overcome self-doubt and take on new challenges.

The next time you begin to think that you have no business speaking up in a meeting or that you are too out of shape to work out, remind yourself that your thoughts aren’t always accurate. Then find a way to turn those thoughts around into more positive self-talk .

Here are a few examples of ways to challenge pessimistic self-talk and reframe your thoughts into a more positive way of thinking, increasing your self-confidence along the way:

• "I can't handle this" or "This is impossible" becomes "I can do this" or "All I have to do is try."
• "I can't do anything right" becomes "I can do better next time" or "At least I learned something."
• "I hate public speaking" becomes "I don't like public speaking" and "Everyone has strengths and weaknesses."

Face Your Fears

Stop putting things off until you feel more self-confident—like asking someone on a date or applying for a promotion. One of the best ways to build your confidence in these situations is by facing your fears head-on .

Practice facing some of your fears that stem from a lack of self-confidence. If you’re afraid you’ll embarrass yourself or think that you’re going to mess up, try anyway. A little self-doubt can even help improve performance. Tell yourself it’s just an experiment and see what happens.

You might learn that being a little anxious or making a few mistakes isn’t as bad as you thought. And each time you move forward, you gain more confidence in yourself. In the end, this can help prevent you from taking risks that will result in major negative consequences.

"This is, of course, easier said than done," says Owens, "but even small victories can help. Consider this a kind of exposure therapy - even a little progress is still progress!"

Do Things You're Good At

What happens when you do things that you are good at? Your self-confidence starts to soar. Your strengths become even stronger, which helps improve your belief in yourself. Taking this approach also has another benefit: it can increase how satisfied you are with your life.

One study found that believing in your ability to build on your personal strengths is moderately related to life satisfaction levels. This starts with identifying what those strengths are. Then, work to make them stronger by engaging with them regularly.

If you're good at a certain sport, for instance, make it a point to train or play at least once a week. If you're good at a particular task at work, try to do that task more often. Building on your strengths can also help you build your self-confidence.

Know When to Say No

While doing things you're good at can give your self-confidence a boost, it's equally important to recognize situations that can cause your confidence to plummet. Maybe you find that every time you participate in a certain activity, you feel worse about yourself instead of better.

Saying no to activities that tend to zap your self-confidence is okay. Certainly, you don't want to avoid doing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable because discomfort is often part of the personal growth process. At the same time, there's nothing wrong with knowing your boundaries and sticking to them.

Setting social and emotional boundaries enables you to feel safer psychologically. It can also help you feel more in control. Self-confidence is, in part, feeling like you have control over your life. Boundaries help establish this feeling of control.

The next time someone suggests doing something that you know will lower your self-confidence, respectfully decline. You don't have to avoid that activity forever either. Once you learn how to be more confident, you may feel strong enough to try it again—without hurting the confidence you have in yourself.

Set Realistic Goals

Pursuing your goals often involves failing several times until you figure out what works. This can make you wonder if you have what it takes to succeed. It can also leave you questioning how to be more confident while still achieving your dreams. The answer lies in setting realistic goals.

Setting high-reaching goals and failing to achieve them has been found to damage confidence levels. Conversely, realistic goals are achievable. And the more you achieve your goals, the greater your confidence in yourself and your abilities.

To set realistic goals , write down what you want to achieve. Next, ask yourself what chance you have of attaining it. (Be honest!) If the answer is slim to none, the goal may be a bit too lofty. Dial it back so it is more realistic and more achievable.

This may require doing a bit of research on your part. For instance, if you have a goal to lose weight, experts recommend losing one to two pounds per week for healthy, long-term weight loss. Knowing this helps you set a goal in line with this guideline, boosting your self-confidence when you hit it.

Press Play for Advice on Confidence

Hosted by therapist Amy Morin, LCSW, this episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast shares strategies that can help you learn to truly believe in yourself, featuring IT Cosmetics founder Jamie Kern Lima. Click below to listen now.

Follow Now : Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Google Podcasts

When learning how to be more confident, it can be helpful to understand how someone with self-confidence is different from someone who is more insecure. Here are just some of the differences between the two.

Celebrate other people's success

Open-minded

Willing to take risks

Laugh at themselves

Always learning and growing

Admit mistakes

Accept responsibility

Judge and are jealous of others

Close-minded

Pessimistic

Afraid of change

Act like a know-it-all

Make excuses

Blame others

Being confident in yourself just feels good. That said, having self-confidence can also bring many additional benefits at home, at work, and within your relationships. Here's a look at a few of the positive effects of learning how to be confident:

• Better performance : Rather than waste time and energy worrying that you aren't good enough , you can devote your energy to your efforts. Ultimately, you'll perform better when you have more self-confidence.
• Healthier relationships : Having self-confidence not only impacts how you feel about yourself, but it helps you better understand and love others. It also gives you the strength to walk away from a relationship if you're not getting what you want or deserve.
• Openness to try new things : When you believe in yourself, you're more willing to try new things. Whether you apply for a promotion or sign up for a cooking class, putting yourself out there is a lot easier when you have confidence in yourself and your abilities.
• Resilience : Believing in yourself can enhance your resilience or ability to bounce back from any challenges or adversities you face in life.

Learning how to be more confident can have a range of positive effects on your life. In addition to helping you feel better about yourself and your abilities, self-confidence can make your relationships stronger and make you more resilient to stress.

Keep in Mind

Everyone struggles with confidence issues at one time or another. Fortunately, there are several things that you can do to boost self-confidence. In many cases, learning how to act confident can actually help you feel more confident.

"This is similar to the adage that the physical act of smiling can trick your brain into feeling happier," says Owens. "If you exude confidence, even when you don't feel that way, others will treat you differently, which will boost your confidence—and thus the cycle continues."

Sometimes low self-confidence is a sign of a mental health condition such as depression or anxiety . If your self-confidence interferes with your work, social life, or education, consider talking to a mental health professional. A therapist can help you better understand the issue, recommend treatment, and work with you to develop skills to build your self-confidence.

If your confidence tends to lag in social situations, try to change your perspective. Instead of looking at group interactions as a stressor, view them as an opportunity to work on building your self-confidence. Taking someone with you who makes you feel confident can also give you the self-belief needed to feel more comfortable around groups of people.

Creating the social event yourself may help as well because you will know what to expect and have some level of control. If social situations cause you great anxiety along with reduced self-confidence, talking to a mental health professional can help.

One way to develop self-confidence in a relationship is to recognize your worth. When you know the value you bring to others, it helps you feel more confident in yourself. It can also be helpful to stay in the present and not worry about the past or the future.

If your lack of confidence in relationships is due to a fear of being rejected, remember that not everyone is compatible. Just as you might not be for them, they might also not be for you—it's nothing personal.

If your lack of confidence in the workplace is tied to concerns about your performance, check in regularly with a superior to see how you're doing. Ask for feedback about areas where you can improve, then work on them to feel more confident in your duties.

It can also be helpful to consider where you excel at work and perform these activities as often as possible. If you do make a mistake, admit it, learn from it, and move on. No one is perfect, so you shouldn't expect yourself to be either.

If your self-confidence is tied to your physical appearance, developing a more positive body image can help. Instead of focusing on areas of your body that you dislike, spend more time appreciating the areas you feel good about.

Another tip for how to become more confident is to not compare your body to anyone else's. No two bodies are the same and each has its own strengths. Remember that there is room in this world for people of all shapes and sizes.

American Psychological Association. Self-confidence .

Perry P. Concept analysis: Confidence/self-confidence . Nurs Forum . 2011;46(4):218-30. doi:10.1111/j.1744-6198.2011.00230.x

Stankov L, Morony S, Lee YP. Confidence: The best non-cognitive predictor of academic achievement? Educat Psychol . 2014;34(1):9-28. doi:10.1080/01443410.2013.814194

Vrabel JK, Zeigler-Hill V, Southard AC. Self-esteem and envy: Is state self-esteem instability associated with the benign and malicious forms of envy?   Pers Individ Diff . 2018;123:100-104. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2017.11.001

Rafiei H, Senmar M, Mostafaie M, et al. Self-confidence and attitude of acute care nurses to the presence of family members during resuscitation . British J Nurs . 2018;27(21). doi:10.12968/bjon.2018.27.21.1246

Duke University Personal Assistance Service. Self-care tips for the body & soul .

Zamani Sani SH, Fathirezaie Z, Brand S, et al. Physical activity and self-esteem: Testing direct and indirect relationships associated with psychological and physical mechanisms . Neuropsychiatr Dis Treat . 2016;12:2617–2625. doi:10.2147/NDT.S116811

Lemola S, Räikkönen K, Gomez V, Allemand M. Optimism and self-esteem are related to sleep. Results from a large community-based sample .  IntJ Behav Med . 2013;20(4):567-571. doi:10.1007/s12529-012-9272-z

Arslan C. Interpersonal problem solving, self-compassion and personality traits in university students . Educ Res Reviews . 2015;11(7):474-81. doi:10.5897/ERR2015.2605

Walter N, Nikoleizig L, Alfermann D. Effects of self-talk training on competitive anxiety, self-efficacy, volitional skills, and performance: an intervention study with junior sub-elite athletes .  Sports (Basel) . 2019;7(6):148. doi:10.3390/sports7060148

Martins I, Perez Monsalve JP, Velasquez Martinez A. Self-confidence and fear of failure among university students and their relationship with entrepreneurial orientation: Evidence from Colombia . Academia Revista Latinoamericana de Administracion . 2018;31(3):471-85. doi:10.1108/ARLA-01-2018-0018

Woodman T, Akehurst S, Hardy L, Beattie S.  Self-confidence and performance: A little self-doubt helps .  Psychol Sport Exer . 2010;11(6):467-470. doi:10.1016/j.psychsport.2010.05.009

Tsai CL, Chaichanasakul A, Zhao R, Flores LY, Lopez SJ. Development and validation of the strengths self-efficacy scale (SSES) . J Career Assess . 2013;22(2):221-232. doi:10.1177/1069072713493761

University of South Florida Counseling Center. What is self-confidence?

Höpfner J, Keith N. Goal missed, self hit: Goal-setting, goal-failure, and their affective, motivational, and behavioral consequences . Front Psychol . 2021;12:704790. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2021.704790

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. What is healthy weight loss?

Hyseni Duraku Z, Hoxha L. Self-esteem, study skills, self-concept, social support, psychological distress, and coping mechanism effects on test anxiety and academic performance .  Health Psychol Open . 2018;5(2):2055102918799963. doi:10.1177/2055102918799963

By Amy Morin, LCSW Amy Morin, LCSW, is a psychotherapist and international bestselling author. Her books, including "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," have been translated into more than 40 languages. Her TEDx talk,  "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," is one of the most viewed talks of all time.

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9 Building Self-Confidence in Writing

On building self-confidence in writing.

by A. J. Ortega

• Think About Confidence
• Build Your Own Self-Confidence
• Self-Confidence Within the Writing Process
• Final Thoughts

THINK ABOUT CONFIDENCE

When we are good at something, we are also confident in doing it. Sometimes it is helpful to look at examples of people who are exceptional at something and figure out why they are so confident. As you read this article, you will examine a couple of popular examples of self-confidence, understand how to develop your own, and eventually use it become a more confident writer.

One of the most confident boxers was Muhammad Ali. In this short video clip from the documentary  When We Were Kings , Muhammad Ali speaks at a press conference before fighting George Foreman. Remember that everything we study has context, so here is a little bit of history to preface the clip:

• Almost everyone, from sports analysts and fans, had George Foreman picked to win this fight, called “The Rumble in the Jungle.”
• Foreman had 40 fights and almost all were knockouts.
• Foreman entered as the current champion, after defeating Joe Frazier in two rounds.
• Ali was a 4-to-1 underdog.
• Ali changed his name from Cassius Clay for religious reasons and thus refers to himself as such, in the third person, when referring to the past.

Now, with that context in mind, here’s the short video (the first 1:20):

Critical Thinking

What people typically take away from this, and what is perhaps most memorable and enjoyable, is the flowery language, funny rhymes, and playful attitude. Most of us think that is confidence. But, if we look closer and study the language, the more introspective Ali is revealed. The confidence is demonstrated when he says things like this:

• “That’s when that little Cassius Clay … came up and stopped Sonny Liston. … He was gonna kill me!”
• “I’m better now than I was when you saw that 22-year-old undeveloped kid running from Sonny Liston.”
• “I’m experienced now.”
• “[My] jaw’s been broke, … been knocked down a couple times.”

Without those lines, Ali could be characterized as arrogant, pompous, or cocky. But, as we can see through his language, he actually admits his faults and shortcomings. He reflects and makes no excuses for losing a couple of times in his past. In fact, he uses this as fuel to improve and build his confidence. He wasn’t born confident. He calls himself “undeveloped” at one point. As we know, he becomes quite developed in a specific skill: boxing. And he won the fight against Foreman in spectacular fashion.

BUILDING YOUR OWN SELF-CONFIDENCE

But what does this have to do with writing? Muhammad Ali was a boxer and this is English class, right? In order to see the connection a bit clearer, we have another video clip. This piece is by a soccer coach. Another athlete. It may seem off topic, but these are people with high-level skills. Soccer is a skill. Boxing is a skill. And writing is a skill. These are not merely talents or gifts. And, believe it or not, self-confidence is a skill.

This piece is a bit longer, a TEDxTalk that clocks in at about thirteen minutes but is worth every second. The title is “The Skill of Self-Confidence” by Dr. Ivan Joseph. In it, Dr. Joseph explains that, as a coach, he believes self-confidence can be trained.

While Dr. Joseph says he doesn’t use note cards and warns that his talk may go all over the place, he is very well-organized. In some ways, speeches like this are verbal essays. His thesis, or argument, is that self-confidence is a skill that can be developed. He gives us four ways to do this, along with personal examples:

• use repetition (persistence)
• stop negative self-talk (and start positive self-talk)
• build confidence in others (catch them when they’re good)
• take criticism or analyze feedback (in a way that benefits you)

As you can see, confidence can be developed and improved. These tips aren’t just about soccer or student athletes. This can be applied to a multitude of tasks, goals, skills, or hobbies.

SELF-CONFIDENCE WITHIN THE WRITING PROCESS

First you saw a good example of self-confidence in boxer Muhammad Ali. Then you watched Dr. Ivan Joseph explain that self-confidence is a skill that can be developed, just like any other. Now we are ready to see some of this applied to the writing process. Despite the range of writing genres out there, several of the fundamental steps in the writing process are universal. You can observe this in essayists, poets, screenwriters, songwriters, reporters, and so on.

For this example, I want to share a video from  The New York Times ’ Diary of a Song series on YouTube. This episode focuses on English musician Ed Sheeran and his writing process as he came up with “Shape of You.” I actually don’t know a ton about him except his songs are everywhere. He holds all sorts of records for album sales and song downloads, and he’s an international star for his music. He’s won awards for his singing and songwriting. Even if it is not your type of music, generally, it is undeniable that Sheeran is prolific and successful. And he is, in part, a writer.

On top of employing some of the strategies from the TEDxTalk, Ed Sheeran also reminds us of several parts of the writing process:

• brainstorming

Sheeran has brainstorming sessions with his producers and co-writers. He even outlines the song with the beat and uses his vocal mumbling as placeholders. He drafts the song by trying lyrics, trying different lyrics, and then deciding which is better. He does revision through a type of peer review with his collaborators. He edits lyrics based on feedback.

It should be pointed out that this song was written quickly, which is unique. But with all of the practice he has at songwriting, and the confidence he’s built along the way, it should be expected that he is faster at writing a song than the average person. In other words, he’s put in the work, just like Muhammad Ali or Michael Jordan.

Even still, there are other writing tips to pick up from Sheeran’s process. For example, he even steps away from his work to play with Legos, which is imperative to big writing projects. This is why you need to take time on your writing projects—so you can get away and do something else for a while, which sometimes ignites a creative spark, or at least provides your mind a rest.

FINAL THOUGHTS

When learning the writing process, it is important to remember that you can build that skill with practice. Providing an opportunity to practice the writing process is part of what college English courses are supposed to do for you.

Similarly, the skill of self-confidence can also be developed. It isn’t an innate skill. It isn’t something you were just born with. Now you have examples of self-confidence from figures in sports and entertainment, but you also have some strategies to work on cultivating it for yourself. You can utilize this skill and continue to grow in your writing classes, subject courses, workplace, and beyond.

Building Self-Confidence in Writing Copyright © 2020 by Liza Long; Amy Minervini; and Joel Gladd is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 4.0 International License , except where otherwise noted.

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Positive Attitude and Self Confidence

I’m fairly sure that you would agree that a positive attitude can make a huge impact on all areas of your life. But did you know there, that may actually lengthen your life? This is exactly what The Ohio Longitudinal Study of Aging and Retirement found. This study was carried out by Robert Atchley, PhD. in Oxford, Ohio. Over 1,100 people over the age of 50 participated in the study. There were many follow ups during the years. In the 1990s, Yale University Psychologist Becca Levy, PhD researched the answers of the participants and compared the answers with the average lifespan of those who completed the survey. She discovered that those who gave answers showing a positive attitude towards aging lived 7.6 years longer than those who didn’t.

Isn’t that amazing? A positive attitude not only gives you self confidence to succeed, it also actually benefits your health.

Positive Thinking and the Impact it Can Have on Your Life

Your mind is a lot more powerful than you think. Growing research is starting to prove the many benefits that can come from positive thinking. According to Mohanty (2009) , a positive attitude affects self-esteem and happiness at work, and this also is likely to enable a worker to earn a higher salary. This positive attitude at work may also be reflected in life , and success at work may be mirrored in daily life.

A positive attitude enables us to cope better with the challenges of life.

A positive attitude can be linked to sleep. This study , published in the Journal Of Adolescence in 2013, compared the effects of sleep and tiredness on positive attitude and academic success. The study showed that if adolescents get less than eight hours of sleep, they feel tired during the day, they will not have a positive attitude and their studies suffer as a result.

It is probable that corresponding links exist between sleep, tiredness and positivity in adults as well. So, if you find yourself suffering from a negative outlook, improving the quality of your sleep could help you to become more positive.

A positive attitude can help you to become more successful in everything you do in your life. According to Jeff Keller, in his book “Attitude is Everything”, positive thinking can give you more energy, help you to feel younger and enable you to achieve your goals in life.

Your attitude can have a positive impact on many other areas of your life such as:

• Your self-confidence
• It helps you cope with stress
• It can promote self-improvement
• Your health and well-being
• It can affect your behaviour
• Your fear and inner conflict can be easier to deal with
• It makes change possible

This list could be much longer, as a positive attitude affects so many aspects of life that really make a huge difference to your happiness and confidence. Let’s now take a look in more detail at each of these ways that positive thinking can help you.

Positive Thinking Builds Your Self-Confidence

Self confidence is very important in this world of high competition for jobs and the skills we now need to cope with technology and all the rest. Confidence is closely connected to positive attitude. it’s a good idea, therefore to work on your self confidence.

According to Erin Wehr-Flowers, in this article , both younger and adult women were less confident than men of the same age and this causes them to limit the choices they make to take up professions or activities which are traditionally thought to be more suitable for men.

The study mentioned above also concludes that women generally have a less positive attitude and are more likely to expect a negative outcome when faced with challenges and difficulties. this also confirms that in order to be more positive it is necessary to build confidence. So how can you do that? Check out this confidence-boosting course now .

Positive Thinking Helps You Cope With Stress

Start thinking positively. When you’re hit with an especially difficult problem, a little optimism can go a long way to improving your circumstances (or at least the way you feel about them). Pessimists tend to dwell on the negative, what’s wrong, what can’t be changed, etc. This line of thinking leads to increased stress and no solution for how to deal with the problem. here’s how to end your negative thoughts and improve your attitude.

A positive attitude can help you to put everything into perspective and see your circumstances for what they are. It is important to understand what you can control and change, and what you cannot. Being positive and having confidence will give you the motivation to move past any stressful situation.

Positive Thinking Can Enhance Self-Improvement

Self-improvement is something everyone should be focused on. It is only through continual learning and improvement that you’re able to be the best version of yourself. The sheer thought of, “I can do it”, can drive you to achieve things that a defeated attitude will make impossible.

Be aware though that in order to achieve real self-improvement you need to deal with your problems first. Whether you’re contemplating going to Casa Capri recovery program for a bad drug habit, or trying to work on your professional skills so you can land that promotion, positive thinking is half the battle. When you believe in your mind that you have the ability to be and to improve, everything else seems to fall into place and the motivation you need to persevere is somehow manifested within.

If you’re suffering from low self-esteem one of the first things I would recommend is to change the way you think. Self-hypnosis can really help with this, and through changing your subconscious thinking, you can change your behaviour.

When you look at yourself and see only what is wrong, essentially you begin to feel worse about yourself and your ability to get things done drops dramatically. However, if you flip the script and start making positive affirmations about yourself like, “I am worthy”, “I can accomplish this”, “I am attractive”, you start to feel it and therefore act on those positive thoughts.

Just look at the world around you and compare those who have a positive attitude and those who always see the negative in everything. Who has a better life? Who is more successful? Who is happier?

Positive Thinking Can Positively Impact Your Health

If you knew that having positive thoughts regularly would improve your immune system, would you be willing to think positively? Well, studies are increasingly finding that when you’re happy, the body releases super disease-fighting chemicals that can help to alleviate symptoms for everything from the common cold or flu to cancer.

There’s something about having a positive outlook on life that does the body good. If you’ve been plagued by negative energy, thoughts, and behaviors, it’s time to retrain your brain. Start looking on the bright side of things more often and state positive affirmations regularly to encourage yourself to have good thoughts about who you are and the positive change you can accomplish in your life.

There is good evidence that a positive attitude and thinking can help patients to cope with serious illnesses such as Cancer (see this article by Youll and Meekosha, 2011), and even to increase the chances of overcoming it.

There is quite a bit of evidence that the opposite of a positive attitude, ie. depression and negative thinking, can increase the likelihood of heart disease ( see this article by Anda et al. 1993). It would seem that positive attitude would have the opposite effect and protect someone from heart disease or at least lessen the chances of this.

In fact, this recent study found that positive attitude can indeed help reduce heart problems, especially cardiac arrest. The study divided patients in to high, medium and low risk groups and the results were that positive wellbeing decreased cardiac arrest by half in the high risk group, by a third in the medium risk and by 13% in the low risk group.

So it seems pretty conclusive! If you want to be healthy, you need to be more positive.

The Importance That Your Actions Match Your Attitude

One important factor to consider carefully is how your actions and behaviour match your attitude. For example, if you believe you think negatively, you need to not only change your attitude so you think more positively, you need to behave positively too. Just changing your attitude is not enough. First, think about how your attitude causes you to behave in different situations. If you were more positive, what would you do differently? How would your life change?

Attitude or action first?

Which is better?

1. change your negative attitude and hope that will change the way you act

2. change how you act and hope that will change your attitude

I think the best is to work on both but start with your attitude. What you need is for the two to be in balance – positive attitude and behaviour.

How To Overcome Your Inner Conflicts and Fear

Let’s look at how to overcome negative thinking as this is often the first step towards developing a positive mindset.

The inner conflicts going on in your mind come from fear. To end negative thoughts it is necessary to deal with this fear. The conflict in your mind can cause you to be in a prison of negativity. So how to break free? Check out these outstanding books on my recommended page .

Thoughts cause your fear, the belief that something bad or harmful is going to happen ( Bassey Eneyo, 2018 . Philosophy of Fear: A Move to Overcoming Negative Fear ).

Stop Thinking the Worst Will Happen – a Lesson to Learn

One thing I’ve learnt in my life is that things sometimes seem scary and if I allow my mind to race away into a negative cycle of thoughts, I begin to believe that the worst that could happen, will. This kind of thinking is quite common I believe. I can only say that from my experience, and all the fear I had of what might happen at certain points in my life, it was never half as bad as I imagined it would be.

We moved around so much when I was a child and each time I imagined the place, the new school, the people I imagined they would all be terrible. But it was always better than my mind had imagined. The place was nicer, the people were friendlier and everything was easier.

Never fear the future. It is unknown but that is the beauty of it. Everything is possible.

Next time you think about a change that is happening and begin to think about the things that could go wrong, stop and change the thoughts and ask yourself “What could go right? What if everything will be better than it is now? What might improve? Changing your mind’s direction so it looks forward with hope and expectation rather then dread will open up a new world of possibilities.

Positive Attitude Gives You The Power to Change

You have it in your power to change many things in your life. Some things of course are beyond your control and you must accept those things and concentrate on the things you can change. But how do you start?

First, cultivate a mindset for your growth and self-improvement.

Second, stop being critical and focus on the positives.

Once you decide what needs to be changed you can start to think about what you need to do to make those changes. Your positive attitude is vital for your motivation to change.

Change can be fearful because it is moving into the unknown. But think about this for a second. Every step into the future is a step into the unknown. Are you scared to step forward? What exactly is it that scares you?

Before moving onto the next section and discussing how to change negative beliefs, I want to leave you this link to a very helpful page. This page has some important advice on developing a positive mindset. It is aimed at college students but there is good advice here for you no matter what age or background you are.

A positive attitude can also help restore your confidence and courage to say no to others when you need to. Sometimes you will need to prioritise your own goals and feelings, don’t be afraid of this.

Change Your Negative Beliefs and become More Positive

Negative beliefs exist because you have learnt them, and you have put your faith in them as being true. This is good news because there are two important things you can do to lessen the effect these negative beliefs have over your attitude. First, challenge your beliefs and question them, you’ll discover that you may have been wrong to assume they are true. Second, you can unlearn negative beliefs and assumptions and clear your mind for more positive thoughts.

One note here, I am not saying you should stop negative thoughts, this is unrealistic , as we all have them. But if you question them and do not automatically accept them as truth, that is progress along the path of developing a positive attitude that will support you in the future.

Self hypnosis can help you change both your thinking and your behaviour so it becomes much more positive and helpful. This works because hypnosis is the same process you use to learn beliefs in the first place. It makes sense to use the same natural system to replace the negative with the positive.

Choose The Right Goals For You

Look at the beliefs connected with your goals and make sure you consider what you think you deserve, if you are capable and if your goal right for you. Is your goal realistic and do you really want it? You must be fully committed to achieve your goals because the best ones require a lot of work.

Make sure you create goals that will take you closer to where you want to be. Smaller, achievable goals are best, and even better if you believe you can attain them!

How to Develop Positive Thinking And Become a Winner

If you look at the beliefs and thoughts of champions and successful people you’ll see they all have very positive thoughts and high levels of confidence. This is not to say they think they are invincible. Failure is just a way to get closer to finding the right way to succeed.

To be a winner, you need to think like a winner. Here is a short list of some thoughts that all winners have:

• You can learn to be a winner
• You can create your own future reality
• You can choose your beliefs
• Failure doesn’t exist
• Effort brings success
• The only limit to your success and happiness is you
• There is positive in everything
• Mistakes are only mistakes if you fail to learn from them
• You don’t need alcohol or drugs to help you cope

On the last point above, drugs are a particularly negative and damaging substance that many resort to when all else fails. If you are caught in the nightmare of taking drugs you need addiction recovery and the correct mindset that will help you succeed. Never avoid seeking the help you need!

Near Life Experience – Enjoy Life More!

By Daniel Perera

Visit my son’s blog for more of his writing at  faithstatic.blogspot.com

I’ve been thinking…People ask if you ever had a near death experience…How come people never ask if you ever had a near life experience ?

There’s so much to be seen, done and experienced in this world – but the ways of our society and our time has us locked up, as though we are prisoners within the walls of our very own homes, work spaces, schools… We are so swamped with tasks that we don’t really have much time for anything else.

How many moments did you have that made you really feel alive? How many moments were you able to smile and feel happy? How many moments made you thank God or whatever you may believe in, for the life you that you have? If right now you’re thinking, ”not many”, then perhaps it’s time to make a change.

You only live once. So seize every opportunity and make the most of your life. Do what makes you happy. Because I’ve got news for you, something your teachers, principals or bosses are not telling you. Whether you pass an exam or fail it, whether you complete tasks on time or fail to do so, or whether you go to university or not, isn’t what is really going to define you. It’s not going to make you who you are or who you want to be.  What’s going to make you special and unique, what’s going to make you, yourself, is how you live your life, the things you do for other people out of kindness, the things you say, the way you act and the way you make others feel. What’s going to make your life special is the way you live it and the things you do, the places you go but most importantly the moments that take your breath away. That’s what really matters.

What I’m saying is, the moments in your lives – the moments that you make – are what will define you. If you want to be remembered, if you want to leave something behind once your time has come and you leave this world for a better one, then make a choice. Let that choice be to live your life, starting today, and to do what you want to do, to be the person you want to be. Figure out a way to leave a mark in this world, and do it.

How many moments did you have that made you really feel alive? How many near life experiences did you have? There comes a time when you have to make a change, and for many of us, the time is right now. What are you waiting for?

How to improve your esteem and confidence and make the hard choices

Build your Self Confidence – Hypnosis downloads – quick, easy and guaranteed to help you build your confidence (prepared by experienced psychologists and gets my full recommendation)

I hope that this page has inspired you to change your attitude and become more positive. I hope that this inspiration will turn into action that will transform you and improve your life .

• Anda, R., Williamson, D., Jones, D., Macera, C., Eaker, E., Glassman, A., & Marks, J. (1993). Depressed affect, hopelessness, and the risk of ischemic heart disease in a cohort of U.S. adults.  Epidemiology (Cambridge, Mass.) ,  4 (4), 285–294. https://doi.org/10.1097/00001648-199307000-00003
• Eneyo, M. B. (2018).  Philosophy of fear: A move to overcoming negative fear . Xlibris Corporation.
• Keller, J. (2001).  Attitude is everything . Ebook.
• Mohanty, M. S. (2009). Effects of positive attitude on happiness and wage: Evidence from the US data.  Journal of Economic Psychology ,  30 (6), 884-897.
• Perkinson-Gloor, N., Lemola, S., & Grob, A. (2013). Sleep duration, positive attitude toward life, and academic achievement: The role of daytime tiredness, behavioral persistence, and school start times.  Journal of adolescence ,  36 (2), 311-318.
• Robert C. Atchley, 2007, “Ohio Longitudinal Study on Aging and Retirement, 1975-1995”, Harvard Dataverse, V1
• Wehr-Flowers, E. (2006). Differences between male and female students’ confidence, anxiety, and attitude toward learning jazz improvisation.  Journal of Research in Music Education ,  54 (4), 337-349.
• Youll, J., & Meekosha, H. (2013). Always look on the bright side of life: Cancer and positive thinking.  Journal of Sociology ,  49 (1), 22-40.

Karl Perera BA, MA, DipLC

Karl is a fully qualified Author, Life Coach and Teacher. He is author of Self esteem Secrets His qualifications include Masters and DipLC.

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