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Spelman Supplemental Essays 2023-24

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Spelman College Supplemental Essays 2023-24

Are you wondering how to write the Spelman essays? Like other highly-ranked colleges, the application process at Spelman College is competitive. However, understanding how to write strong Spelman supplemental essays can help you put your best foot forward when considering how to get into Spelman.  

Spelman College is located in Atlanta, Georgia , and has just under 2,400 students on campus. Not only is Spelman a historically black college, but it is also a women’s liberal arts college. 

Spelman College has been ranked the number one HBCU for the past 17 years. 

In this Spelman Supplemental Essays guide, we will provide tips on how to get into Spelman, how to write a strong Spelman supplemental essay, strategies to tackle your Spelman supplemental essays, and cover the Spelman essay prompts. But, before we discuss Spelman supplemental essays and Spelman essay prompts, let’s cover some quick facts about the Spelman admissions process. 

Spelman College: Quick Facts

Spelman college quick facts .

  • Spelman College Acceptance Rate : 28%
  • High school transcript
  • 2 letters of recommendation
  • Common App and Spelman supplemental essays
  • $40 application fee or approved fee waiver
  • Common App Personal Statement (650 Words)
  • Why Spelman Essay 
  • Spelman’s application is hosted exclusively on the Common App. 
  • Early Decision: November 1 st  
  • Early Action: November 1 st  
  • Regular Decision: February 1 st  
  • When writing your Spelman supplemental essays, make sure that you are choosing the best topic for you. This means you’ll need to carefully consider each of the Spelman essay prompts and choose the one that allows you to share important information about yourself, not featured elsewhere in your Spelman application. 

Does Spelman require supplemental essays?

In short, yes! Both the Common App personal statement and the Spelman supplemental essays are included in the list of Spelman College requirements. These essays are extremely important when it comes to crafting a competitive Spelman application. 

The Spelman essay prompts are designed to share important insight into each applicant’s personality, values, skills, and future goals. No matter which of the Spelman essay prompts you choose, they’re an opportunity to properly introduce yourself to the admissions committee. 

The Common App personal statement is an important part of the Spelman application and will also likely be a requirement for other colleges you apply to. Similar to the Spelman supplemental essays, choosing a topic that you can comprehensively and passionately write about is key. But, we’ll get into the details of writing stellar Spelman essays and learn more about the Spelman essay prompts later in this guide! 

How many essays does Spelman require?

spelman supplemental essays

Spelman College requires two Spelman essays as part of the first-year admissions application. However, the first of the two Spelman essays is the Common App personal statement. This is a requirement you will have for many college applications. The second essay of the Spelman supplemental essays is school-specific and unique to Spelman. 

Like almost every college essay, each of the Spelman essays has a word count requirement. The Common App personal essay must be at least 250 words and no more than 650 words. Your Spelman supplemental essay must be between 125-200 words. As you probably noticed from the Spelman essay prompts word count, the 2023-2024 Spelman supplemental essays are more like short answer essays. But don’t underestimate their importance! Later in the article, we will discuss how the Spelman admissions committee views Spelman supplemental essays and provide some tips to make sure your Spelman supplemental essays are competitive. 

Spelman College Essay Prompts

spelman supplemental essays

Technically, there are two Spelman essay prompts on the Spelman College requirements. However, one of them is the Common App personal statement. 

As you review the Spelman essay prompts, it is important to think about your Spelman application and your Spelman essays simultaneously. What stories have you already told, and which can be expanded upon through your Spelman supplemental essays? What other aspects of your personhood would you like to include in your Spelman essays? Are there any ideas, values, or experiences that you need to expand on in your Spelman supplemental essays? Before you sit down to write your Spelman essays, asking yourself questions like the ones above can help you assess how to best choose and answer the Spelman essay prompts. 

Spelman essay prompts

Now let’s look at the actual 2023-2024 Spelman essay prompts. 

The Spelman application is exclusively hosted on Common App. The first of two Spelman essay prompts is the Common App Personal Essay. Students should choose just one of the Common App prompts to answer. 

The Common App essay prompts are as follows: 

Spelman College Essay Prompt #1

The essay demonstrates your ability to write clearly and concisely on a selected topic and helps you distinguish yourself in your own voice. what do you want the readers of your application to know about you apart from courses, grades, and test scores choose the option that best helps you answer that question and write an essay of no more than 650 words, using the prompt to inspire and structure your response. remember: 650 words is your limit, not your goal. use the full range if you need it, but don’t feel obligated to do so. (the application won’t accept a response shorter than 250 words.), 1. some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. if this sounds like you, then please share your story., 2. the lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. how did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience, 3. reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. what prompted your thinking what was the outcome, 4. reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. how has this gratitude affected or motivated you, 5. discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others., 6. describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. why does it captivate you what or who do you turn to when you want to learn more, 7. share an essay on any topic of your choice. it can be one you’ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design..

The second and last prompt on the list of Spelman essay prompts is specific to Spelman. There are not multiple Spelman essay prompts to choose from when writing the second of the Spelman supplemental essays. The Spelman supplemental essays section requires the prompt below. 

Spelman College Essay Prompt #2

Why are you interested in attending spelman college we encourage you to consider the academic, historical, and social aspect(s) that you find unique and compelling about spelman..

The second of the Spelman essay prompts may sound familiar. This is a standard why school essay and you’ve probably seen it in other college applications. Understanding how to write this type of essay is crucial when it comes to impressing Spelman admissions.

Why Spelman essay

spelman supplemental essays

As mentioned, the why Spelman essay is like other why this college essays. Spelman College has many unique features. As such, it is important that applicants consider each of these areas when writing their Spelman supplemental essays. 

Spelman is a women’s, historically black, and liberal arts college. Each of these qualities is important to consider when writing your Spelman supplemental essays. And, they have likely played an important role in your decision to apply to Spelman. 

The Spelman mission is also a critical piece of information to have when writing your Spelman college supplemental essays. For this why this college essay, the Spelman essay prompts specifically ask applicants to speak to the academic, historical, and social aspects of the college. So, let’s first look at the Spelman mission statement to better understand the values of this historic institution:

Spelman College, a historically Black college and a global leader in the education of women of African descent, is dedicated to academic excellence in the liberal arts and sciences and the intellectual, creative, ethical, and leadership development of its students. Through diverse learning modalities, Spelman empowers the whole person to engage the many cultures of the world and inspires a commitment to positive social change.

In addition to the mission and values of the college, there are many other areas that you might explore as you are writing your Spelman supplemental essays. You can research clubs and organizations on campus to discover what strikes your interest outside of the classroom. Student life is a great component to include in your Spelman supplemental essays. 

Additionally, successful Spelman College supplemental essays might explore the most popular majors and speak to why studying a certain major at Spelman would be unique. Academic fit can be a compelling topic for your Spelman essays if you can write passionately about it. Whatever aspect of the college you choose to focus on in your Spelman essays, it is important that it is authentically you.

Now that you have a sense of some of the topics you can address, let’s discuss how you might go about writing your Spelman College supplemental essays, addressing the Spelman essay prompts most effectively. 

How to write a Spelman supplemental essay

The Spelman mission statement defines the types of beliefs and values that are important to the college. Essentially, it gives students topic ideas for the Spelman essays. 

Academic programs and faculty profiles on the website can also give students valuable information to reference in their Spelman essays. However, don’t make the mistake of simply regurgitating this information back to the admissions committee in your Spelman essays. Instead, you’ll want to find ways to connect your interests, values, and passions with those of the institution in your Spelman essays. 

Here are some examples of how you can connect with the values and the academic strengths of the institution through your Spelman essays:

  • Spelman believes in engaging the many cultures of the world. How have you collaborated with people from other cultures in your high school, community, or abroad? 
  • Spelman believes in a commitment to positive social change. What social issues do you find most compelling and how might you work to change them?
  • Spelman is a historically Black college. How would attending an HBCU be particularly impactful for your future? 
  • One of Spelman’s top majors is Biology. How might you benefit from studying Biology at Spelman?
  • Spelman students have a commitment to service. In what ways have you been of service to your community?

Writing your Spelman College supplemental essays may be intimidating but with enough preparation and insight, you can craft great Spelman supplemental essays! However, the Spelman supplemental essays do not give you that many characters. So, it is important to be intentional in your word choice and sentence structure when writing your Spelman essays. 

Is Spelman College prestigious?

spelman supplemental essays

Prestige is often in the eyes of the beholder. However, if we simply look at rankings and acceptance rates, we can see that Spelman College is indeed a prestigious institution. In fact, Spelman College has been ranked by US News & World Report as the #1 Historically Black College and University for the past 17 years consecutively. Additionally, Spelman College is ranked the number 39 th liberal arts college in the nation. 

Rankings can be useful during the initial research of colleges But remember, rankings alone do not give you the full picture. Students should talk to their counselors, peers, and other networks to learn about colleges. Spelman’s prestige is well noted, but there are so many other things that make Spelman special. 

Doing research for your Spelman supplemental essays will allow you to discover Spelman College beyond the rankings. Your Spelman essays should show that you went beyond just reviewing the website and scanning the Spelman essay prompts. 

Does Spelman care about essays?

Spelman College supplemental essays are a critical part of Spelman’s holistic review process. Holistic review means that applicants are more than just their grade point average and standardized test scores. Admissions officers who use holistic review take several factors into consideration in order to select applicants who have the potential to succeed at their institution. Of course, your Spelman essays are one of these factors! 

The Spelman admissions committee is interested in service, leadership, and connection to the mission of the college.  They are also interested in understanding your interests, background, motivations, and future aspirations through your Spelman essays. Spelman supplemental essays are a great place to show who you really are as a person and how you might fit into the Spelman College ecosystem. 

Additionally, successful responses to the Spelman essay prompts will provide information that the admissions committee may not be able to gather from your high school transcript, activities list, or a letter of recommendation. Since Spelman does not offer admissions interviews, the Spelman essays are one of the few places where the admissions committee gets to hear your voice and understand your unique perspective.

Now that you understand how important Spelman essays are to your overall application, it is critical that you allot the proper time and research to your Spelman essays. This may include brainstorming for multiple Spelman essay prompts in order to choose the best one. While all students must write the why Spelman essay, they have a choice when it comes to their Common App essay prompt. Additionally, the more you know about Spelman College, the better chance you have at writing strong Spelman College supplemental essays. 

Next, let’s learn a little bit more about Spelman College! This information will help you write informed Spelman College supplemental essays. 

Additional information about Spelman College

spelman supplemental essays

Spelman College is a global leader in the education of women of African descent. However, do not make the mistake of thinking that historically black colleges like Spelman lack diversity. The Spelman campus includes students of different races and ethnicities from across the country and the world. Spelman College offers 32 majors and minors with the most popular majors being Biology, Political Science, Health Science, English, and Economics. As a liberal arts institution, there is a program of study for every interest at Spelman. 

Spelman College is one of 101 HBCU colleges. HBCUs are historically black colleges and universities. HBCU colleges were founded during a time when African Americans were unable to seek higher education in the United States. Because of this history, many HBCUs have missions and values dedicated to furthering the education and empowerment of historically underrepresented groups. Spelman College is one of the most prestigious HBCU colleges in the nation. Spelman is also a top women’s college. Central to the mission of women’s colleges , Spelman College produces alumnae who are world leaders and change agents. 

Impactful alumnae

Two of the most notable contemporary Spelman alumnae include Stacey Abrams and Rosalind Brewer. 

After graduating from Spelman in 1995, Stacey Abrams went on to law school at Yale. Stacey is the first African American Georgia House Minority Leader, the first black woman to run for governor of Georgia, the author of 8 best-selling books, and an accomplished lawyer and entrepreneur. Most recently, in the 2020 election, Stacey’s organization Fair Fight was credited for protecting voters’ rights, turning Georgia blue, and shaping the outcome of the presidential election. Stacey Abrams was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize for this work.

Rosalind Brewer is from Detroit, Michigan, and majored in Chemistry at Spelman.  Most recently Rosalind served as the CEO of Walgreens Boots Alliance and was the only Black woman leading a Fortune 500 company at the time. Prior to joining Walgreens, Roz held the positions of COO at Starbucks, President of Walmart East division, and President and CEO of Sam’s Club.  

Spelman women are shining examples of leadership and service. Before you submit your Spelman supplemental essays, think of the ways that you too can show evidence of leadership and service in your Spelman essays and your Spelman application more broadly. The Spelman essay prompts are designed to gather this information, so take full advantage of the Spelman essay prompts. 

Spelman Supplemental Essays: Final Takeaways

We’ve covered a lot of information when it comes to the Spelman essays and responding to the Spelman essay prompts. While writing strong Spelman essays may seem overwhelming, there are ways to make the process more manageable. Let’s review some final takeaways on how to best respond to the Spelman essay prompts. 

  • Read each of the Spelman essay prompts carefully. Determine how you can best use the Spelman essay prompts to share your story. Choosing your essay topic is the most important part of writing strong Spelman essays. 
  • Do your research on Spelman College before you begin writing your Spelman College supplemental essays. Understanding the Spelman mission, academic offerings, and historical context can help you write the most impactful Spelman supplemental essays. 
  • When writing your Spelman College supplemental essays, be sure to make connections between your interests and passions and those of Spelman College. Your Spelman essays can of course be creative, but they should also be comprehensive. Be sure you have a clear message. 
  • The Common App Spelman essay prompts give you many choices. Make sure to choose the Spelman essay prompts that best fit your story. You’ll want to use your essays to highlight something you haven’t been able to yet in your application. 
  • Spelman essay prompts can change each year. Be sure to check the Common App for any changes to the Spelman College supplemental essays and Spelman essay prompts. The university’s website should also have the most updated information on the application process and essays. 

Getting help can be crucial when it comes to gaining acceptance to top universities such as Spelman College. CollegeAdvisor has expert admissions counselors who can help you to write the best Spelman essays. Reach out for personalized guidance or check out our expansive library of free resources when applying to schools. 

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Spelman College is a historically Black women’s college in Atlanta, Georgia, that is now part of the Atlanta University Center Consortium. Over the years, Spelman has played a key role in training African American women for leadership and preparing them for graduate study. Spelman currently has about 2,100 students from forty-one states and fifteen foreign countries. With a ranking of 75, it was the only historically Black institution included in U.S. News & World Report’s 2008 listing of the top 100 liberal arts colleges in the United States. The college also has the highest graduation rate among historically Black institutions, and at 77 percent, its record surpasses the graduation rate for Black students at a number of high-ranking public and private institutions.

Spelman was established following the Civil War to educate emancipated slaves. Two New England women, Sophia B. Packard and Harriet E. Giles, founded Spelman in 1881 not only to teach women and girls to read, write, and do simple arithmetic, but also to prepare them to serve as teachers, missionaries, and church workers. Practical skills were also stressed as part of preparing students to be good homemakers and mothers.

In 1882, after hearing a presentation by Packard and Giles at Wilson Avenue Church in Cleveland, Ohio, one of the church members, John D. Rockefeller, became a lifelong contributor both to the school and to African American education in general. With additional support from the American Baptist Home Mission Society and its women’s auxiliary, nine acres of land and five buildings—former Union Army barracks—were purchased. The financial support of Mr. and Mrs. John D. Rockefeller, Sr., together with other gifts ranging from $1 to $1,000, made it possible to complete payment of the mortgage.

The school moved to its new location in February 1883, and Packard and Giles fought a proposal to merge the female seminary with the Atlanta Baptist Seminary, a school for males. Packard and Giles believed that their female students would be better served by keeping the schools separate. To do so, they had to raise enough money to support separate schools, and they received money from Baptists in the North and African American Baptists in Georgia. The Rockefellers donated the remaining amount needed, and in 1884, the school’s name was changed to Spelman Seminary in honor of Laura Spelman Rockefeller and her parents.

The curriculum expanded to include college preparatory classes equivalent to high school. A nurse training department opened in 1886, followed in 1891 by a missionary training department. A new building was dedicated in 1918 to house the expanded home economics program. Spelman Seminary established the College Department in 1897, although most of the college work was at nearby Morehouse College.

One of the most significant events in Spelman’s history occurred in 1924, when it changed from a seminary to a full-fledged college intended to provide a liberal arts education to its students. Under the leadership of Florence Matilda Read, who served as president from 1927 to 1953, the curriculum was expanded, with college courses established in the humanities, fine arts, social sciences, and natural sciences.

Albert E. Manley, the first Black and first male president, succeeded Read in 1953, ending nearly a half century of New England leadership. During his tenure from 1953 to 1976, Spelman strengthened its liberal arts program with the addition of non-Western and ethnic studies courses. Several other new programs were implemented in the 1970s, including freshman orientation and freshman studies, the health careers program, the family planning program, and cooperative programs with non-Black institutions.

Spelman women were active in the civil rights movement. Harry Lefever, Professor Emeritus of Sociology at Spelman, documents their participation both in Atlanta and across the South in his 2005 book, Undaunted by the Fight: Spelman College and the Civil Rights Movement, 1957–1967. Among those playing leadership roles was Marion Wright (Edelman), who later founded the Children’s Defense Fund. Howard Zinn, author of A People’s History of the United States and a member of the Spelman history faculty from 1956 to 1963, played an active role in mentoring and supporting student activists.

When Manley announced his retirement, many faculty and students assumed that in this time of new opportunities for women, the next Spelman president would be a woman. Student protests followed the appointment of an African American man, Donald Mitchell Stewart, but Stewart assumed the presidency in 1976. During his ten-year tenure, several new programs were established, including the honors program, the comprehensive writing program, and the continued education program.

The Women’s Research and Resource Center, established in 1981, was the first women’s research center at a historically Black institution. The center subsequently played a leadership role in the development of a women’s studies minor and a multidisciplinary major in comparative women’s studies. In addition to partnering with other departments to offer courses exploring issues of gender and race, the center sponsors a variety of national and international conferences and continues to support African feminist scholarship and activism. In 2004, the center joined with Sister Love, Inc., to organize a global conference on HIV/AIDS among girls and women in Africa and the African diaspora. Most recently, the center has undertaken a three-year project funded by the Ford Foundation that will explore and strengthen links among women’s studies scholars, departments, and programs in Africa and the African diaspora.

In 1987, Johnnetta Betsch Cole stepped into the role of seventh president of Spelman College, the first African American woman to do so in its 106-year history. Under her leadership, Spelman achieved national status as one of the leading liberal arts colleges in the United States. She presided over a campaign that raised $114 million, the largest amount that had been raised by a Black college or university. The endowment was tripled, rising from $42 million to $143 million. After leaving Spelman in 1998, Cole joined the Emory University faculty as the Presidential Distinguished Scholar at Emory University, where she is now professor emerita. Cole served as president of historically Black Bennett College for Women in Greensboro, North Carolina, from 2002 to 2007.

In 1998, Audrey Forbes Manley, a Spelman graduate and widow of Albert Manley, became the first alumna to serve as president of Spelman. The first African American to be appointed Assistant U.S. Surgeon General, Audrey Manley also served as Acting Surgeon General of the United States prior to her appointment to the Spelman presidency. As first lady of Spelman, she had played a key role in the establishment of Spelman’s health-careers program in 1971. Under her leadership, Spelman continued to strengthen its position as a leader in educating women in the sciences. Today, about one quarter of Spelman students major in science, engineering, or math. The school ranks second only to Xavier University, a historically Black institution in New Orleans, in the number of graduates who attend medical school. According to American Medical Association data for 2001, Xavier sent ninety-four students to medical school, followed by Spelman, with thirty-eight, and Harvard University, with thirty-seven.

Beverly Daniel Tatum succeeded Audrey Manley in 2002, becoming the ninth president of Spelman. Under her leadership, Spelman has established several new “centers of distinction.” Among them is the Center for Leadership and Civic Engagement (LEADS), formed in 2003. A year later, LEADS sponsored its first national leadership conference. Sisters Center for WISDOM (Women in Spiritual Discernment of Ministry) was also launched in 2004. Its goals include student development and leadership training programs, faculty and staff development, and community outreach. In 2007, global investment bank Lehman Brothers and Spelman announced the formation of a partnership to establish the Lehman Brothers Center for Global Finance and Economic Development. Lehman Brothers committed $10 million to support new interdisciplinary courses, a scholarship program, and recruitment of new faculty.

The college continues to offer a wide range of innovative programs, including the Summer Art Colony in Portobello, Panama, which gives students an opportunity to live, work, and study in the Caribbean; the Japan Studies Program, which includes an exchange program and an intensive four-year summer program in Japan; and the Spelman Independent Scholars Oral History Project, which pairs students with mentors from the community in a two-semester interdisciplinary and intergenerational program. Spelman also offers a five-year dual-degree program through which students can earn a bachelor’s of engineering from one of twelve participating schools, including Georgia Institute of Technology, the University of Michigan, and Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute.

Bibliography:

  • Cole, J. B. (1994). Conversations: Straight talk with America’s sister president. New York: Doubleday.
  • Cole, J. B. (1997). Dream the boldest dreams: And other lessons of life. Marietta, GA: Longstreet.
  • Guy-Sheftall, B. (1993). Spelman College. In D. C. Hine (Ed.), Black women in America: An historical encyclopedia (Vol. 2, pp. 1091–1095). Brooklyn, NY: Carlson.
  • Guy-Sheftall, B., & Stewart, J. M. (1981). Spelman: A centennial celebration. Charleston, NC: Delmar/Spelman College.
  • Lefever, H. G. (2005). Undaunted by the fight: Spelman College and the civil rights movement, 1957–1967. Macon, GA: Mercer University Press.
  • Manley, A. E. (1995). A legacy continues: The Manley years at Spelman College, 1953–1976. Lanham, MD: University Press of America.
  • Read, F. (1961). The story of Spelman College. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press.

This example Spelman College Essay  is published for educational and informational purposes only. If you need a custom essay or research paper on this topic please use our writing services. EssayEmpire.com offers reliable custom essay writing services that can help you to receive high grades and impress your professors with the quality of each essay or research paper you hand in.

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How to Get Into Spelman College: Acceptance Rate + Tips

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Reviewed by:

Rohan Jotwani

Former Admissions Committee Member, Columbia University

Reviewed: 9/28/23

Read on to learn more about how to get into Spelman College, an established institution with a rich history of revolution and empowerment. 

Atlanta, GA skyline

Source: Spelman College

Spelman College had humble beginnings. It started as the Atlanta Baptist Female Seminary in the basement of a church in the late 1800s. In a time when women, especially of African descent, were denied education, Atlanta Baptist was revolutionary. 

Since then, it has become a respected, accredited, historically Black global leader in women’s education. It aims to empower women to engage the world’s many cultures and inspire a commitment to positive social change.

If this school has piqued your interest, this guide will tell you everything you need to know about Spelman College!

Spelman College Acceptance Rate

Spelman College has an acceptance rate of 28% . Their acceptance rate has varied throughout the years, but it remains one of the most selective women’s colleges in the U.S.

Here is a record of Spelman’s acceptance rates for the past five years: 

The Spelman College early acceptance rate is 51%, which gives you a strong chance of admission. However, they’re more selective with their transfer students, as the Spelman College transfer acceptance rate is 22%. 

The Spelman College out-of-state acceptance rate is unavailable, but in the most recent academic year, roughly 73% of their American student body were out-of-state students. 

Spelman College Yield Rate

The Spelman College yield rate is 15%. The yield rate is also known as the enrollment rate and depicts the number of students who accepted their admission to a certain college.

Spelman College Admission Requirements 

Getting into Spelman requires a solid application. Students should aim for SAT scores of 1203 or higher or ACT scores of 27 or higher to be considered competitive. Additionally, achieving a GPA of 3.3 or higher will place you in the ranks of previous successful applicants.

Spelman College GPA Requirements

The first score to consider is the Spelman GPA requirements. It’s important that applicants have good grades to be considered for admission at Spelman. 

Minimum GPA Required for Spelman College

Spelman does not have minimum GPA requirements, so students do not need certain grades to be eligible for enrollment. 

However, according to their class profile, students should aim for a weighted GPA of 3.9 to fall within the competitive range of successful applicants. This equates to an unweighted GPA of about 3.3 , which is relatively low compared to other colleges. 

Spelman College Average GPA

In previous years, Spelman College has held an average GPA of about 3.8 . However, if you want to be among the top applicants to Spelman, you should aim for a 4.0 GPA . 

Here are the average GPAs of Spelman’s incoming students for the past five years: 

Spelman College SAT Requirements

Student solving math problem in notebook

Spelman College has suspended the SAT/ACT standardized testing requirement for first-time applicants for the upcoming admission cycle. Students who do not have access to these tests or believe they inaccurately reflect their potential will not be disadvantaged for not submitting scores.

However, students are encouraged to highlight other impressive aspects of their application if they choose not to submit standardized test scores. These aspects include extracurriculars , awards, social justice involvement, or other noteworthy activities.

Students with access to these tests who would like to use them to strengthen their applications can still submit their scores. These scores will be included in their applications' holistic review and will be super-scored. 

If you do choose to take the SAT , you should aim for an SAT score of around 1203.

Spelman College Average SAT Scores

It’s helpful to know average scores so that you can have a ballpark range of what to aim for on the SAT. Here are the Spelman College SAT scores of applicants from the past five years:

Spelman College ACT Requirements

Spelman’s ACT test requirements fall under the same policy as the SAT. However, you may still submit your ACT scores if you would like. If you do, you should aim for an ACT score of around 27.

Spelman College Average ACT Scores

In the table below, you’ll find the average ACT scores of Spelman applicants from the past five years: 

High School Transcripts

Spelman will use your high school transcripts to assess your academic performance and gain more insight into the courses you pursued, how rigorous your curriculum was, and how many AP or IB courses you took.

Students should pursue as many advanced courses as possible without compromising their grades. The successful completion of these courses will demonstrate better college preparation.

Letters of Recommendation

Notebook and pen

Students must also submit two letters of recommendation as part of their application. Recommendation letters are important as they provide an unbiased and trustworthy reflection of your skills, abilities, and characteristics. 

Teacher Recommendation 

Note that one of your recommendation letters must come from a teacher. The recommendation written by your teacher should highlight your key academic skills that will contribute to your success in college! 

The Activities Section

Spelman College exclusively uses the Common Application for the admissions process. As part of this application, students must complete the Activities section that asks them to list the most meaningful extracurriculars, jobs, or volunteer positions they pursued in high school.

While you can write about up to ten activities, students typically write about six on average.

Application Fee

To apply to Spelman, you’ll need to pay a $40 online application fee. However, this fee may be waived if you can provide a valid application fee waiver. 

College Transcript (If Applicable)

If you have attended college or university previously, you will need to submit your college transcript along with your high school transcripts. See our section on transfer student requirements for more information. 

Proof of English Proficiency (International Students) 

International applicants are described as anyone who is not a U.S. citizen or permanent resident. If you are an international student who is a non-native English speaker, Spelman requires you to submit your official TOEFL score along with the rest of your application. 

Transfer Student Requirements

Transfer students are required to submit the following materials to apply to Spelman: 

  • Completed application through the Common App
  • $40 application fee
  • Official transcripts from every post-secondary school attended
  • Two recommendations from post-secondary instructors/deans
  • Official high school transcript

Transfer students should also note that their application dates differ from those for incoming students. Take note of these dates: 

  • Application deadline: April 1
  • Decision notification: May 1
  • Confirm decision: June 1

Spelman College Essays with Examples

Another part of the Common Application is the personal statement . Students will be given seven prompts and must respond to one. Each of the Spelman College essay prompts focuses on a different aspect of your personality and qualities. 

Here are the seven prompts you’ll have to choose from to write your personal essay:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?

3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome?

4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you?

5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.

6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design .

Use your supplemental essay to share what’s most important to you and key details missing from the rest of your application. To give you some inspiration, we’ll look at a few example essays. 

Here is a sample essay responding to a prompt similar to Prompt #2: 

“In the summer of [YEAR], my sister was graduating college. My family and I drove to [CITY] to give our unconditional love and support and to celebrate. We ate dinner at a beautiful restaurant together and shared an amazing cake the day before. Unfortunately, it became the most tumultuous time in my life.
The 8 hour drive back was brutal on my workaholic dad; he neglected his health to keep a bright future for me and my sister. A few days after coming home, my dad went to the doctor with aggravating chest pain.
Soon after, the doctor dropped the news: my dad suffered a heart attack. I was [AGE], the youngest in my family, and refused to believe that my dad’s life could be cut short. Around this time, I was irresponsible and jaded; uncomfortable being empathetic, and always wishing problems to go away. 
The news weighed heavily on my shoulders. As I studied my dad’s condition, I soon realized and understood the great lengths he had worked to provide me a better future. Ultimately, I knew I had to change to be better for myself and for my dad. 
Post procedures, my dad returned home. Consequently, I was more empathetic, open to being vulnerable, and affectionate towards family which I had previously been too afraid to express. I would regularly hug my family members, didn’t hesitate to speak up if I was feeling scared or frustrated, listened to my dad more attentively, and I smiled more. Over the summer, I took care of my dad: I paid attention to his sodium intake, made sure he drank enough water, started doing his laundry, and slept in his room in case anything happened. There was nothing else that mattered more to me. 
I’m proud to say I can be vulnerable and act on my insecurities. I became an amicable, self-aware, and social person gaining respect and friendship amongst teachers and peers. Throughout college, I make sure to spend time with my family by cooking dinner for them once a week, sending them silly texts of cute animals, or just giving them a call. My transition to becoming more open has ultimately led to my career path as an [JOB TITLE] - creating better lives for marginalized communities. Understanding what other people go through and being susceptible will allow me to properly achieve my goals and assist those in need. 
It’s [YEAR], and my dad is in the best shape of his life. I show my gratitude by accompanying him during his checkups and scolding him for trying to eat poorly.”

This essay effectively describes a difficult situation that the student found themselves in and how they overcame it. The student isn’t afraid to talk about their shortcomings and the areas in which they needed to improve. Through this essay, they demonstrate growth, change, and a willingness to learn. 

Take a look at another example essay responding to a similar prompt to Prompt #1: 

“I am French and a proud member of the French community - for lack of a better term. This community is difficult to name definitively, because there is actually surprisingly little community between us in a traditional sense other than a loose global affiliation of people from France who all seem to share a common contempt for American cheese, an enthusiasm for our soccer team, and a powerful love of the French language.  
I have had the pleasure of meeting other French people in a plethora of contexts: in Marrakech on a camel-riding tour,  at an Italian restaurant in Connecticut, at an airport terminal in Miami, and on a tour of the Alhambra in Granada, Spain.  The common trait of all these interactions is an automatic connection formed upon our common heritage.  At the Italian restaurant, I spoke with our French waiter about his life for 20 minutes while my American family members waited to order.  Of course, all of these exchanges are in French, because all displaced Frenchmen and women share an eagerness to speak our language. Accordingly, growing up French in a half American family, my role in this atypical cross-section of a community has typically been that of the translator, ensuring communication flowed seamlessly, mellifluously, between parties.  
The transience of our community is what I love most; wherever I may be, I can find souvenirs of my grandparents’ French town, [TOWN NAME], where I spent every summer growing up.  Though there is a greater diversity of race, ideology, and geographical location amongst the French than many other cultures, our bond remains equally strong because of the pride we take in our words.  French is the official language of 39 countries, tied only with English. In all of these countries, and anywhere else that French is spoken, I am at home.”

This student’s passion and love for their culture shines through their words. It’s clear that being French is a significant part of their identity, and they do a great job of describing how their background has helped them engage with other cultures. This demonstrates empathy and openness, which are great qualities for college applications.

In your essay, remember to be genuine and write about what you truly care about. College admissions officers look for authenticity and passion in supplemental essays.

Spelman College Tuition and Fees

The total cost of attending Spelman as an incoming student, including tuition, fees, and room and board, is $46,351. There are also other charges that may apply to you, including a matriculation fee of $55 and an orientation fee of $220. 

Financial Aid and Scholarships

Spelman offers a variety of financial aid options, including loans, scholarships, and need-based aid. You will need to fill out a FAFSA form and various other financial aid forms in order to apply. 

Spelman College Application Deadlines

It’s important that you are aware of each Spelman College application deadline so that your application process can go smoothly. To avoid any delays or disruptions, mark these dates on your calendar:

Source : Spelman College

Students deciding between early decision and early action should know the former is binding and is, therefore, best for students who are certain Spelman is their first choice.

It’s also important to pay attention to the Spelman College decision date, as you will need to accept your admission to Spelman by then. Otherwise, you may lose your spot at the college. 

Tips for Getting Into Spelman College

After learning more about how to get into Spelman College, including important admission details like the high Spelman acceptance rate, GPA requirements, and other application materials, you may be wondering if there’s anything you can do to make your application stand out!

Follow these two tips to submit a stellar Spelman application:

Pursue Meaningful Community Service

Spelman has a dedication to social change. They were one of the first colleges to offer education to Black women and made revolutionary strides in America’s educational history. 

As such, they search for students with similar commitments to change and the community. Pursue extensive community service opportunities throughout high school to prove you possess these traits. 

Write an Interesting Personal Statement

Your personal statement should portray you as a dynamic, talented, and passionate student. Choose the prompt you respond to carefully and reflect on your most important experiences. Use your statement to prove your interest in Spelman and that you have something of value to contribute to their school.

FAQs: Spelman College Admissions

We’ve discussed the major admission details you should know about Spelman to decide if it's the right fit for you. For any remaining inquiries about Spelman College, read on to find your answers.

1. What GPA Do You Need To Get Into Spelman College?

Students should aim for a GPA of around 3.3 to maximize their chances of admission to Spelman College.

2. How Hard Is It To Get Into Spelman University?

Spelman College has an acceptance rate of 28%, meaning it isn’t too difficult to get into. It has a relatively low competitive GPA median, making it accessible to a wider range of students.

3. What Major Is Spelman Best Known For?

Spelman College’s most popular majors include Psychology, Biology, and Political Science, but it is well known for all of its liberal arts majors. 

4. Can I Get Into Spelman With a 3.0 GPA?

While Spelman’s competitive GPA median is closer to 3.2, you’ll likely still be able to get into this college with a 3.0 GPA. Ensure you demonstrate your academic potential through other parts of your application to increase your chances of admission.

Final Thoughts

Now that you know how to get into Spelman College, you’re ready to get started on your application! 

Spelman produces intellectual, creative, and ethical leaders striving to make a difference. If you’re hoping to join a supportive community that can help you develop into this kind of leader, consider adding Spelman to your list of top colleges!

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spelman college essay examples

Spelman College

November 4, 2021 By ccooke

Honors Program Essay Contest

spelman college essay examples

The Ethel Waddell  Githii  Honors Program has created a new essay question for applicants to our program. In this season of authorship, where we have an opportunity to write/create traditions at Spelman, this con test comes as something new. This con test invites Honors Program students to answer the same essay question as the high school applicants. The top  four   essay s  (1 per classification)  will be awarded a cash prize of  $100.00, to be awarded at the Holiday Celebration.  The deadline is Nov ember 12 th  at 5:00 pm .   Here  is the question:   

Bowen   H. McCoy’s classic essay “The Parable of the Sadhu” (1983) presents a case for examining individual and group responsibility. He shares that he and several others had spent months preparing to climb the Himalayan Mountains. At the point where this diverse group of hikers are exhausted and suffering the effects of altitude sickness, they encounter a sadhu–an Indian holy man–distressed and suffering from hypothermia. While they each attended to the man in some way, circumstantial con straints demanded that they decide to either stay with the sadhu and be assured of his fate or advance towards their individual goals. Ultimately, the group did not know “if the sadhu lived or died.” In his recounting, McCoy turns to his companion and asks, “where is the limit of our responsibility in a situation like this?” Compose a response that explains how the best answer to McCoy’s  question  serves the interests of an  Honors  Program. You have no word limit.  

Deadline :   November  12,  2021 at 5:00 pm

A digital copy of “The Parable of the Sadhu” can be found in your email.

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spelman college essay examples

12 Effective “Why This College?” Essay Examples

What’s covered.

  • Essay 1: UPenn Nursing
  • Essay 2: UPenn
  • Essay 3: UW Madison
  • Essay 4: Northwestern
  • Essay 5: NYU
  • Essay 6: NYU
  • Essay 7: Boston University
  • Essay 8: Boston University
  • Essay 9: Tufts
  • Essay 10: Tufts
  • Essay 11: Georgia Tech
  • Essay 12: Georgia Tech

Where to Get Your Essays Edited

The “ Why This College?” essay is one of the most common supplemental prompts. These school-specific essays help colleges understand if you’re a good fit for them, and if they’re a good fit for you.

In this post, we’ll share 12 “Why This College?” essay examples from real students and explain what they did well, and what could be improved. Read these examples to understand how to write a strong supplemental essay that improves your chances of acceptance.

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized.

Essay Example #1: UPenn Nursing

Prompt: How will you explore your intellectual and academic interests at the University of Pennsylvania? Please answer this question given the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying (650 words).

Sister Simone Roach, a theorist of nursing ethics, said, “caring is the human mode of being.” I have long been inspired by Sister Roach’s Five C’s of Caring: commitment, conscience, competence, compassion, and confidence. Penn both embraces and fosters these values through a rigorous, interdisciplinary curriculum and unmatched access to service and volunteer opportunities.

COMMITMENT. Reading through the activities that Penn Quakers devote their time to (in addition to academics!) felt like drinking from a firehose in the best possible way. As a prospective nursing student with interests outside of my major, I value this level of flexibility. I plan to leverage Penn’s liberal arts curriculum to gain an in-depth understanding of the challenges LGBT people face, especially regarding healthcare access. Through courses like “Interactional Processes with LGBT Individuals” and volunteering at the Mazzoni Center for outreach, I hope to learn how to better support the Penn LGBT community as well as my family and friends, including my cousin, who came out as trans last year.

CONSCIENCE. As one of the first people in my family to attend a four-year university, I wanted a school that promoted a sense of moral responsibility among its students. At Penn, professors challenge their students to question and recreate their own set of morals by sparking thought- provoking, open-minded discussions. I can imagine myself advocating for universal healthcare in courses such as “Health Care Reform & Future of American Health System” and debating its merits with my peers. Studying in an environment where students confidently voice their opinions – conservative or liberal – will push me to question and strengthen my value system.

COMPETENCE. Two aspects that drew my attention to Penn’s BSN program were its high-quality research opportunities and hands-on nursing projects. Through its Office of Nursing Research, Penn connects students to faculty members who share similar research interests. As I volunteered at a nursing home in high school, I hope to work with Dr. Carthon to improve the quality of care for senior citizens. Seniors, especially minorities, face serious barriers to healthcare that I want to resolve. Additionally, Penn’s unique use of simulations to bridge the gap between classroom learning and real-world application impressed me. Using computerized manikins that mimic human responses, classes in Penn’s nursing program allow students to apply their emergency medical skills in a mass casualty simulation and monitor their actions afterward through a video system. Participating in this activity will help me identify my strengths and areas for improvement regarding crisis management and medical care in a controlled yet realistic setting. Research opportunities and simulations will develop my skills even before I interact with patients.

COMPASSION. I value giving back through community service, and I have a particular interest in Penn’s Community Champions and Nursing Students For Sexual & Reproductive Health (NSRH). As a four-year volunteer health educator, I hope to continue this work as a Community Champions member. I am excited to collaborate with medical students to teach fourth and fifth graders in the city about cardiology or lead a chair dance class for the elders at the LIFE Center. Furthermore, as a feminist who firmly believes in women’s abortion rights, I’d like to join NSRH in order to advocate for women’s health on campus. At Penn, I can work with like-minded people to make a meaningful difference.

CONFIDENCE. All of the Quakers that I have met possess one defining trait: confidence. Each student summarized their experiences at Penn as challenging but fulfilling. Although I expect my coursework to push me, from my conversations with current Quakers I know it will help me to be far more effective in my career.

The Five C’s of Caring are important heuristics for nursing, but they also provide insight into how I want to approach my time in college. I am eager to engage with these principles both as a nurse and as a Penn Quaker, and I can’t wait to start.

What the Essay Did Well

This essay has many positive aspects, but the most impressive one is the structure. Utilizing the Five C’s of Caring to discuss Penn’s offerings was a genius way of tying in this student’s passion for nursing while also making their essay exciting and easy to read. Beginning each paragraph with the respective adjective helped focus the paragraph and allowed the student to demonstrate how they exemplify each quality without explicitly stating it. The student wasn’t afraid to think outside the box and add creativity to their essay structure, which really paid off.

Another positive is how specific and specialized the Penn resources and opportunities the student mentions are. This essay did not fall into the trap of name-dropping professors or programs. In every paragraph, there was a connection to something the student wants to do at Penn to further themselves in the respective characteristic they were describing.

Not only did this student mention a resource at Penn—whether it was a professor, a class, or a club—in every paragraph, but they elaborated on what that resource was and how it would help them achieve their goal of becoming a nurse. The what and how is what sets this essay apart from other supplements that just name-drop resources for the sake of it. The amount of detail this essay went into about some of these resources makes it clear to the admissions officers reading the essay that this student has seriously looked into Penn and has a strong desire to come to campus and use these resources.

What Could Be Improved

One thing this essay could do to make it stronger is improve the first paragraph. The student does a good job of setting up Sister Roach and the Five C’s, but they don’t mention anything about their desire to study or pursue nursing. The first paragraph mentions both Sister Roach and Penn, but left out the student. This could be fixed by simply adding something along the lines of “I can’t wait to embody these values as a nursing student at Penn” to the paragraph.

Essay Example #2: UPenn

Prompt: Considering the specific undergraduate school you have selected, how will you explore your academic and intellectual interests at the University of Pennsylvania?  For students applying to the coordinated dual-degree and specialized programs, please answer these questions in regard to your single-degree school choice; your interest in the coordinated dual-degree or specialized program may be addressed through the program-specific essay. (300-450 words)

I always loved watching the worms when it rained. I used to put my little raincoat on, sit on the doorsteps, and watch them move toward the puddles. My younger brother, forever intent on destroying the world around him, would try to stomp on the worms, and I would run after him screaming. In my imagination, the brain looked like a pile of squiggly worms. However, my neuroscience curiosity has since grown beyond a worm’s habits.

For example, my mother thought that I was insane when I wanted to watch American Murder: The Family Next Door . To her immense relief, I was interested in the psychology of the criminal rather than the crime itself. Although neuroscience is my primary interest, I also hope to learn more about the intersection between law and medicine at the UPenn College of Arts and Sciences. I’ve been able to explore this topic through various projects at school such as presentations on juvenile crime and the death penalty.

At the University of Pennsylvania, I look forward to taking classes like Forensic Neuroscience (BIBB 050) as well as Neuroscience and Society (PSYC 247) both of which directly combine my two interests. Hopefully, the Take Your Professor to Dinner program resumes as I would make sure to talk to Dr. Daniel Langleben about his research on forensic functional brain imaging over a meal of Philly cheesesteaks.

I also hope to participate in the Race, Science, and Society Program where I can discover how race biases and neuroscience go hand-in-hand and contribute to the fight against racism. The Beyond Arrests: Re-Thinking Systematic-Oppression Group immediately caught my attention while looking at Penn’s opportunities to engage in relevant dialogue. My fascination with the criminal system began with reading Fyodor Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment , and Penn will both fuel that curiosity as well as introduce new questions about the world of justice reform.

As an eight-year Latin scholar and a five-time reader of the Percy Jackson franchise, I would like to take classes in the Penn Classical Studies department where I can learn more about the impact of ancient cultures on society today. Classes such as Greek and Roman Medicine (CLST 271) would intersect my interests in medicine and classical civilizations.

Although I do harbor a deep love for Philly cheesesteaks and enjoyment of running in strange places like the Woodlands Cemetery, the range of programs to support my diverse interests and unmatched opportunities to put learning into action make me confident that the University of Pennsylvania is the best university for me to succeed.

The real strength in the essay lies in the sheer number of details this student is able to include in a short space, without sacrificing style and flow. The first two paragraphs really have nothing to do with Penn, but the inclusion of them makes this response feel like an essay, rather than a list of offerings at Penn. Striking the balance is important, and the anecdote at the beginning ultimately humanizes the writer.

From the three unique courses to the specific professor and his research to the race and criminal justice programs, this student has clearly done their homework on Penn! The key to this essay’s success isn’t just mentioning the offerings at Penn that excite the student, but the context that explains how each opportunity fits into the student’s academic interests.

Adding book titles like Crime and Punishment and Percy Jackson to support their passion for the criminal justice system and classics are extra details that help us learn more about how this student pursues their passions outside of the classroom. Finding little ways to humanize yourself throughout the essay can take it from good to great.

One area of improvement for this essay is the structure. It follows a very traditional “ Why This College? ” framework—start with an anecdote, then discuss classes, and then extracurriculars and programs—that gets old quickly for admissions officers.

A great way to add some spice to the format would be to use a sample schedule for the day. This essay mentions three different classes, two different groups, and a Take Your Professor to Dinner opportunity. Together, that’s the recipe for a full day at UPenn!

There are a few ways to play around with an essay that follows a typical day-in-the-life. Maybe each paragraph starts with a time and explains what they do during that hour. Maybe they narrate walking through campus on their way from one class to the next and what they just learned. However they choose to go about it, adding in a playful spin to the traditional essay structure is one of the best ways to instantly set an essay apart from the crowd. 

Essay Example #3: UW Madison

Prompt: Tell us why you decided to apply to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. In addition, please include why you are interested in studying the major(s) you have selected. If you selected undecided, please describe your areas of possible academic interest. (650 words)

Essay – # Day 117

7:30 am… As I open my eyes, I look at the pinboard in front of my bed. Written in red block letters are two of the many goals of my life: “Make life better and more independent for the Visually impaired; Inspire kids to explore the field of STEM, making them the future problem solvers.“

Keeping these goals afresh in mind, I freshen up and prepare for the first class of the day, ​ECE 533 Image Processing. As the professor explains the Applications of Image Processing in Computer Vision, a light bulb sparks in my mind. I can modify the head contraption of PERIPHIS to identify objects in peripheral vision and alert the wearer via an earpiece using Text to Speech (TTS). 

After the class, I see Professor Mohit Gupta at the WISION Lab, where he shares his insights from the Block World Cameras system, which helps to geometrize 3D Man-made environments. We brainstorm ways we can implement this system on PERIPHIS.

Deep in the discussion and intrigued by my curiosity, he asked me where my interest in this niche field sparked during high school, and then I recount the incident from 9th grade: 

“In Hindi – Agar aaj mere paas paise hote to ye din na dekhna padta” (If I had money, I would not have had to see this day.) 

These were the words of Aadiya, a glaucoma patient, who couldn’t help but cry in despair as she injured herself in an accident just because she couldn’t sense the incoming traffic. During my visit to “Baroda Association for Blind (BAB)” for a survey, I saw and experienced firsthand how hard and inaccessible it is for an underprivileged visually impaired to locomote without anyone’s assistance. 

What happened next was my first adventure into the world of Computer Science and Engineering. I dedicated the next four years to find an affordable solution to a pressing problem. It was called PERIPHIS, a smart wearable that helps alert the visually impaired wearer of impending danger while locomoting.

When I finally presented this device to Aadiya, the smile on her face made me realize how big an impact technology can make in one’s life.

11:00 am… As I head to the Engineering Hall to complete my assignments of COMP SCI 570

Introduction to Human-Computer Interaction, I crossways with my roommate from the Chadbourne Residential College, who is also interested in researching applications of Computer Vision in real life. We fix a time to chat later. 

1:20pm… After a quick bite, I head to Human-Computer Interaction Laboratory. I expand my knowledge on different applications of Computer Science to make human life better than I found. I get fascinated when I see a few students building a child-friendly humanoid robot to teach kids the principles of Coding and AI. I hop in and share insights from my experience of being the President at AiGoLearning and kindling interest in STEM for young children. I explain how crucial the UI is when it comes to technology for the young.

5:00pm… To blow off some steam and socialize, I meet up with my fellow countrymen and artists at the Indian Graduate Students’ Association. We discuss and plan the upcoming Diwali Night Music at Shannon Hall. I feel proud to share my national identity while bringing out my musical self by contributing as a Tabla player at the student organization. 

As I close my day, I reflect and think of the most unique resource at UW. It is not the labs, research facilities, classes, but the people, including the professors and students, all aligned to a single goal: “Solving problems to make society a better place.”

10:00pm… I find my way back to my dorm room and write with red block letters on my pinboard: “Meet with at least 1 Badger every day and gain new insight from them.”

This essay is a stellar example. The day in the life formatting is a common way to spice up your “Why This College?” essay, but the way this writer executes it is nearly flawless.

Opening with the vision board makes the student’s college goals clear from the very start, and this was cleverly done since vision boards are naturally one of the first things you see when you wake up.

The student then takes us to specific courses and labs and shares their thoughts on how they could improve their invention, PERIPHIS. The author seamlessly includes background information on PERIPHIS by including this hypothetical conversation with a professor who speaks their native language.

As we go through the day, we can see that this student will not only be involved academically, but also socially. We learn how important their culture is to them and how they plan to share it with the campus community.

This essay does everything a “Why This College?” essay should: it shares the student’s goals and motivations behind them, how the university can support those goals, and how the student will engage with the campus beyond academics.

There’s not much this essay could improve, besides a few formatting and wording issues. The first line of this essay—“ Essay – # Day 117”—is a great attention-grabber, but the placement of the # symbol is confusing and perhaps should’ve been in front of the number.

There are also a couple spots where wording is a bit awkward, such as these lines:

I crossways with my roommate from the Chadbourne Residential College, who is also interested in researching applications of Computer Vision in real life. We fix a time to chat later. 

It should instead say something like “I run into my roommate” and “We schedule a time”. This is likely due to English not being the student’s native language, but could’ve easily been caught by proofreading from a native speaker.

Essay Example #4: Northwestern

Prompt: While other parts of your application give us a sense of who you are, we are also excited to hear more about how you see yourself engaging with the larger Northwestern community.

In 300 words or less, help us understand how you might engage specific resources, opportunities, and/or communities here. We are curious about what these specifics are, as well as how they may enrich your time at Northwestern and beyond.

For as long as I can remember, I have seen my parents, both farmers, struggling to produce food because of the challenges presented by the environment. Joining Northwestern’s community, and majoring in Environmental Engineering, will allow me to understand what are the reasons behind climate change and learn how to stop them and/or prevent them from happening. 

Having witnessed how plant diseases affect crops, I would like to collaborate in the PLANT-Dx project and in its widespread application. I strongly believe that it will be able to help farmers to improve the quality and quantity of their production, and reduce famine around the world. At some point in my education, I want to take advantage of the study-abroad programs Northwestern has to offer and learn about farming practices in a different part of the world. In addition, I want to conduct research on sustainable alternative farming methods that adapt to the new environmental conditions and that can be practiced in countries with fewer resources.

Apart from having access to outstanding professors, rigorous academics, and cutting-edge research resources, I will be able to be part of a close-knit community genuinely curious about others’ activities, truly passionate about what they do, and not afraid to step out of their comfort zone to make of this world a better place. Being part of Engineers for a Sustainable World at Northwestern will allow me to get to know people that share one of my passions in addition to learning and teaching how to apply sustainable practices in daily life.  

I am already looking forward to marching through the Weber Arch.

This essay is extremely cohesive, as it focuses on the student’s agricultural background and desire to study environmental engineering. The student mentions a couple resources specific to Northwestern, such as the PLANT-Dx project and Engineers for a Sustainable World.

Because of the background information the student provided, their motivations for participating in these opportunities is also clear. We can see that Northwestern would be a school that would help them achieve their goals.

There are two main aspects of the essay that could be improved: the writing and its specificity.

To begin with, the intro paragraph is a bit clunky and vague.  The student should have specified the challenges the environment has presented to their parents’ farming with detailed imagery about droughts or torrential rain. The final sentence about climate change is also much too broad, and the student should’ve stated a goal in a smaller niche of environmentalism.

For example, here’s what a rewritten strong intro paragraph might look like:

The drought this year was bad, and the once-flourishing tomato crops on my family’s farm were afflicted with Southern Blight. As my family and our community struggled to put food on the table for the third year in a year, I resolved to major in Environmental Engineering at Northwestern to learn how to preserve our agriculture in the face of climate change.

Another writing error is the typo in the final paragraph, where they write “to make of this world a better place”. It’s important to proofread your essay and have others help you proofread as well!

Finally, while the essay mentions a couple specific Northwestern resources, the other resources they mention are too vague.  The student could’ve improved by mentioning a specific study abroad program and a current research project on sustainable alternative farming methods. Most colleges let you study abroad and conduct research, so you need to explain why Northwestern is the best place for your goals.

Essay Example #5: NYU

Prompt: We would like to know more about your interest in NYU. What motivated you to apply to NYU? Why have you applied or expressed interest in a particular campus, school, college, program, and or area of study? If you have applied to more than one, please also tell us why you are interested in these additional areas of study or campuses. We want to understand – Why NYU? (400 words)

“A futuristic way of looking at academics,” the student panelist said during a New York University virtual information session. I reflected on a conversation I had with my grandma; she couldn’t understand how her vegetarian granddaughter could build a career in the food industry. However much I tried convincing her that vegetarianism was the future, as it offers substantial benefits to the environment and can offer health benefits to a growing population with the same environmental resources, she insisted that tofu would never provide the same satiation as meat. She was raised in a community where meat consumption was embedded in the culture, and its production is a large part of the country’s economy. In contrast, I had the privilege of living a few steps from San Francisco, with many restaurants and grocery stores dedicated to plant-based meat alternatives. Trying innovative recipes and products eventually allowed me to develop my own recipes. Upon my move to Nicaragua, where my grandmother is from, I found my food options to be limited, expensive and hard to find. So I developed my own small-scale solutions that did not break the bank and satiated grandma.

An institution that implements forward-thinking is what I need to reach my goals of changing the future of plant-based diets and people’s views on vegetarianism. NYU’s Nutrition and Food Studies program offers multiple disciplines of food studies that I will apply to my aspirations as a vegetarian. I plan to study under Adjunct Faculty Kayleen St. John, whose success in the plant-based industry and her teaching of the ‘Foundations of Plant-Based Nutrition’ in The Vegetarian Times excites me. The variety of classes like Introduction to Food History, Food Photography, and Food Systems: Food & Agriculture will give me an overview of what is available in the food industry to be prepared for all fields. Not to be cliche, but NYU’s proximity to the city is essential for the rapidly changing vegetarian industry. The multiculturalism available in NYC and NYU will allow me to understand the food system and diets of various cultures, religions, and areas. I can explore the extremes of the food industry, from fancy restaurants to public school cafeterias. These juxtapositions, much like the one I experienced after my move to Nicaragua, will allow me to broaden my reach and demonstrate that the vegetarian diet is not something reserved for select groups but a diet attainable to all. 

A core strength of this essay is the fact it takes its time to provide the reader with ample background on why this student is interested in nutrition and food studies and how they have grappled with difficult questions and surrounding this topic in the past. It’s okay to not mention anything about NYU for a whole paragraph if you are using that space to bring depth to your interests and tell the reader the crucial backstory behind pursuing your intended degree.

Another positive aspect is the inclusion of New York City for a purposeful reason. NYU admissions officers read thousands of essays that just talk about living in NYC for the sake of NYC—this is not what they want to hear. In contrast, this essay focuses on the vast and lively food scene in New York that the student considers to be an invaluable asset to her NYU education. This is a time where including New York actually plays to the appeal of NYU, rather than making it seem like the student is simply applying for the city.

Finally, this student clearly demonstrates that they are someone who wants to change the world for the better, but through their personal niche. NYU is looking for people who express this desire to be a changemaker, but oftentimes sweeping statements like “I want to change the world” come across as vague and disingenuous. The essay does mention changing diets and looking to the future, but it is focused within the student’s specific area of interest, making the claim to change the world more determined and authentic.

This essay could be made stronger if there was a bit more personal reflection included. The first paragraph provides a lot of details on the student’s vegetarianism and how it conflicts with her grandmother and her heritage. What it doesn’t include very much of is how the student thinks and feels about her diet being at odds with that of her family. 

Does this student feel they are betraying their heritage by being vegetarian? What emotions do they feel when people criticize vegetarianism? Why did they go vegetarian in the first place? Probing questions like these that get to the emotional core behind the story in the first paragraph would really help to build out this student’s backstory. We want to understand what their emotional responses and reasoning processes look like, so finding ways to include those into an already expositive paragraph would further bolster this essay.

Essay Example #6: NYU

My mother never takes off her Cartier necklace that my father gave her 10 years ago on their anniversary. As a child, I didn’t fully understand this attachment. However, on my 15th birthday, my aunt gifted me a ring, which was uniquely designed and made up of three rings linked together. Wearing it every day and making sure I would never lose it, I didn’t treat it like my easily replaceable childhood necklaces; it was my piece of luxury. This sparked my deep curiosity for the luxury world. The niche strives to provide the finest and most memorable experiences, as equally as my Japanese attention to detail and my French appreciation towards aesthetic beauty. In a constantly shifting environment, I learned that luxury chases timeless excellence.

NYU Stern’s BS in business and a co-concentration in management and marketing will fully immerse me in the business side of luxury fashion that I aim to pursue a future career in. The luxury marketing track, offered only by NYU, will enable me to assemble the most suited classes to reflect my interests. Specifically, NYU Stern’s exciting electives such as The Dynamics of the Fashion Industry seminar and Brand Strategy & Planning will encourage me to develop the skills that I was introduced to and grew keen on when running a virtual sustainable fashion auction.

As someone who has moved around from Paris to Tokyo, to Chicago and now Athens, I thrive in meeting and collaborating with others from diverse backgrounds. The school’s strong global outlook, demonstrated through Stern’s International Business Exchange Program, further sets NYU apart for me, as it is crucial to building essential soft skills. This opportunity allows me to experience new cultural approaches to luxury business which I can bring back with me to New York, and therefore push me to become a well-rounded business student. Similarly, I am excited to take part in the array of student clubs offered, such as the Luxury and Retail Association (LARA), which I learned about after connecting with and talking to current students. Seeing past talks from employers of companies like Conde Nast, I am eager to learn outside of the classroom from future speakers. 

Finding myself in new situations constantly, I always seek new challenges and explorations – to me, it is clear that NYU Stern will push me to create the finest and most unique learning experiences of timeless excellence.

This essay has an amazing introduction paragraph. It doesn’t mention anything about NYU or what this student is planning on studying, which is what makes it so intriguing. The reader doesn’t know where this student is headed after making such a seemingly unrelated statement about jewelry, but we want to find out. 

Not only does this essay immediately capture the reader’s attention, it maintains a succinct and direct tone that helps the reader effortlessly flow from one paragraph to the next. The student chose to include three opportunities at NYU that excite them and fully elaborate on them. This serves as an excellent example of more is less. 

We aren’t bombarded with a laundry list of classes, professors, and clubs the student wants to take. Instead, the student took a focused approach and described why they were excited by each offering they highlighted. Going deeper into a smaller number of opportunities at the college still shows this student did their research, but it allows for their backstory and goals to be discussed in far greater detail.

While this student does a good job of elaborating, they also mention a few key aspects of their personality as throw-away lines, when it would have been great to elaborate further on them. For example, they mention running a virtual sustainable fashion auction (cool!), but don’t provide us with any details on what that actually entails, how they got involved with it, what they enjoyed about it, etc. They also mention moving around a lot in the context of developing a diverse perspective, but they don’t include any emotional insight into what that was like.

Although there are only 400 words available, and you don’t want to spend too much time discussing the past, it would be nice to see just a sentence or two that delves into the details of this student’s background. The fashion auction and moving around clearly had an impact on the student, so we want to know what that was. If they are choosing to include these details, they must be important in the student’s decision to pursue business at NYU, so they shouldn’t be afraid to divulge the emotional significance to the reader.

Essay Example #7: Boston University

Prompt: In no more than 250 words, please tell us why BU is a good fit for you and what specifically has led you to apply for admission.

Boston University’s College of Arts and Sciences (CAS) attracts me because of its support of interdisciplinary study among its wide array of majors. In fact, the CAS now offers a course that combines biology, chemistry, and neuroscience. As I hope to conduct medical research into brain disorders, I plan to pursue all three areas of study. These cross-disciplinary connections at BU will prepare me to do so.

CAS’s undergraduate research program would allow me to work with a mentor, such as Dr. Alice Cronin-Golomb or Dr. Robert M.G. Reinhart related to their research on neurological disorders. With them, I can advance the work I have already completed related to Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). In a summer class at our local university, my partner and I extracted data from fMRI and PET studies and inputted them into a coding program. We then created an indicator map, which we imported into another software program, AFNI, to display significant activity in the brain regions affected by DID. Seeing the representation of our data thrilled me because I knew it could eventually help people who live with DID. I want to experience that feeling again. Successfully analyzing these fMRI and PET studies and learning to code drives me to pursue more research opportunities, and this desire motivates me to study at a university that offers research opportunities to undergraduates. BU’s interdisciplinary approach to psychology and support for independent undergraduate research will optimally prepare me for a career as a neurological researcher.

This student clearly outlines BU-specific resources (the interdisciplinary course and undergrad research program), plus how these resources align with their professional goals (to become a neurological researcher). They do name professors, but since their work clearly relates to the student’s interests, it doesn’t look disingenuous, and shows that the student has done research on their fit with BU. The student also provides background on why they want to pursue research, and shows that they already have experience, which makes their interest in the undergrad research program more concrete.

The only thing missing from this essay is the student’s fit with BU in terms of extracurriculars and social life. “Why This College?” essays should also cover extracurriculars, as colleges are also interested in how you’ll contribute to their community. 

In general, these essays should be academic-leaning (especially if they’re under 250 words), but you should still address some social aspects of the college that appeal to you (we recommend about 70% academics, 30% social, with more or less focus on social aspects depending on the word count). 

Since the student probably already detailed their previous research in their Common App activities section, they could’ve just summarized their research background in one sentence (instead of 78 words, which is 31% of the total word count!), and used that valuable space to talk about a specific social aspect of BU that interests them. 

Essay Example #8: Boston University

Prompt: In no more than 250 words, please tell us why BU is a good fit for you and what specifically has led you to apply for admission. 

I am fascinated by research, though completely uninterested in the disciplines traditionally associated with it, such as STEM fields. I need to find a school that will balance my desire to conduct research with my interest in political science. 

While many schools boast in-depth student research programs for those looking to cure diseases or develop solutions to global warming, few tout their support for humanities research. Additionally, many universities that do allocate funding to social science research typically reserve these monies for graduate students or upperclassmen. BU, with the help of its Undergraduate Research Opportunities Program, will allow me to conduct research on the topics that most intrigue me, such as gender disparity in politics, or the relationship between dominant parties in power and the country’s economy and involvement in foreign affairs. Furthermore, I can begin these studies as early as my first year. Not only can I take classes with professors like Sandra McEvoy or Dino Christenson to develop my interests in a classroom setting, but I could also work with one of them to develop new knowledge in the topics that we both enjoy learning about. With this knowledge base and experience conducting studies with top professors in a respected research institution, I will be well-prepared for my future law career. I want to learn in an environment that encourages independent study no matter one’s field of interest or experience, and BU’s support of intellectual curiosity for all of its students makes it a perfect fit for me.

This student knows exactly what they want, and they’re not afraid to state it bluntly. Their intro paragraph is totally honest about their interests (or lack of interest), and we immediately understand one of their main college goals: to conduct political science research.

The student mentions a specific resource, the Undergraduate Research Opportunities Program, as well as an alignment with BU’s value of encouraging independent study in all fields. Showing alignment with a specific value of the university is a great way to take your essay to the next level.

This essay shows us that the student would be a great fit for BU and would take advantage of its research opportunities.

The writer mentions some of their research interests, but doesn’t explain the motivation behind them. We don’t actually learn very much about the student themself, which is a common flaw of “Why This College?” essays. The essay would’ve been stronger if they’d explained why they’re interested in “gender disparity in politics, or the relationship between dominant parties in power and the country’s economy and involvement in foreign affairs.” For example, maybe they feel strongly about abortion rights and are upset about the way men have been legislating women’s rights.

The student also names two professors whose classes they’d like to take and with whom they’d like to do research, but we aren’t told which classes they’re interested in, or which topics they could cover together. You want to avoid “name-dropping” professors without context in your essay. If the student shared the names of specific classes or research topics and why they’re interested in them, that would’ve strengthened their essay.

Essay Example #9: Tufts

Prompt: Why Tufts? (100 words) 

When Deanne, Tufts’ admissions counselor, visited my school, she immediately caught my attention by emphasizing Tufts’ diverse yet unified campus. Tufts’ inclusive definition of diversity goes beyond merely recruiting students from a variety of backgrounds. Tufts seeks to integrate these categories of diversity and pushes its students to learn from one another. One such intersectional program that attracts me is CAFE (Conversation, Action, Faith, and Education). By joining CAFE, a community that promotes interfaith education, I will learn from my peers, become more understanding of other religious backgrounds, and apply this broader understanding to my academic work at Tufts.

It’s hard to write a “Why This College?” essay in 100 words. This essay does a good job sticking to one unique element of Tufts—its intersectionality. Since Tufts also cares about demonstrated interest, it’s great that the student also mentioned speaking with an admissions counselor. 

We unfortunately don’t learn very much about the student from this essay. Why do they care about diversity and interfaith programs? How does this relate to their academic and career goals? While the word count is super short, they could’ve cut these lines and jumped right into the specific resource they’re interested in: Tufts’ inclusive definition of diversity goes beyond merely recruiting students from a variety of backgrounds. Tufts seeks to integrate these categories of diversity and pushes its students to learn from one another.

Here’s an example of a stronger version of this essay:

When a Tufts admissions counselor visited my school, she immediately caught my attention by emphasizing Tufts’ diverse yet unified campus. As a Muslim hoping to go into International Relations, I want to attend a school that not only recruits diverse students, but pushes them to learn from one another. I hope to join intersectional programs such as CAFE (Conversation, Action, Faith, and Education). By joining this community that promotes interfaith education, I will gain the necessary perspective and compassion to become a human rights lawyer in countries with religious conflict, such as my homeland Azerbaijan.

Essay Example #10: Tufts

Prompt: Why Tufts? (100 words)

Someday I hope to conduct medical research in developing countries; Tufts attracts me because of its wide array of majors it offers and support for undergraduate research. To understand the human brain, I hope to study biology, neuroscience, and psychology. In addition to outstanding faculty in each of these areas, Tufts also organizes initiatives including the International Research Program. Through this program, I would work with other students and faculty members on an international project related to brain diseases. This opportunity will give me a taste of my future career and help me narrow the scope of my later studies.

This essay does a better job of sharing the student’s goals with us compared to the previous Tufts essay. We learn that the applicant is interested in medical research in developing countries on brain diseases, and that Tufts has a program to support international research.

The essay still mentions some resources that could apply to many schools, which is not an effective use of the tiny word count. For example, they say: “Tufts attracts me because of its wide array of majors it offers and support for undergraduate research” and they mention the “outstanding faculty” in the fields they plan to study.

They also don’t tell us their motivation behind studying brain diseases abroad, and it feels like there’s a significant story there. Giving some background would’ve further strengthened their essay.

Finally, they mention that they still need to narrow the scope of their studies; while it’s fine to be undecided on your career and majors, you don’t need to spend your precious word count saying that in your essay. They could’ve instead shared a couple potential avenues they’re considering.

Here’s what the student could’ve written instead:

Outcomes for schizophrenia patients are better in developing countries than in developed ones. I hope to research the reasons behind this and improve the treatment options in the US for the cousin I grew up with. In college, I want to study biology, neuroscience, and psychology. Tufts attracts me because of its unique interdisciplinary BS in Cognitive and Brain Science and its International Research Program. Through this program, I could do the research I’ve dreamt of doing with a faculty member and other students, preparing me for my future career as either a researcher or clinician.

Essay Example #11: Georgia Tech

Prompt: Why do you want to study your chosen major specifically at Georgia Tech? (300 words)

Climate change is a human rights issue.  

There the headline was, screaming on my phone screen. I think about those suffering from a lack of clean water. I think about those suffering from a lack of clean air. 

I often think back to that headline – it’s what drives my passion for environmental engineering. As an environmental engineer, I can mitigate air pollution and design water treatment systems that address the water injustices that people face. However, it’s not just about creating a technology that cleans water; it’s about changing people’s lives. New technologies can make a lasting difference in humanitarian issues worldwide; Georgia Tech’s research on creating a toilet that turns human waste into clean water for those in need of improved sanitation aligns perfectly with my interests.   

At Georgia Tech, through the student-led organization, Engineers for a Sustainable World and the InVenture Prize, I can translate the knowledge gained from my classes into a concrete vision. I can design and implement hands-on sustainability projects around Atlanta and invent a water sanitation system for the on-site acquisition of clean water. 

Georgia Tech can also provide me with ample research opportunities, such as the broad area of Healthy Communities in the School of Civil and Environmental Engineering. I can further pursue my interest in developing solutions to deliver clean water while welcoming new areas of inquiry. An area I would like to explore would be the controlling of dangerous matter in the air to reduce health hazards; reducing the impact of climate change is of utmost importance to me. 

Studying environmental engineering at Georgia Tech would well prepare me to develop solutions to climate-related issues. With the countless opportunities that Georgia Tech has to offer, I know there is nowhere else where I can receive a better environmental engineering education.

What the Essay Did Well l

This essay begins with an attention-grabbing statement that leaves the reader wondering how this will relate to the student’s interest in Georgia Tech. They then transition seamlessly into how climate change and human rights motivate their desire to become an environmental engineer.

The student mentions several resources specific to Georgia Tech that would help them achieve their goals, such as the research on the toilet turning waste into water, Engineers for a Sustainable World, InVenture Prize, and Healthy Communities research. It’s clear that they did their research and have reflected on their fit with the campus community.

They end the essay explicitly stating that Georgia Tech is the best place for them to grow, and the reader is certainly convinced of this by the end.

This essay is quite strong, so there’s not much that the student could’ve improved. That said, there is one sentence that is a bit awkwardly worded: New technologies can make a lasting difference in humanitarian issues worldwide; Georgia Tech’s research on creating a toilet that turns human waste into clean water for those in need of improved sanitation aligns perfectly with my interests.

Instead, the student could’ve written:

New technologies can make a lasting difference in humanitarian issues worldwide; Georgia Tech aligns with this value of mine and is even developing a toilet that turns human waste into clean water for those who need improved sanitation.

Essay Example #12: Georgia Tech

From my first Java project, a somewhat primitive graphing calculator, I realized that CS unlocks a different way of thinking. My brain races at speeds it seldom touches with other subjects. Every part of CS, from conceptualizing a plan to executing a solution, is another piece of a puzzle I’m eager to solve and affords the most opportunities for creative problem-solving and application. 

“Progress and Service,” Georgia Tech’s motto, tells me there’s no better place to explore my curiosity and deepen my CS skills while simultaneously helping make the world a better place, my ultimate goal for a college education. 

In the classroom, I look forward to GT’s threads program, where I can tailor the curriculum to suit my career choice after exposing myself to all technical aspects of CS.

I’ll apply my specialized learning with Tech’s fascinating research opportunities. Professor Pandarinth’s brain-machine interfacing software means a lot to me. My uncle passed away from a freak accident after extensive paralysis because potential treatments were unaffordable. Exploring this revolutionary brain decoding software wouldn’t just involve me in cutting-edge artificial intelligence technology research, I’d be personally driven to ensure its success and accessibility. 

I’m at my best building towards tangible results. I learned this on my robotics team using design skills to create a technically complex robot that tackles anything from shooting balls to hanging on a balance beam. I’m excited to expand my skills on the RoboJackets team, applying my career interests to build ferocious BattleBots and autonomous race robots that compete on the Indy Speedway, two events that sound ridiculously fun. 

Of course, I can’t skip hackathons. These competitions molded my interest in coding so I want to give back to Georgia Tech’s Hack-Community by planning HackGT and the Catalyst Mentorship program as a member of the Hexlabs team. 

The student’s passion for CS shines through this essay. They explain what they love about the subject (the problem-solving aspect) and they share that they hope to make a difference through CS, demonstrating alignment with Tech’s motto of  “progress and service”.

It’s clear that this student has done their research, mentioning specific academic programs, research, and clubs. We can see that they’d be greatly engaged with the campus community.

Finally, this essay is also down-to-earth. The student doesn’t try to use impressive vocabulary or formal language. In fact, they even describe some extracurriculars as “ridiculously fun.” While you shouldn’t get too informal in your essays, this student’s casual tone in this context makes them feel more approachable and more excited about the prospect of going to Georgia Tech.

This essay has a couple sentences that are confusing to read:

Every part of CS, from conceptualizing a plan to executing a solution, is another piece of a puzzle I’m eager to solve and affords the most opportunities for creative problem-solving and application.

This sentence could’ve been broken up and rewritten as:

Every part of CS, from conceptualizing a plan to executing a solution, is another piece of a puzzle I’m eager to solve. For me, the field affords the most opportunities for creative problem-solving and application.

This sentence also uses incorrect grammar—the comma should be replaced with a semicolon:

Exploring this revolutionary brain decoding software wouldn’t just involve me in cutting-edge artificial intelligence technology research, I’d be personally driven to ensure its success and accessibility. 

These details would make the essay more readable.

The organization of the essay could also be reworked. The student mentions Tech’s motto of “progress and service,” but doesn’t follow up until later with an example of how they’d use CS for the greater good. Using CS for social good isn’t ultimately the theme of their essay, so this section would’ve been better placed at the end of the paragraph about AI technology research, or at the very end of the essay. The essay actually ends abruptly, so placing the section at the end might’ve tied it up nicely, if the student could’ve placed more emphasis on how they plan to use CS to improve society.

Do you want feedback on your “Why This College” essays? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

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