example of personal statement for leadership

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35 Examples of Personal Leadership Statements

Leadership is a key component of success in any field. There are many different types of leaders, and the type of leader that you are will depend on the situation.

Therefore, we could all use some inspiration and personal leadership statements can help you find your own unique way of leading. Below are 35 examples of personal leadership statements to help get you started.

What are Personal Leadership Statements?

A personal leadership statement is a reflection of what inspires and motivates an individual to lead. It focuses on the personal belief system from which an individual draws their leadership philosophies, values, and skills.

It is not so much a definition of who they are as a leader, but more of a tool that can be used to determine how they personally approach leadership roles and the responsibilities which come along with them.

Great leaders know themselves well and having a clear personal leadership statement can help any leader align their objectives with their values and motivations. Developing a strong statement will serve leaders in all aspects of life - both personal and professional - as it allows them to stay true to who they are while remaining responsive to changing trends in the world around them.

1. I will persevere and strive for excellence in all that I do, no matter the obstacles that may arise.

2. I will lead with integrity and courage, setting an example for others to follow.

3. I will be a role model for those around me, inspiring them to reach their full potential.

4. I will listen to the ideas and opinions of others without prejudice or judgement.

5. I will inspire people with my enthusiasm and passion for success.

6. I will strive to create an environment where everyone is respected and included.

7. I will use my power and influence for the greater good of all involved.

8. I will encourage open dialogue and collaboration amongst my team members.

9. I will strive to develop relationships based on trust, respect, and understanding with those that I lead.

10. I will be an example of innovation, creativity, and resilience.

11. I will be an active listener and advocate for those around me.

12. I will use my knowledge and experience to create solutions to difficult problems.

13. I will strive to embrace change and innovation in all that I do.

14. I will work hard to create a culture of trust and collaboration in my team.

15. I will be an advocate for positive change and growth within my organization.

16. I take ownership of my actions and decisions, and strive to learn and grow from my mistakes.

17. I prioritize open communication and actively seek out feedback to continuously improve.

18. I am accountable for the success of my team and take responsibility for their development.

19. I prioritize building meaningful relationships and strive to establish trust and respect with those around me.

20. I will lead from the front and foster an environment of trust, respect, collaboration, and innovation in all my endeavors.

21. I will use my knowledge and experience to motivate others to reach their goals.

22. I will strive for clarity when communicating with my team members, ensuring that everyone understands their roles and responsibilities.

23. I will be a reliable source of support and guidance, helping my team members to succeed.

24. I will create an environment of trust and collaboration by treating everyone with respect.

25. I will take accountability for the decisions that I make and strive to learn from them.

26. I will lead by example, showing others that I am committed to my work and the success of our team.

27. I will use my influence to create a positive and empowering culture for those around me.

28. I will strive to develop strong relationships with other leaders in order to collaborate and grow together.

29. I will inspire others to reach their highest potential by setting a clear vision and providing support along the way.

30. I will use my strengths and abilities to empower those around me and help them achieve success.

31. I will be an advocate for positive change, pushing for new ideas and creative solutions within my team.

32. I will strive to create an environment of collaboration, innovation, and healthy competition.

33. I will be open-minded when it comes to making decisions, taking into consideration the opinions of all those involved.

34. I will lead with empathy and understanding while remaining steadfast in my commitment to excellence.

35. I will always seek out opportunities to develop myself and those around me.

The Importance of Having a Personal Leadership Statement

Having a personal leadership statement is an essential part of leadership, helping to define the values that frame and guide your actions.

It communicates to other people, what you believe your purpose as a leader is and how you identify yourself in terms of leading others.

This statement can be valuable when it comes to making decisions or responding situations, as it reminds us who we are and why we do the things we do. It can also help build trust among leaders, peers, and subordinates as it reinforces our commitment to living out our values daily.

Ultimately, a personal leadership statement not only captures your identity as a leader, but serves an invaluable reminder for all future decisions and experiences.

These personal leadership statements can serve as a reminder to stay true to yourself and the values that you believe in. By creating your own individual leadership statement, you can set yourself apart from others and make sure that your voice is heard. Leadership is an important skill to have, and these examples can help you get started on the path to becoming an effective leader .

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How to Write a Leadership Statement (With 40 Examples)

A leadership statement is essential to help contribute to the organization’s success. However, it may be challenging to come up with the right words to create an impact.

What should the statement emphasize? What should be included?

According to experts, here are the key points that you need to consider when writing a leadership statement:

Loic Bellet

Business English Coach, Speak Proper English

Discuss what you will do differently due to what you’ve learned about leadership and yourself

Consider what attributes make someone an excellent leader before crafting your statement.

The ability to motivate others, moral dignity, plus placing a high value on connections with team members are all examples of leadership qualities and skills. What outstanding leadership traits do you possess?

Before you start drafting your statement:

• Make a list.
• Go over your word list again and pick one , maybe two of these attributes to emphasize .
• As it pertains to the trait you choose, provide your assessment of what makes somebody a great leader.

It should be no more than one to two sentences in length. This definition will serve as the foundation for your argument.

Implement a strategy

It all boils down to implementing a strategy when writing a decent statement. Your blueprint is that plan. One of the most crucial advantages of a decent outline is that your statement will be well arranged and easy to follow.

You can use the paragraph structure for a leadership statement or add more paragraphs if you want. This is what your outline might look like:

• Introduction . Captivate the reader’s attention by defining good leadership in terms of the attribute you’ve chosen.
• Paragraphs in the body . Give some history on anecdotes and explain why a leadership characteristic is essential to you and how you live your life according to this value.
• Conclusion . Finish with a strong declaration about your ability to lead.

Grab the reader’s attention and distinguish your assertion from the rest

The beginning of your leadership statement must be strong. This is where you grab the reader’s attention and distinguish your assertion from the rest.

Related: How to Be (more) Assertive

A personal anecdote is the greatest method to do this.

Consider the leadership quality you’ve chosen. When was the last time you showed this characteristic in your life?

Consider a period when your integrity was put to the test in a leadership role if you’re writing about it. Perhaps you were the director of your high school newspaper and felt compelled to expose the identity of a confidential source.

To draw the reader’s attention, describe the scenario in dramatic detail in one or two sentences. Explain why you believe this leadership attribute is crucial after those two phrases. This will serve as a transition into your statement’s body.

Focus on the leadership traits you possess

Focus on the leadership traits you possess in the body of your statement and how they relate to the tale you began to explain in the introduction. You can order your statement however you choose, but here’s a tried and tested method.

Provide some background information

Give some context to your narrative by providing some background information.

Give some information regarding your work as editor if you opened your statement by mentioning being forced to reveal the source of a journalistic piece.

• What method did you use to obtain it?
• What did you consider to be the most significant aspect of this role?

Concentrate on a leadership attribute you already have

Return the attention to leadership. Make sure you’re concentrating on a leadership attribute you already have. You must select a quality that is directly relevant to the anecdote you are presenting.

You may bring the attention back to integrity in the case of the editor being pressed to reveal sources.

• What is the significance of integrity?
• What makes someone an effective leader if they have integrity?

Related: 24 Best Leadership Books of All Time

Make sure your conclusion leaves a lasting impression

Another crucial component of the leadership statement is your conclusion. These are the words that will leave the most lasting impression on your reader about your leadership and writing ability. This is an important aspect of your statement, so make it count.

• Return to the strong leadership while personalizing it.
• Describe how your leadership aligns with your principles and how you displayed leadership in one or two sentences in a specific case.
• Discuss what you’ve learned.
• Finish with a powerful sentence.

What will you do differently in the future due to what you’ve learned about leadership and yourself? To make your words even more powerful, use a parallel framework.

Founder and CEO, Gibson Hill PC

A leadership statement is vital for setting out the expectations and goals of the business and laying out the core values that employees are expected to follow and respect. Also, it is all about getting employees on board so that they understand what the company aims to do for them , getting them invested in the success.

After all, a leadership statement is all about leading, and that requires gathering a team to lead.

Here are some of the things that you should remember when writing a leadership statement:

Talk about core values of your business

Your business should have clear core values that are implemented within the work methodology, and it is essential that, as a leader, you talk about them so that they can be in effect.

Talk about the reason for the company and what it aims to do, and talk about the values and ideals that you uphold and that you expect everyone to respect.

Outline concrete goals

As a leader, it is your job to create guidelines and direct your employees. Having concrete goals is necessary, not only so that the business can grow but also so that employees have a direction to develop and grow.

Set out expectations, and then provide the tools to make them achievable.

Introduce ways of measuring progress

Measuring progress should be about monitoring that things are on track so that you can implement solutions or extra support where needed.

You must address this early on so that it isn’t something for your employees to dread.

Make it relevant to the employees

I’ve read a few leadership statements that are all about the company’s aims and how the leader will be going about things, with no mention as to how it will all affect the employees, and that is a huge mistake.

You want your employees to feel involved and become invested , and this means making sure that the goals you set in place are related to them in some way.

Be your company’s “hype-man”

This is my top recommendation for leadership statements; they should be positive and full of motivation , almost as if you’re selling the idea of the business to your employees to get them excited about the overall success that can be achieved.

Martin Lassen

Founder & CEO, GrammarHow

A “leadership statement” is a written statement outlining your leadership philosophy and the qualities you believe are necessary to lead effectively.

• Your leadership statement must be brief and easy to understand.
• It’s important to express your thoughts on the theory of leadership , and the traits and abilities you believe are necessary for success.
• Discuss your personal leadership experiences and how you’ve developed your own unique management style.

Here are some suggestions for writing a leadership statement that represents your values:

Share your experiences to help them understand your leadership style

Your leadership statement should contain your own leadership experiences .

• What obstacles have you overcome?
• What victories have you had?
• What have you learned?

Sharing your experiences can assist readers in understanding your leadership style and why you think it works.

“Leaders in the military and business have taught me that success involves vision, planning, and execution. I am continuously looking for new challenges and methods to strengthen my leadership skills. This attitude has aided my career and personal success.”

Share concrete examples that demonstrate your leadership ideas

Remember to be genuine and honest in your leadership statement. If you don’t agree with someone’s ideas or ideals, don’t write or avoid clichés and generalizations; instead, share concrete examples that demonstrate your leadership ideas.

“Leaders must constantly put their followers first. They should be open to hearing and understanding their problems. A smart leader knows that success requires a team dedicated to the same goal.”

CEO, Champion Leadership Group LLC

Analyze the characteristics that differentiate a successful leader

Prepare your leadership statement by analyzing the characteristics that differentiate a successful leader before you sit down and write.

Among these leadership traits and talents are:

• The willingness to encourage others
• Personal integrity
• The ability to place a high emphasis on interpersonal connections with team members

Are there any outstanding leadership characteristics you possess?

Here is one helpful tip on how to write a leadership statement:

A solid opening to a leadership statement is critical

This is where you grab the reader’s attention and set your writing out from the others— a personal narrative is the most significant way to go about this.

Consider the quality of leadership you’ve decided to emphasize. Is there a time when you displayed this trait in your life?

For instance, when writing on personal integrity, imagine a period when your integrity was put to the test while serving in a leadership position. For maximum effect, explain the incident in one or two sentences in dramatic detail to capture the reader’s attention.

Afterward, explain why this leadership quality is so crucial to you—this will serve as a bridge from the introduction to the body of your statement.

Jonathan R. Brockman

Trial Attorney, Jonathan R. Brockman, P.C.

Include your attitude and the attitude that you expect from your team

A vision or leadership statement is one that allows you to define yourself and your role when leading your team—it’s something that you can always look back to if you find yourself going through the motions and in need of reminding why you’re doing what you’re doing .

It is also something that I think is useful to provide for new or potential employees so that they can get a feel for your priorities.

The way you need to craft a leadership statement depends on you and your values: do you want to exemplify your goals or your values more?

Either way, you need to keep your statement concise , don’t mince your words, even if you’re trying to be poetic. You’ll want to include your attitude and the attitude that you expect from your team and how you’ll promote and encourage that attitude.

If you can squeeze all of this into 3-4 sentences , you’ll have a great vision statement.

Gerald Lombardo 

Co-Founder, The Word Counter

Your daily actions should reflect the qualities you added in your leadership statement

A powerful leadership statement highlights your internal understanding of why you’re doing what you’re doing. It’s intricately tied to your values , hopes , and worldview and is important because it’s what matters to you.

As the leader of an organization, your daily actions should reflect the qualities that you have included in a leadership statement.

The best way to begin crafting a leadership statement stems from a deep look into yourself as a leader. You need to think back on your own career as though you are retired and ask yourself questions such as:

• What do you want your peers to have said about you?
• How did you make your coworkers and subordinates feel on a daily basis?
• What are some goals you wish you accomplished?
• How would you have led your organization differently?

Ultimately, a leadership statement guides you during times of rapid change within your organization because it provides you with a course of action. It’s your roadmap to understanding how you define yourself as a leader.

By understanding why you’re doing what you’re doing as a leader, your team will take notice and feel confident in supporting your vision.

Travis Lindemoen

Managing Director, Nexus IT Group

Figure out how to be the best leader possible

One of the most critical aspects of leadership is establishing a group dynamic where everyone is working toward the same goal .

Self-reflection and divergent thinking are essential components of effective leadership. Every step of the way, a leader should keep an eye on the big picture while also acknowledging the small victories along the way.

Leadership does not equate to power, and the two are not synonymous. Leaders challenge themselves to take on the role of a change agent, challenge the status quo of business and society, and act as role models for others.

“ Aspiring to be that leader who can inspire and motivate others to lead healthy and balanced lives is something I strive for . In my presence, I hope to convey the impression that I care about establishing relationships with others and unquestionably lift them up, and inspire self-direction.

I intend to lead from the ground up to promote a positive work environment and establish my authority as a leader. Personal and socially responsible leadership is something I believe in, and I will constantly evaluate my attitude and actions to see if they are in line with this belief and ignite positive social change.

Leadership means valuing the contributions of others, including their perspectives, as well as what they can offer toward our common goal.

I will lead with concrete goals and clear communication among my followers as we work together to achieve our shared vision and leave a lasting impression on every person we come into contact with.”

Related: Top 7 Leading Traits of Good Leaders

Austin J. Franklin

CEO and Co-founder, Good-Natured Life

The statement should positively impact you and everyone you lead

A leadership statement is a personal mantra created to guide one’s leadership philosophy. This idea is similar to a company mission statement, except it abides only by you and your leadership style.

A leadership statement is essential because it holds you accountable and guides your decision-making.

For example, my leadership statement revolves around a few words:

“Make a positive difference & remain good-natured.”

These are core ideas that have helped me produce a successful enterprise. Focusing on making a positive difference and remaining good-natured affects how I lead staff, interact with customers, and develop services/products.

Regardless of the decisions needed to be made or conflicts that can arise, I can choose the right course of action by reflecting upon my personal leadership statement.

A leadership statement should be:

• The leadership statement should be easy to memorize.
• Understand what is needed to help you effectively lead your employees and organization.
• The leadership statement should guide you in every circumstance you face as a leader.

By following the three guidelines, you will be able to develop a strong leadership statement. This statement will positively impact you and everyone you lead, so create thoughtfully.

Daniel Cook

Director HR , Mullen and Mullen

Link your values and beliefs to the plans that you are proposing

You should brainstorm what you have to write about in your leadership statement.

Firstly, you need to note down your beliefs and values that shape your personality and can appeal to your audience as well. You need to think of characteristics that you might have that would encourage other people.

Secondly, to make your audience understand your personality, you can name your role models and what is their most inspiring trait that appeals to you.

Thirdly, try linking your values and beliefs to the plans or actions that you are proposing . Ensure that it is a direct link that people can easily understand.

Lastly, after explaining your expectations, you can discuss the expectations that you might have from your audience or the general public.

“In order to ensure your leadership is effective, you need to have open communication with everyone. Due to this, I would like to hear honest feedback from my employees.”

James Chapman

Operations Manager, BELLA Bathrooms

It should mention the leader’s actual game plan to materialize the goal

In a modern business setup, with more importance given to teamwork, the concept of leadership is seen as one of the most important aspects of business success.

Business owners and managers are expected to be strong leaders where they have a clear goal and accurate pathways to achieve them. In these situations, a leadership statement can help a business leader in proving his case to business success among his subordinates.

A leadership statement should clearly mention the leader’s vision, his role in the organization, his purpose to achieve his vision, and his actual game plan to materialize the goal.

At our company, we have a mission as a team to serve our customers with high-quality bathroom solutions through the e-commerce platform.

I would like to mention a quote from my leadership statement as an example :

“A low-cost bathroom can look fantastic if its good quality and a designer suite can look atrocious if you are paying for the name rather than the quality of the materials”.

CEO and Founder, Freedom Care

Your statement must be ideal

A leadership statement is a concise and definitive description of your values and goals as a leader, both in what you want to achieve and how you want to treat the people you lead.

Before writing your leadership statement, it is important to realize that your statement is your ideal. This means that on a day-to-day basis, you might slip up and treat people in a way that is not according to your statement.

This does not make you a hypocrite; it makes you human .

The purpose of a leadership statement is to orient you, your values, and your goals as a leader.

In your leadership statement, you should include your responsibilities to the people as a leader:

• What you believe you need to be for them,
• The overarching values that drive you,
• Your goals as a leader, and
• How all these things all come together to form an overall approach, attitude, and perspective.

“As a leader, it is my responsibility to ensure that every team member has the necessary tools and environment to succeed. I need to be approachable, professional, personable, and expressive. To foster a productive team, I need to express gratitude and trust.”

Magda Klimkiewicz

Senior HR Business Partner, Zety

Capture your purpose as a leader

Writing a leadership statement isn’t easy. To capture your core values and beliefs, goals, and purpose as a leader in a few simple sentences is a challenging task that requires a fair amount of thought, time, and self-discovery.

It might still be worth it, as an effective leadership statement can help you remain focused , prioritize , stay true to your purpose , and inspire others . This serves as a reminder about who you are as a leader.

An excellent way to determine who you want to be in the leadership role is to think about influential figures that made an impact throughout the history of business and the world. Do some research on leaders who inspire you and determine what motivates them and how they lead.

While I don’t advise copying or following their personal statements, it can be a helpful exercise to identify which of their core values, beliefs, and actions resonate with you the most. Build on that by deciding how they translate into your current role.

Here are two sample leadership statement examples:

• “I believe that innovation is what drives excellence. I will use positive feedback and encouragement to inspire my team to create revolutionary solutions to improve people’s lives.”
• “As a leader, I am committed to making our company a place of inclusion and equality. I will create a positive and supportive environment where employees can thrive and reach their fullest potential.”

Harriet Chan

Co-founder and Marketing Director, CocoFinder

Talk about what you believe makes you an effective leader

A good leadership statement can help you stand out from the crowd in a job application or interview. It can also be a valuable tool for developing your own personal leadership style.

The following tips will help you write a strong leadership statement.

• For example, “I led a team of 10 software engineers and successfully delivered a new software product on time and under budget.”
• For example, “I am passionate about delivering results, and I always put the needs of my team first. I am motivated by the challenge of solving difficult problems.”
• For example, “I led my team through a difficult merger and successfully integrated the two teams into one cohesive unit.”
• For example, “I was recently recognized as the top leader in my industry by The Wall Street Journal.”
• For example, “I am looking for an opportunity to lead a team and make a real impact on the world. I believe I have the potential to be an excellent leader, and I am excited to pursue my career aspirations.”

Yosun Allen

CEO, Yosun UV Printer

Statements made by leaders should have meaning

An organization’s activity should have a clear sense of direction if its mission statement is to accomplish that goal. In order to attract and encourage employees, an organization’s purpose statement must be clear and concise .

It’s easier for people to be motivated, devoted, and pleased if they have a purpose in their work.

A statement of leadership must be unambiguous

People in an organization will not be motivated unless they have a clear understanding of the goal. It’s best to keep it short and sweet.

Only the most important aspects of the organization should be highlighted, and nothing else should be. It’s easier for individuals to grasp how they can help when the goal is clear.

“Our vision is to be the earth’s most customer-centric company; to build a place where people can come to find and discover anything they might want to buy online.” — Amazon

Co-founder and CEO , Power

Be concise with the wording

The statement shouldn’t be too long, and the sentences should be short and crisp so that they are easy to understand.

So, for example, “I will create a casual working environment in which employees are allowed to conduct themselves in a fun manner so as to strengthen the team bonds and create a better culture for the company, all while encouraging efficiency in the performance of duties.”

You can say something like, “I aim to create a fun yet efficient working environment, with a strong focus on teamwork.”

It’s a lot simpler , and it will get the point across better.

Choose words that motivate and engage

You want your statement to inspire your employees in some way so that they are motivated and engaged, and the best way to do this is through the correct wording.

I recommend using words such as “ potential ,” “ success ,” “ development ,” “ growth ,” and similar. Basically, you want to give everything an air of positivity and career advancement.

Make sure you talk about things your employees care about

Talking about the company’s goals is all good, but you need to make it relevant to your employees. How are your goals and plans going to affect them? You must get them invested in success because a business only thrives through teamwork .

Related: 30+ Real Life Examples of Teamwork

Adam Crossling

Marketing Manager, Zenzero

Get to know the why of the company

To write your leadership vision statement, the first thing you need to do is figure out why a company is there. Overall, the answer to this question will help a leader see the future they want for their business.

It’s hard for people and businesses to say why they do what they do. Simon Sinek says this in his best-selling book, Start with Why . I mean your goal, cause, or belief when I say “ why ,” but you can also say “ what .”

We like leaders and groups that are good at telling us what they believe. One way they can inspire us is by making us feel like we belong, are safe, and not alone. When a leader explains why they do what they do, they get people who are loyal and want to help make their vision for the future come true.

Find out why you do what you do:

• How did you start the business or become a manager in the first place?
• Consider what kind of movement you want to start that leads to a better future.
• Getting to the heart of why your business should support your chosen cause or project.
• Reflecting on how your business can make people feel like they belong and are part of a group.
• Ideating about how your company’s purpose and your customers’ purpose might work together.

Theola Tinny

Co-Founder, VinPit

Be sure people understand what your organization stands for

Here are some tips that I keep in mind while drafting a compelling leadership statement.

• Be clear and straightforward. You want to be sure people understand what your organization stands for exactly.
• Make it personal. Your leadership statement should reflect who you are as a leader.
• Instead, use what you have already established in your organization, whether the values or mission statements.
• Make it creative . Consider including elements like to-dos , specials , or other helpful information that goes beyond just being about your business.
• Use action verbs. When writing your leadership statement, avoid using negative words like “don’t,” “don’t change,” and “don’t do this.”

“We will take the time to listen and understand one another, appreciate each other’s diverse backgrounds and beliefs, form friendships, and nurture them wherever they are found.”

Robin Antill

Director, Leisure Buildings

Outline objectives – they should be realistic and achievable within a given time frame

When a leader is crafting a statement, they should consider what goals they tend to achieve in the long run. Your goals as a leader should be specific , which means that they should be realistic and easy to achieve within a given time frame.

Once set, these objectives should be measured against time. This measure will help you determine your performance and identify any bottlenecks.

“I will develop a purpose-driven connection with my employees working in hybrid and remote environments. Through this measure, I aim to unlock the full potential of my team so that our business can voyage towards a journey of success.

I tend to incorporate the ideas of empathy and positivity at the workplace, which can help promote a culture of inclusivity.”

Tim Davidson

President, Car Title Loan Lenders

Make sure it has quantitative goals

It’s often good to have a list of goals you should and would like to attain as a leader when creating a leadership statement.

To get the most out of this section, use the SMART method to meet your objectives: Having defined and measurable goals makes it easier to concentrate on how to achieve them. It is impossible to attain your objectives if you cannot track your progress.

As a result, make sure your personal leadership statement has quantitative goals.

Your leadership statement will inevitably alter as you mature as a person and your goals shift. Because of this, you’ll need to update your statement over time to match your current objectives. To assist you in prioritizing your task, make sure your goal has a definite deadline.

“It is hard to reach the pinnacles of what the corporation can do without a solid team. As the leader, I will focus on establishing a good and healthy workplace culture that encourages everyone to reach their full potential.”

Annesha Basu

Chief Managing Officer, Stand Up Paddle Boards Review

You have to address what others are worried about in a leadership statement

A leadership statement has to inform and inspire equally . Self-assess and identify the core values that make you the leader you are.

Everyone has roughly the same goals; as a leader, there must have been something differently you’ve done that made you fit to lead. Identify the behaviors and traits that helped you get results.

You have to address what others are worried about in a leadership statement. This will change as your audience changes.

Understanding what your audience is worried about will help you know what to say. If you’re addressing:

• Beginners – you have to instill confidence in them and lay any fears they may have to rest.
• An experienced audience – your speech needs to be along the lines of growing expertise and income .

Omer Usanmaz

CEO and Co-Founder, Qooper Mentoring & Learning Software

Keep your statement inspiring, representing who you are as a leader

A leadership statement is a declaration of your beliefs and values as a leader. It can be used to introduce yourself to others or remind yourself of what you stand for when things get tough.

To write a leadership statement:

• Start by thinking about what you believe in and what values are important to you.
• Write down a few sentences that express your beliefs and values clearly and concisely.
• Keep your statement positive and inspiring , and make sure it represents who you are as a leader.

A leadership statement doesn’t have to be complicated. In fact, a good example can be something as simple as the following:

“As a leader, I am always looking for ways to improve my team’s performance. Whether through coaching and mentoring or providing support and resources, I am committed to helping my team reach its goals.”

“I strive to create a positive and productive work environment where my team can thrive, so I always encourage open communication and feedback. This helps me maintain a clear understanding of my team’s needs.”

“I believe in setting clear expectations and providing regular feedback so that my team knows what is expected of them. I also recognize and reward good performance so that my team knows that their hard work is appreciated. “

Kimberly Silva

CEO, Find People First

Keep in mind what you want to convey

Effective leadership statement meets the needs of people who are reading it. It may contain elements that make the statement easy for a person to read, such as an example or personal story.

Writing a leadership statement is a job interview’s first impression. It’s essential to have a concise, compelling statement summarizing your leadership skills, interests, and accomplishments.

There are also times when a leadership statement emphasizes specific skills and abilities or provides information that is particularly relevant to the person reading it. To have a compelling statement, keep in mind what you want to convey , who you are talking to, and how you want to be perceived .

“Due to the success of my leadership at ABC Company, I have opportunities to head up new departments and lead diverse teams, from strategy and finance to customer service. I take calculated risks and work hard to ensure my team members can give 110% commitment.”

“I am a strong believer in developing my employees. I empower them to grow in their skills, take on more responsibility and contribute more broadly to the company.”

“I believe that people are the key to our success, and therefore it is my responsibility to create an environment where they can thrive. I’m a results-driven leader with a proven track record of developing and managing teams in the SaaS industry.”

“I have experience launching, managing, and marketing products, as well as designing and implementing pricing models. I have strong analytical skills, deep technical knowledge, and excellent interpersonal skills .”

Related: What are Interpersonal Skills & How to Improve Them

Steve Scott

Chief Technology Officer, Spreadsheet Planet

Develop a list of your fundamental principles and prioritize them

I would advise that before you go into drafting your statement, review a few sample personal statements and observe how the writers highlighted their leadership priorities and beliefs.

Most leaders have grandiose plans but fail to articulate why they aspire to accomplish their objectives. As a result, this lack of clarity impacts the leader and instills confusion throughout the business.

It is better to develop a list of all your fundamental principles and prioritize them.

Therefore, before creating your personal leadership statement, determine your fundamental goal as a leader to steer your employers in the appropriate route.

“Without a strong team, it is impossible to accomplish the organization’s full potential. As a leader, I will focus on establishing a good and healthy work culture that encourages everyone to reach their full potential.”

Daniel Foley

Marketing & SEO Specialist, Emma Sleep

Every statement represents your current aims and values

Remember that there are no wrong answers when creating a personal leadership statement.

Every statement is unique to each individual and represents your current aims and values. Your account would evolve, depending on your development and changing perspectives on leadership.

• Your attitude towards leadership

Another important aspect of your leadership statement is how you describe and see your role as a leader .

• Your behavior as a leader

With their values and demeanor, a good leader can guide others. As a result, these skills are critical in your actions to achieve your leadership objectives.

Even though the work may appear complicated, there are numerous leadership statement examples to refer to if you’re having trouble figuring out how to include these elements into your statement.

• Understanding your core purpose as a leader

Before writing your statement, look through some sample personal statements to see how other people have highlighted their leadership priorities and values.

It’s preferable to make a list that focuses on your key principles and then rank them in order of priority .

Most leaders have lofty plans, but they don’t explain why they want to achieve them. As a result, the lack of a defined purpose has an impact on the leader and confuses the business.

So, before you write your leadership statement, find out what you want to accomplish as a leader to steer your company in the right direction.

Karl Tippins

Editor-in-Chief, Age Holdings

Allow ideas to flow freely

My advice when crafting a leadership statement is to visualize the future.

Create a list of the essential components of your vision statement. To begin, grab a piece of paper or visit a whiteboard and jot down any terms that spring to mind when you consider the company’s future.

When brainstorming, avoid tailoring your thoughts; instead, allow ideas to flow freely. Dare to fantasize about achieving challenging goals as your firm expands.

Additionally, zero in on notions that strike a chord with you and attempt to picture the details. The more precise the visualization of your dreams, the stronger the flashlight that will guide you in the proper direction.

Frequently Asked Questions

How often should i update my leadership statement .

Your leadership statement should reflect your current goals and values as a leader. As you gain new experiences and insights, it’s important to review and update your statement so that it accurately reflects your evolving leadership philosophy.

As a general rule of thumb, you should review and update your leadership statement at least once a year. However, you may also want to update it more frequently if your role changes significantly or you reach important milestones.

By keeping your statement up to date, you can ensure that it remains relevant and meaningful to support your leadership decisions and inspire others.

What should I do if I’m struggling to write my leadership statement?

Break it down:   Try tackling your leadership statement into smaller parts to make it more manageable.

Use a framework:   A “ What, How, Why ” framework can help you organize your thoughts and capture all the critical aspects of your leadership style.

Solicit feedback:   Share your explanation with colleagues, mentors, or friends and consider their suggestions for improvement.

Be authentic:   Write from the heart and stay true to yourself to build trust and credibility as a leader. Seek help when needed:  Consider working with a professional writing or coaching service for guidance and support.

Reflect on your leadership experiences:   Think about your successes and failures, strengths and weaknesses, and the values and principles that guide your leadership style.

Should my leadership statement focus on short-term or long-term goals?

The answer to whether your leadership statement should focus on short-term or long-term goals isn’t black and white. It depends on several factors in which you write your statement and your leadership style.

Here are some things you should consider:

Context:  Your leadership statement should be tailored to the context in which you’re writing it. If you’re applying for a new job, you should focus more on short-term goals and show that you can make an immediate impact.

If you’re writing your statement for an established team or organization, you should focus more on long-term goals that align with the company’s vision and values.

Leadership style:  Some leaders focus on quick wins and immediate improvements, while others take a more strategic and long-term view. Your statement should reflect your unique leadership style and values.

Balance:  Your statement should strike a balance between the two. It’s essential to have a clear vision for the future, but it’s also important to address the immediate needs of your team or organization. Set specific short- and long-term goals that align with your leadership vision and values.

Flexibility:  As a leader, being flexible and adaptable is important. While it’s important to have goals and a clear vision, circumstances can change quickly. Ensure that your statement allows for adjustments to short-term and long-term goals.

By considering these factors, you can create a statement that effectively communicates your leadership philosophy and inspires others to follow your lead.

How can I tailor my leadership statement to a specific audience?

To tailor your leadership statement to a specific audience, first consider who it’s intended for. Consider what values or goals are important to this group and sense how your message may resonate with them.

You may need to adjust the language or tone of your statement to better appeal to the target audience.

For example, if you’re speaking to a team of engineers, you may want to focus on technical or problem-solving skills in your leadership statement. If you’re speaking to a board of directors, you might want to emphasize financial results or strategic planning.

Also, consider using examples or stories that are relevant to your audience. This can help make your message more vivid and memorable.

What is effective leadership, in simple words?

Effective leadership is the ability to inspire and motivate others toward a common goal. This includes setting a clear direction and vision, communicating effectively, and creating a positive and inclusive work environment.

Effective leaders lead by example and empower others to contribute to the success of the team or organization. They demonstrate empathy, respect, and integrity in their actions and decisions.

In simple words, effective leadership means bringing out the best in others and achieving success through collaboration and shared values.

Can anyone write a leadership statement?

Yes, anyone can write a leadership statement. A leadership statement is a personal reflection of your values, beliefs, and vision as a leader. No special qualifications or training are required to write them.

However, writing an effective leadership statement that truly inspires and motivates others requires some practice and self-reflection. It’s essential to take the time to understand your values and goals and how they align with those of your organization.

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How to Write a Strong Personal Statement

• Ruth Gotian
• Ushma S. Neill

A few adjustments can get your application noticed.

Whether applying for a summer internship, a professional development opportunity, such as a Fulbright, an executive MBA program, or a senior leadership development course, a personal statement threads the ideas of your CV, and is longer and has a different tone and purpose than a traditional cover letter. A few adjustments to your personal statement can get your application noticed by the reviewer.

• Make sure you’re writing what they want to hear. Most organizations that offer a fellowship or internship are using the experience as a pipeline: It’s smart to spend 10 weeks and $15,000 on someone before committing five years and $300,000. Rarely are the organizations being charitable or altruistic, so align your stated goals with theirs
• Know when to bury the lead, and when to get to the point. It’s hard to paint a picture and explain your motivations in 200 words, but if you have two pages, give the reader a story arc or ease into your point by setting the scene.
• Recognize that the reviewer will be reading your statement subjectively, meaning you’re being assessed on unknowable criteria. Most people on evaluation committees are reading for whether or not you’re interesting. Stated differently, do they want to go out to dinner with you to hear more? Write it so that the person reading it wants to hear more.
• Address the elephant in the room (if there is one). Maybe your grades weren’t great in core courses, or perhaps you’ve never worked in the field you’re applying to. Make sure to address the deficiency rather than hoping the reader ignores it because they won’t. A few sentences suffice. Deficiencies do not need to be the cornerstone of the application.

At multiple points in your life, you will need to take action to transition from where you are to where you want to be. This process is layered and time-consuming, and getting yourself to stand out among the masses is an arduous but not impossible task. Having a polished resume that explains what you’ve done is the common first step. But, when an application asks for it, a personal statement can add color and depth to your list of accomplishments. It moves you from a one-dimensional indistinguishable candidate to someone with drive, interest, and nuance.

• Ruth Gotian is the chief learning officer and associate professor of education in anesthesiology at Weill Cornell Medicine in New York City, and the author of The Success Factor and Financial Times Guide to Mentoring . She was named the #1 emerging management thinker by Thinkers50. You can access her free list of conversation starters and test your mentoring impact . RuthGotian
• Ushma S. Neill is the Vice President, Scientific Education & Training at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York City. She runs several summer internships and is involved with the NYC Marshall Scholar Selection Committee. ushmaneill

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Digital Marketing Strategies

How to Write a Leadership Statement

Online Business and Entrepreneurship / August 2, 2023 by Lori Ballen / Leave a Comment

This website contains affiliate links and offers that benefit Lori Ballen with no additional cost to you.

Imagine having a compass that not only directs your leadership journey but also aligns your team with your vision, values, and approach. This powerful tool is a leadership statement. It’s a dynamic document that captures your unique leadership philosophy and the critical skills you believe are essential for effective leadership. Leveraging this document, you can seamlessly orient new team members, enlighten stakeholders about your management style, and provide a robust framework for your personal growth as a leader. It’s more than just a statement; it’s your leadership identity penned down to inspire and guide.

Table of Contents

When writing your leadership statement, it is important to be clear and concise. Your statement should highlight your beliefs about the fundamental nature of leadership and the skills and traits you think are essential for success. You may also want to discuss your own experiences as a leader and how you have developed your own approach to management.

Here is an example:

[I believe that leadership is about servanthood. It is not about being in charge or having the most power but about using your position to help others reach their goals. I think the key skills for a leader are empathy, communication, and problem-solving. I have found that listening to others and considering their feedback is essential for building trust and creating successful teams. I also believe that it is crucial to adapt to changing circumstances and be proactive in addressing problems before they become too big.]

When drafting your leadership statement, remember to be authentic and honest. This document should reflect your own beliefs and values, not those of someone else. Be sure

The following tips can help you write a leadership statement that reflects your beliefs and values:

1. Define Leadership

The first step in writing a leadership statement is to define what you believe leadership is. What are the essential qualities of a good leader? What do you think the primary purpose of leadership is? Once you clearly understand what leadership is, you can start outlining your beliefs about it.

Example of leadership defined:

Leadership is the ability to inspire others to achieve a common goal. A good leader must be able to empathize with their followers, communicate effectively, and problem-solve collaboratively.

2. Outline Your Philosophy

Your leadership statement should express your personal philosophy on leadership. What do you believe are the most important skills and traits for a leader to possess? What is your management style? How do you approach problem-solving? Defining your personal philosophy will help you articulate your beliefs about leadership clearly and concisely.

I believe that the most important skills for a leader are the ability to motivate and inspire others, think strategically, and make sound decisions under pressure. My management style is based on trust and collaboration. I approach problem-solving by considering all possible solutions and choosing the best one based on the situation and the team’s abilities.

3. Discuss Your Experiences

Your leadership statement should also include a discussion of your own experiences as a leader. What challenges have you faced? What successes have you achieved? What lessons have you learned along the way? Sharing your experiences will help readers understand how you developed your approach to leadership and why you believe it is effective.

“I have been a leader in both the military and the business world, and I have learned that success requires a combination of vision, planning, and execution. I am always looking for ways to improve my skills as a leader, and I am constantly seeking new challenges. I believe that this approach has helped me achieve success in both my professional and personal life.”

4. Be Concise

A leadership statement should be brief and to the point. You don’t need to include every detail about your beliefs or experiences; a few succinct paragraphs will suffice. Keep in mind that your statement will likely be read by a variety of people, so it is important to communicate your ideas clearly and effectively.

As a leader, I am committed to creating a safe and welcoming environment for all members of my team. I believe that every individual deserves the opportunity to reach their full potential, and I will work tirelessly to support them in achieving their goals. I am also passionate about encouraging creativity and innovation, and I believe that these are essential ingredients for success in any organization.

5. Be Authentic

When drafting your leadership statement, remember to be authentic and honest. This document should reflect your own beliefs and values, not those of someone else. Be sure to avoid clichés and generalizations; instead, focus on sharing specific examples that illustrate your beliefs about leadership.

“I believe that a leader should always put their followers first. They should be willing to listen to their concerns and understand their point of view. A good leader understands that the key to success is building a team that is committed to the same goal.”

5. Edit Carefully

Once you have written your leadership statement, take the time to edit it carefully. Make sure that all of your points are clear and that there is a logical flow to your argument. Check for grammar and spelling errors, and make sure that the tone of your statement is appropriate for its intended audience.

The best way to edit your leadership statement is to get someone else to look at it. Ask a friend, family member, or teacher to read it over and give you feedback. They can help you make sure your statement is clear, concise, and error-free.

Use Grammarly to check for spelling, grammar errors , and improve your sentence structure.

6. Practice Makes Perfect

Once you have written and edited your leadership statement, it is important to practice reading it aloud. This will help you to ensure that your ideas are communicated clearly and effectively. It is also a good idea to practice with different audiences. You may want to try reading your statement in front of a small group of friends or family members, or you may want to give a presentation about your leadership beliefs to a larger audience.

No matter who you are speaking to, it is important to be prepared and to practice your presentation ahead of time. This will help ensure that your message is communicated effectively and that you make a positive impression on your audience.

Now that you know how to write a leadership statement, it’s time to get started! The best way to get started is to brainstorm some of your beliefs about leadership. Once you have a list of ideas, start drafting your statement. Be sure to edit it carefully and practice reading it aloud. With a little bit of hard work, you can create a leadership statement that will impress your audience.

What is a Leadership Statement?

A leadership statement, also known as a leadership philosophy, is a clear and concise manifesto that illustrates your leadership qualities, beliefs, values, and ideals as a leader. It reflects your leadership style and gives an overview of how you manage or intend to manage and lead teams.

Why is a Leadership Statement Important?

A leadership statement is important because it not only guides your actions and behaviors as a leader but also communicates your leadership style to your team. This clarity helps to build trust and understanding between you and your team members. Moreover, it helps to maintain consistency in your leadership, ensuring everyone knows what to expect and can work smoothly under your guidance.

How to Start Writing a Leadership Statement?

Begin by brainstorming and reflecting on your leadership experiences, values, behavior, and motivations. Think about the leaders you admire and identify what qualities they have that resonate with you. Consider the feedback you’ve received in past leadership roles, and assess what methods have worked well and what areas need improvement. All these reflections will serve as a basis for writing your leadership statement.

How Often Should a Leadership Statement be Revised?

Your leadership statement should include your core leadership values, your definition of success, your communication style, your approach to decision-making, your beliefs about motivation, how you handle conflict, and the expectations you have from your team. However, remember to keep it concise and focused.

Can a Leadership Statement be too long?

Yes, a leadership statement can be too long. Your statement should be concise and to the point. Typically, a leadership statement should not be more than two pages. If it is significantly longer, consider revising to focus solely on the key points of your leadership philosophy

How is a Leadership Statement different from a Leadership Vision?

While a leadership statement delves into your values, style, and approach as a leader, a leadership vision is more about the future. It encapsulates your long-term goals and aspirations for your team or organization, supplying the bigger picture for where you want to lead your team or organization in the future. Both are crucial parts of effective leadership, with one focusing on the ‘how’ (leadership statement) and the other on the ‘where’ (leadership vision).

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What is a Personal Leadership Statement?

Apr 23, 2024

A personal leadership statement is an important exercise in self-knowledge that clarifies a leader’s purpose, values, and beliefs about who they are as a leader and how they lead others.  The process begins with identifying the core experiences and role models that have influenced their leadership. When finished, this statement helps leaders be more congruent, aligned with their core values and principles, and reflective of how others see them in their leadership role.

That Vision Thing

Most executives I know are skilled at the ‘we’ vision – that which inspires an organization, major donors or investors, and stakeholders . They’ve helped create it, they live and breathe it, and are truly accomplished at galvanizing others around that ‘we’ vision. In fact, no smart leader would consider developing a strategic or business plan without having this in place first.

Yet few leaders have clarified their personal leadership statement (PLS). Which makes me wonder – if leaders consider the ‘we’ vision vital to organizational success, why don’t they think it’s equally vital to have one for themselves? I’m not sure there’s a good answer to this question.  What I do know is developing a personal leadership statement is an important exercise in self-knowledge.  Having one is something that separates great leaders from mediocre ones. It’s why my coaching clients develop one during their coaching program with me.

Why is a Personal Leadership Statement important?

It’s a strategic message that clarifies a leader’s purpose, values, and beliefs about who they are as a leader and how they lead others. A personal leadership statement helps you:

• Be more congruent , aligned with your core values and principles.
• Show up in influencing moments as who you really are – not who you think you should be as a leader.
• Be more intentional  in your leadership.
• Build more trust and respect between you and your team.

What do you believe about leadership?

When I first ask this question, typically my clients can’t answer it. Or, they stumble through an answer and discover they don’t have much clarity because they haven’t given it much consideration. When leaders answer this question, they articulate their core purpose and values , their intentions and expectations , as well as something very authentic about who they are . Their leadership vision becomes an anchor for their leadership credibility.

How to develop your Personal Leadership Statement

There are several ways to develop your personal leadership statement .  You can draw or collage it.  When I work with clients, I use a process that combines journaling with visual techniques. I’ve learned that many clients find it helpful to write down their ideas first, then think them ‘out loud’.  Because the way we write and the way we speak is different – and ultimately, you want to share your PLS with others . Finally, I help clients embody their PLS. What I mean by this is that you have to demonstrate  ‘who you are’ as a leader through your physical body. When a client is ready for this step, we have a coaching session or two with horses .  I am consistently amazed and delighted at how the experience of speaking your vision while leading a horse truly helps people embody what is important to them, peel away what is not, and claim their leadership presence.

Questions to get you started

Below are some of the questions I ask clients as part of the PLS process.  Few can answer them off the top of their heads and often find it a challenge. They often discover that the answers to these questions inevitably generate more questions, require a great deal of thought, and yield, in the end, rich and varied answers.

• What is your core purpose as a leader? Why are you here, doing what you do? Why would anyone want to be led by you?
• Who are your leadership role models and what did you learn from them? Who is your inspiration? What three or four critical events in your life shaped your beliefs about leadership? What do you know to be true about exceptional leaders?
• What do you believe about leading and motivating people? What values and principles are reflected in your plans, decisions, and actions when leading others?
• What can people expect from you? What are your intentions and commitments? How do you set an example?
• What do you expect from your people?

Personal leadership statement example

Hadley Morrow started coaching with me after they were first promoted to a management position. Finding their leadership voice was important to Hadley, so we worked on their personal leadership vision statement. One of the great things about Hadley’s statement is its flexibility . Hadley can work with the whole document or use sections of the document, depending on the setting. For example, Hadley may tell their whole story when speaking at Rotary. When onboarding new staff, they may use Purpose and Values, What I Expect From You, or What You Can Expect From Me. Recently, Hadley was promoted to Director of Equity and Engagement at Better Health Together . Read their Personal leadership statement.

Do you have a personal leadership statement? 

If so, I hope you’ll share it with me and with others. If not, give me a call at  (425) 488-7747 . I’m offering a special PLS package to new clients. In six sessions , you’ll have clarity and focus around your core leadership purpose, values, expectations, and commitments.

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Leadership Personal Statement Example

by Talha Omer, MBA, M.Eng., Harvard & Cornell Grad

In personal statement prompts.

Graduate schools, especially Business schools, require prospective applicants to write an essay exhibiting their leadership capabilities. The leadership personal statement aims to know about the candidate’s ability to lead and manage others.

While writing this essay, you must provide a real example where you demonstrated leadership and, as a result, made an impact and created value. A good leadership personal statement should also discuss any challenges you faced as a leader and what you learned from that experience. This essay helps admissions committees see whether you align with the graduate school’s core values and principles.

Here is an example of a leadership personal statement that helped the applicant get into top business schools in the US.

Sample Leadership Personal Statement for Graduate School

I initiated a project named  ‘Lightening up the Lives’   to provide cheap power for households of the country’s biggest slum – the Nagasi colony, having 20,000+ minorities living without electricity. The low-income level of the colony dwellers left them without access to government-supplied electrical connections, which had high installation costs and tariffs. Additionally, the residents could not borrow from conventional banks without any collateral. Living in the heart of the country, the irony of their helplessness triggered the desire in me to create meaningful change in their lives.

I realized that solar energy could solve these people’s problems, given ample sunlight availability and lower installation costs. So I approached First Electric (Pvt) Ltd, the largest solar panel supplier in the world, for support on a pilot project. But the management’s risk averseness due to no collateral on offer became a stumbling block.

I proposed a customized microfinance strategy that made First Electric’s management more confident. First, I proposed leveraging community trust and referrals. Once people offered to finance started paying, new people were provided the funding that directly correlated with the number of new invitations. This way, the financed people had pressure from the colony to pay on time to avail of new financing.

I soon realized the limitation of this strategy as it would take years to lighten up the whole slum. I then approached different NGOs and other possible financing channels to fast-track the process. Despite being given cold shoulders by more than 20 such organizations, I found a ray of hope with USAID. USAID was initially unwilling to participate in the project due to politico-legal reasons. However, after multiple meetings with the management, I convinced them to do a pilot project. I connected USAID to First Electric, negotiated discounted offers for the panels, and with the initial USAID grant, I was able to provide solar panels to 250+ families within six months.

It was a challenging time that tested my patience and resolve. However, I learned creative problem-solving with my never-say-die attitude, which helped me face rejection. I also learned the power of effective communication and how teamwork can achieve higher goals.

The happiness I created in the lives of people who had given up hope of having electricity in their homes is a proud achievement. However, the recognition I received from State Minority Minister was truly humbling as he said: “You are a perfect example of courage, innovation, and determination. I do not doubt if God gives you more strength, you can change the fate of many.”

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How Good Leaders Write Leadership Statements

Table of Contents

A leadership statement is sometimes called leadership philosophy or personal leadership statement. It is a statement that helps leaders define their purpose, beliefs, role, values, and how they plan to lead others.

In other words, a leadership statement is the foundation of the entire leadership philosophy.

Leadership statements can offer significant clarity, whether you’re newly hired, a team leader, a leader of an organization, an executive, or a global brand. It offers direction and focus as you plan for the day-to-day operations and goals .

This article focuses on everything about leadership statements and includes leadership statement examples.

Why Is Purpose Important in Leadership?

Every business or nonprofit organization needs a formal set of guidelines that outline the principles and purpose of their work. Leadership statements are a formal way to demonstrate the principles and values of a leader.

As a leader, your purpose must align with the organization’s principles. Without this, there will be a conflict of interests.

How to Create a Leadership Statement

There are many writing tips to help you prepare an effective leadership statement. Let’s look at some of them and how to bring them together to create a solid personal leadership statement.

When writing a leadership statement, there are really no wrong answers. It is a statement that reflects your leadership style, and we don’t all have the same core leadership values. Thus, it differs from one person to the other and reflects your current objectives and values. 

The best personal leadership statements use the SMART approach. They are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-based.

A vague personal leadership statement makes you look unserious. It gives people the feeling that you’re out of touch with reality. Therefore, you should strive to make your statement specific.

The best leadership statements are measurable. If you can’t measure your progress, it is impossible to achieve your aims. This is why the leadership statement should include quantifiable milestones to measure progress.

You don’t write a leadership statement just to feel good about your writing skills. The goals therein must be achievable. The achievability of your goals has to do with the budget and personnel at your disposal. Creating an achievable leadership statement shows that you are a leader with self-awareness.

Putting a deadline on your leadership goals helps you prioritize your work. It also shows you have done your research and clearly understand how long it will take.

Some Leadership Statement Examples to Inspire You

We believe reading leadership statement examples from business leaders could inspire you and set you on the right path. Look at these examples.

“I will develop meaningful relationships with members of the team to encourage and inspire them to reach their full potential. Deploying empathy, positivity, and communication, I’ll create a work environment that is both fun and effective.”

“I believe that communication is a core part of effective leadership. That is why I will listen to feedback and foster honest communication between members of the team. I will lead with honesty and support my staff as we work toward our organizational and professional goals.”

Effective leadership is about understanding your purpose in the role and expressing its importance. You need to be confident in the mission that you are pursuing and the results that you want to achieve.

When you know what your purpose is, you can create a statement that grabs the attention of the readers and gets them excited to follow you. An effective leadership statement will inspire your followers.

Abir Ghenaiet

Abir is a data analyst and researcher. Among her interests are artificial intelligence, machine learning, and natural language processing. As a humanitarian and educator, she actively supports women in tech and promotes diversity.

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What is a leadership vision?

• Inspiration: It should inspire and ignite the passion of followers, instilling a sense of purpose and commitment towards achieving the vision.
• Clarity: The vision must be clear and easy to understand, leaving no room for ambiguity or confusion among team members.
• Authenticity: A compelling leadership vision reflects the leader’s genuine beliefs and values, earning trust and credibility from followers.

Leadership Vision Examples to Inspire You!

• Martin Luther King Jr.:  A prominent civil rights leader, Martin Luther King Jr.’s vision was of a future where racial equality and justice prevailed. His famous “I Have a Dream” speech articulated this vision, inspiring millions to join the civil rights movement. His unwavering commitment to nonviolent protests and his powerful words rallied people from all walks of life to fight for civil rights, leading to significant legislative changes and advancements in racial equality.
• Mahatma Gandhi:  Gandhi’s vision was of an independent India, free from British rule and oppression. His principle of nonviolent resistance, called Satyagraha, inspired Indians to stand up against the British government through civil disobedience. Gandhi’s leadership brought unity among diverse groups and galvanized the nation to work towards independence, eventually leading to India gaining freedom in 1947.
• Nelson Mandela:  Mandela’s vision was of a South Africa free from apartheid and racial discrimination. He advocated for reconciliation and forgiveness, emphasizing the importance of unity among all South Africans. His leadership during the transition to democracy and his commitment to peaceful coexistence helped establish a foundation for a more inclusive and democratic South Africa.

• Think of yourself: To find your vision, look within. Start by reflecting on your values, beliefs, and personal goals. Consider what inspires and motivates you as a leader. What do you stand for, and what do you want to achieve as a manager?
• Think of your team: In the next step, dive deeper into the goals and defining ideas of your team. What brings all of you together? What are the ultimate goals, and how do you want to achieve them? Consider the good, bad, and ugly aspects of your team. 
• Identify your values and goals: Our personal values are the bedrock of our actions. As a team, plans are central to our journey. Thus, both are critical in eventually understanding our vision. Think along these to identify what ultimately matters regarding the objectives and pathways.
• Seek inspiration and help: Not everything might be clear from the get-go, and that’s okay! You can look at examples of leaders who inspire you and who have achieved something that you wish. You can also consult your peers and coaches to develop a more well-rounded vision. 
• Craft a leadership vision statement: In the final step, it’s time to put the vision into words. A leadership vision statement summarizes the leader’s guiding ideas and goals for the team. It can also help you remember your values in tough times. While your vision continues to evolve, a written statement offers stability.

Examples of Leadership Vision Statements for Managers

“Our vision is to create a team where every individual has the opportunity to reach their full potential through innovative and inclusive leadership.” “As a team leader, my vision is to foster a culture of continuous improvement, where we embrace challenges, learn from failures, and celebrate our collective successes.”

“We strive to be a leader in our industry, driving change and growth through a commitment to excellence and a focus on customer satisfaction.” “I aspire to lead a team that embraces challenges as opportunities, believes in our collective potential, and never settles for mediocrity.”

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“Our vision is to build a sustainable future for all, where businesses and communities can thrive together in harmony with the environment.” “With a steadfast commitment to sustainability, our leadership envisions a future where businesses and communities thrive, hand in hand, fostering a harmonious coexistence with nature.”

“We aim to empower and inspire our team members to reach new heights, fostering a culture of creativity, collaboration, and continuous improvement.” “My vision as a manager is to create a collaborative and innovative team where every member feels valued, empowered, and inspired to achieve their full potential.”

“To be a leading global organization that delivers value to our customers, shareholders, and communities through innovation, operational excellence, and corporate responsibility.” “My goal as a team leader is to create a positive and nurturing work environment that encourages creativity, fosters personal growth, and promotes work-life balance.”

• “To cultivate a leadership culture that empowers individuals at all levels to embrace their potential, lead with integrity, and drive positive transformation within our organization and beyond.”
• “To create a leadership development journey that encourages self-awareness, fosters a growth mindset, and empowers our leaders to bring out the best in themselves and their teams.”
• “To create a leadership development ecosystem that fosters continuous learning, embraces diversity, and cultivates leaders who are agile, adaptable, and future-ready.”
• “We envision a leadership development program that empowers our team members to become authentic, empathetic, and purpose-driven leaders, guiding our organization towards sustainable success.”
• “Our goal is to build a leadership pipeline that identifies and nurtures emerging leaders, fostering a culture of mentorship and growth that sustains our organization’s long-term success.”

• Start with the phrase “Our vision is to…” or something similar to clarify the statement’s object.
• Clearly state the main goal or purpose of the organization or team in terms of leadership.
• Use specific and measurable language that describes the desired outcome.
• Include key themes or values that align with the leadership vision.
• End with a call to action or a commitment to get your team going.

Deeksha, with a solid educational background in human resources, bridges the gap between your goals and you with valuable insights and strategies within leadership development. Her unique perspectives, powered by voracious reading, lead to thoughtful pieces that tie conventional know-how and innovative approaches together to enable success for management professionals.

Deeksha Sharma

Bring your vision to action with strong leadership skills!

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12 Personal Statement Examples + Analysis 2024

If you’re applying to college, you’ll most likely need to write a personal statement as part of your college application. (And please note that the personal statement examples below are for undergraduate applications—if you’re trying to find grad school statement of purpose examples , please head to that link.)

But before diving into analyzing some great personal statement examples, it helps to get some context on what a personal statement actually is, and what writers should plan to include when writing their own personal statement.

What is a personal statement?

It’s the main essay required by the Common Application as well as most other application systems. They basically require you to answer some version of the question “Who are you, and what do you value?” And in recent years, the main Common Application essay has become more and more important in colleges’ decision making process, especially as many colleges are relying less and less on standardized test scores.

Why read personal statement examples?

In our work with students, we often encourage students to review examples of personal statements to get a sense of what a great essay might look like and to just generally share a wide range of topics, structures, and writing styles so that they can see what’s possible when writing this essay. In this spirit, we’re sharing 12 of our favorite examples from the past few years. We’ve also included analysis for what makes them outstanding to (hopefully) help you uplevel your own essay.

What should a personal statement include?

The personal statement should demonstrate the qualities, skills, and values that you’ve cultivated over your life and how those skills have prepared you for attending college. I (Ethan) have spent the last 15 years answering this question, which you can learn more about in my free 1-hour guide .

In our opinion, a great personal statement example has 4 qualities . After reading the essay, you can identify whether your essay or topic show each of the four qualities by asking yourself the questions below:

Values : Can you name at least 4-5 of the author’s core values? Do you detect a variety of values, or do the values repeat?

Vulnerability : Does the essay sound like it’s mostly analytical or like it’s coming from a deeper, more vulnerable place? Does it sound like the author wrote it using mostly his or her head (intellect) or his or her heart and gut? After reading the essay, do you know more about the author AND feel closer to him or her?

Insight : Can you identify at least 3-5 “so what” moments of insight in the essay? Are these moments kind of predictable, or are they truly illuminating?

Craft : Do the ideas in the essay connect in a way that is logical, but not too obvious (aka boring)? Can you tell that the essay represents a series of carefully considered choices and that the author spent a lot of time revising the essay over the course of several drafts?

Want a more thorough guide on how to write a personal statement? We’ve got you covered.

Let’s read some essays.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

• Example #1 - The Tally on My Uniform
• Example #2 - Quattro Lingue
• Example #3 - 12
• Example #4 - Flying
• Example #5 - Arab Spring in Bahrain
• Example #6 - Poop, Animals and the Environment
• Example #7 - Entoptic Phenomena
• Example #8 - The Builder & Problem Solver
• Example #10 - The Little Porch and a Dog (With Spanish Translation)
• Example #10 - Life As an Undocumented Student
• Example #11 - Umbra
• Example #12 - Angry brown girl, feminist, singer, meme lover

Personal Statement Example #1 The Tally on My Uniform

Day 19: I am using my school uniform as a slate to tally the days. As the ink slowly seeps through the fabric of my shirt, I begin to understand that being a conscious Arab comes with a cost. Flashback. Day 7: I come across a live stream on social media, 1,200 Palestinian political prisoners are on their seventh day of a hunger strike against the Israeli occupation. It is the first I have heard of its occurrence. I allow myself to follow the news daily through social media while regional mainstream media and our local news channels refrain from reporting any news of the strike. Day 13: I am engulfed by the cry for justice. I feel helplessly overwhelmed, not wanting to confront reality, but I force myself to anyway; actively searching, refreshing my phone to tune into live streams from protests, plugging in “Palestinian hunger strike” on the search engine to stay connected to the cause. Day 18: No one else seems to know anything about what is going on. I am compelled to find a way to embody the struggle. In my first period class, I see a marker beside the whiteboard. I pick it up, not sure what I’m going to do, but then hear myself asking my classmates to each draw a vertical line on my shirt. It seems funny at first--they laugh, confused. But each time the marker touches the fabric it tells a story. It is a story of occupied countries, a story in which resisting apartheid becomes synonymous with criminality, a story we refuse to address because we have grown too apathetic to value life beyond our borders. As my classmates draw the tally, together we tell the story of the hunger strike and mourn the distance human beings have created between each other. Day 20: My uniform has become a subject of question. Each pair of eyes that fix their gaze on the ink, I share the story of our Palestinian compatriots. The initial responses are the same: disbelief, followed by productive conversation on our moral responsibility to educate ourselves on the conflict. Day 28: Each day the strike continues, I have asked my classmates to draw another line on the tally. While it still comes across as unsettling, it seems to no longer represent the reality of the hunger strike. My classmates are no longer interested in what it means. I am supposed to move on already. I am called in to the principal’s office. After being instructed to get a new shirt, I choose to challenge the order. As long as the hunger strike lasts, I will continue to voice the reality of the hundreds of prisoners, in hopes of recreating the sense of responsibility I originally sensed in my peers. Day 41: A compromise deal is offered to the political prisoners and they suspend their hunger strike. I walk out of school with a clean uniform and feel whole again, but unnaturally so. I was left feeling an unspoken kind of weakness where I broke under the realisation that not all sorrows could resonate with people enough for me to expect them to lead movements. I would need to be the one to lead, to recreate the energy that the tally once inspired. I decided to found a political streetwear brand, Silla, where fashion choices transcend superficial aesthetics by spreading a substantial message of equality and donating the profits to NGOs that advocate for social change. Through Silla, I am able to stay in touch with my generation, keeping them engaged with issues because of how they can now spend their money Silla has mobilized people to voice their opinions that align with equity and equality. Because of my adherence to justice, I was elected student government president and I use it as a platform to be vigilant in reminding my peers of their potential, inspiring them to take action and be outspoken about their beliefs. When the ink seeped through the fabric of my uniform it also stained my moral fibres, and will forever remind me that I am an agent of change. — — —

Why This Essay Worked: 

Uncommon topic and uncommon connections. Overall, this is just a stand out piece. The unique story of how the author had lines drawn on her shirt pulls the reader in. But while this story is not something you’d typically find in other people’s applications, don’t feel intimidated. Having an uncommon topic makes writing a strong essay a bit easier, but by itself is not enough for a great essay. What really elevates this piece is the connections and observations that the author makes about her classmates and the school’s collective response to distant but important political conflict. The student does a great job evoking the emotional response of her peers and beautifully articulates her own indignation with the apathy that emerges. When you write your essay, consider how you can use uncommon connections to take your reader to places they may not have expected to go.

Experimental structure. One of the many cool things about this essay is its structure, which demonstrates the quality of craft . The author uses a montage structure that emphasizes numbers and chronology, two ideas that are central to the content of the piece itself. By playing with the idea of time and distance, the applicant emphasizes some of the critical ideas in her essay and shows that she’s unafraid to think outside the box. Remember, admissions officers read tons of personal statements; an uncommon structure can go a long way in setting you apart from the crowd.

Answers the question “so what?” The thing that really brings this essay home is the last paragraph. Although the story of the uniform being marked by lines for each day of the hunger strike is fascinating, we’re not totally sure of its relevance to the life of the author until she gets to that last bit. In it, she tells us about her politically-aware fashion line and her appointment as school president. This answers the question of “so what” because it shows us that she took the lessons she learned during the strike and applied it to her life outlook/practices more broadly. After you’ve written your first draft, go back through it and make sure you’ve clearly shown what you’ve done to act upon your reflections or values .

Personal Statement Example #2 Quattro Lingue

Day 1: “Labbayka Allāhumma Labbayk. Labbayk Lā Sharīka Laka Labbayk,” we chant, sweat dripping onto the wispy sand in brutal Arabian heat, as millions of us prepare to march from the rocky desert hills of Mount Arafat to the cool, flat valleys of Muzdalifa. As we make our way into the Haram, my heart shakes. Tears rolling down my cheeks, we circumvent the Ka’ba one last time before embarking on Hajj, the compulsory pilgrimage of Islam. It became the spiritual, visceral, and linguistic journey of a lifetime. Day 3: “Ureed an Aśhtareę Hijab.” “Al-harir aw al-Qathan?” “Ķhilaahuma.” “Kham ťhamanu-huma?” “Mi’at Riyal.” “La. Khizth sab’een.” “Sa’uethikhá Sab’een.” “Shukran laķ.” “Show me hijabs.” “Silk or cotton?” “Both.” “How much do these cost?” “100 Riyal.” “No. Take 70.” “Fine. Thanks Hajjah.” In Makkah, I quickly learn shopkeepers rip off foreigners, so exchanges like this, where I only have to say a few Arabic words, make me appear local. It also connects me with real locals: the Saudi Arabian pharmacist who sells me cough syrup, the Egyptian grandmother seeking directions to the restroom, the Moroccan family who educates me on the Algerian conflict. As the sounds of Arabic swirl around me like the fluttering sands (Jamal, Naqah, Ibl, Ba’eer…), I’m reconnecting with an old friend: we’d first met when I decided to add a third language to English and Bengali. Day 6: The tents of Mina. Temperature blazing. Humidity high. I sleep next to an old woman who just embarked on her twentieth Hajj. When I discover she’s Pakistani, I speak to her in Urdu. Her ninety-year old energy--grounded, spiritual, and non-materialistic--inspires me. So far, every day has been a new discovery of my courage, spirit, and faith, and I see myself going on this journey many more times in my life. My new friend is curious where I, a Bengali, learned Urdu. I explain that as a Muslim living in America’s divided political climate, I wanted to understand my religion better by reading an ancient account of the life of Prophet Muhammad, but Seerat-un-Nabi is only in Urdu, so I learned to read it. I was delighted to discover the resonances: Qi-yaa-mah in Arabic becomes Qi-ya-mat in Urdu, Dh-a-lim becomes Zaa-lim… Urdu, which I had previously only understood academically, was the key to developing a personal connection with a generation different from mine. Day 8: “Fix your hair. You look silly,” my mom says in Bengali. When my parents want to speak privately, they speak our native tongue. Phrases like, “Can you grab some guava juice?” draw us closer together. My parents taught me to look out for myself from a young age, so Hajj is one of the only times we experienced something formative together. Our “secret” language made me see Bengali, which I’ve spoken all my life, as beautiful. It also made me aware of how important shared traditions are. As I think back to those sweltering, eclectic days, the stories and spiritual connections linger. No matter what languages we spoke, we are all Muslims in a Muslim country, the first time I’d ever experienced that. I came out of my American bubble and discovered I was someone to be looked up to. Having studied Islam my whole life, I knew the ins and outs of Hajj. This, along with my love for language, made me, the youngest, the sage of our group. Whether at the Al-Baik store in our camp or the Jamarat where Satan is stoned, people asked me about standards for wearing hijab or to read the Quran out loud. I left the journey feeling fearless. Throughout my life, I’ll continue to seek opportunities where I’m respected, proud to be Muslim, and strong enough to stand up for others. The next time I go to Hajj, I want to speak two more languages: donc je peux parler à plus de gens and quiero escuchar más historias. — — —

It’s visceral and evocative. Details about the specific resonance of Urdu words and the conversations this author shared with the people they met on their Hajj brings this essay to life. Nearly every line is full of vivid imagery and textured language . Those details make this piece fun to read and truly bring us into the world of the author. Whenever you’re writing, think about how you can engage all five senses to show, not simply tell, how you experienced something. 

It uses images to convey a sense of time, place, and self. Notice how this author’s use of images and details give this personal statement a dream-like quality, hopping between spaces, people, languages, and thoughts. As a result, the author is able to talk about so many different aspects of their culture. The way the details are conveyed also speaks to the aesthetic sensibilities of the author, providing another window into who they are as a person. When you’re writing, think about how you can use imagistic language to show the reader what you care about. 

It uses dialogue effectively. Dialogue isn’t always the best strategy, as it can take up a good chunk of your word count without explicitly saying anything about who you are. In this piece, however, the author does a great job of using their conversations with people they meet along their journey to convey their values and interests. Not only does the dialogue emphasize their fascination with language and cultural exchange, but it breaks up what would have been dense paragraphs into nice manageable chunks that are easier to read.

Personal Statement Example #3 12

12 is the number of my idol, Tom Brady. It’s the sum of all the letters in my name. It’s also how old I was when I started high school. In short, I skipped two grades: first and sixth. Between kindergarten and eighth grade, I attended five schools, including two different styles of homeschooling (three years at a co-op and one in my kitchen). Before skipping, I was perennially bored. But when I began homeschooling, everything changed. Free to move as fast as I wanted, I devoured tomes from Jefferson, Hamilton, and Madison to London, Kipling, and Twain. I wrote 10-page papers on subjects from Ancient Sparta and military history to the founding of the United States and the resounding impact of slavery. I discovered more than I ever had, kindling a lifelong joy for learning. While high school offered welcome academic opportunities--studying two languages and taking early science APs chief among them--the social environment was a different beast. Many classmates considered me more a little brother than a true friend, and my age and laser focus on academics initially made me socially inept. I joined sports teams in spring and built better relationships, but my lack of size (5’1”) and strength relegated me to the end of the bench. Oftentimes, I secretly wished I was normal age. That secret desire manifested itself in different ways. While I’ve loved football since I was a little kid, I soon became obsessed with personal success on the gridiron--the key, I figured, to social acceptance and the solution to my age problem. I had grown up obsessively tracking my New England Patriots. Now, instead of armchair quarterbacking, I poured hours into throwing mechanics and studying film after my homework each night. Itching to grow, I adopted Brady’s diet, cutting dairy, white flour, and processed sugar. But in the rush to change, my attitude towards academics shifted; I came to regard learning as more a job than a joy. No matter what talents I possessed, I viewed myself as a failure because I couldn’t play. That view held sway until a conversation with my friend Alex, the fastest receiver on the team. As I told him I wished we could switch places so I could succeed on the gridiron, he stared incredulously. “Dude,” he exclaimed, “I wish I was you!” Hearing my friends voice their confidence in my abilities prompted me to reflect: I quickly realized I was discounting my academic talents to fit a social construct. Instead of pushing myself to be something I wasn’t, I needed to meld my talents and my passions. Instead of playing sports, I recognized, I should coach them. My goal to coach professionally has already helped me embrace the academic side of the game—my side—rather than sidelining it. I have devoured scouting tomes, analyzed NFL game film, spoken with pros like Dante Scarnecchia, and even joined the American Football Coaches Association. Translating that coach’s mentality into practice, I began explaining the concepts behind different plays to my teammates, helping them see the subtleties of strategy (despite Coach Whitcher’s complaints that I was trying to steal his job). And I discovered that my intellectual understanding of the game is far more important in determining my success than my athletic tools: with the discipline, adaptability, and drive I had already developed, I’ve become a better player, student, and friend. Physically and mentally, I’ve changed a lot since freshman year, growing 11 inches and gaining newfound confidence in myself and my abilities. Instead of fighting for social acceptance, I’m free to focus on the things I love. Academically, that change re-inspired me. Able to express my full personality without social pressure, I rededicated myself in the classroom and my community. I still secretly wish to be Tom Brady. But now, I’m happy to settle for Bill Belichick. — — —

There’s a wonderful hook. The first line is great. It’s funny, intriguing, and doesn’t give too much away. In just the first bit we already know that the author is a football enthusiast, detail-oriented, and academically gifted. Not only does it tell us a lot about him, but it allows him to transition into the meat of his story about how his unconventional educational trajectory influenced the person he is today. Think about how you can use the first sentence or two of your personal statement to effectively introduce readers to your narrative voice and rope them into reading more.

It has a great “Aha!” moment. Great personal statements often convey growth. In this example, the author struggles to find a place for himself in high school after skipping two grades and being homeschooled for a significant portion of his life. It isn’t until his friend on the football team affirms his value that he starts to see all of the ways in which his unique skills benefit the people around him. If you think of your essay like a movie reel of your life, this moment is sort of like the climax. It’s when the mindset of the main character changes and allows him to embrace what he’s got. The anticipation and release of this “aha moment” keeps readers engaged in the piece and demonstrates your ability, as the applicant, to be self-reflective and adaptable to change.

It covers a broad time frame, but still fits in tons of nice details. This essay essentially talks about the author’s life from 5th grade to present day. He’s not focusing on one specific moment. This is absolutely something you can do as well if you want to demonstrate how you’ve grown over a longer period of time. However, notice that the author here doesn’t sacrifice depth for breadth. Even though he’s covering a pretty significant chunk of time, he still touches on great details about his favorite classes and authors, football role models, and conversations with friends. These are what make the essay great and specific to his life. If you’re going to talk about more than just one event or moment, don’t forget to highlight important details along the way.

Learn how to write your personal statement here

Personal statement example #4 flying.

As a young child, I was obsessed with flying. I spent hours watching birds fly, noting how the angle of their wings affected the trajectory of their flight. I would then waste tons of fresh printer paper, much to the dismay of my parents, to test out various wing types by constructing paper airplanes. One day, this obsession reached its fever pitch. I decided to fly. I built a plane out of a wooden clothes rack and blankets, with trash bags as precautionary parachutes. As you can imagine, the maiden flight didn’t go so well. After being in the air for a solid second, the world came crashing around me as I slammed onto the bed, sending shards of wood flying everywhere. Yet, even as a five-year-old, my first thoughts weren’t about the bleeding scratches that covered my body. Why didn’t the wings function like a bird’s wings? Why did hitting something soft break my frame? Why hadn’t the parachutes deployed correctly? Above all, why didn’t I fly? As I grew older, my intrinsic drive to discover why stimulated a desire to solve problems, allowing my singular passion of flying to evolve into a deep-seated love of engineering. I began to challenge myself academically, taking the hardest STEM classes offered . Not only did this allow me to complete all possible science and math courses by the end of my junior year, but it also surrounded me with the smartest kids of the grades above me, allowing me access to the advanced research they were working on. As such, I developed an innate understanding of topics such as protein function in the brain and differential equation modeling early in high school, helping me develop a strong science and math foundation to supplement my passion for engineering. I also elected to participate in my school’s engineering pathway . As a team leader, I was able to develop my leadership skills as I identified and utilized each member’s strength to produce the best product. I sought to make design collaborative, not limited to the ideas of one person. In major group projects, such as building a hovercraft, I served as both president and devil’s advocate, constantly questioning if each design decision was the best option, ultimately resulting in a more efficient model that performed significantly better than our initial prototype. Most of all, I sought to solve problems that impact the real world . Inspired by the water crisis in India, I developed a water purification system that combines carbon nanotube filters with shock electrodialysis to both desalinate and purify water more efficiently and cost-effectively than conventional plants. The following year, I ventured into disease detection, designing a piezoresistive microcantilever that detected the concentration of beta-amyloid protein to medically diagnose a patient with Alzheimer’s disease, a use for cantilevers that hadn’t yet been discovered. The project received 1st Honors at the Georgia Science Fair. Working on these two projects, I saw the raw power of engineering – an abstract idea gradually becoming reality . I was spending most of my days understanding the why behind things, while also discovering solutions to prevalent issues. In a world that increasingly prioritizes a singular solution, I am captivated by engineering’s ability to continuously offer better answers to each problem. Thirteen years have passed since that maiden flight, and I have yet to crack physical human flight . My five-year-old self would have seen this as a colossal failure. But the intense curiosity that I found in myself that day is still with me. It has continued to push me, forcing me to challenge myself to tackle ever more complex problems, engrossed by the promise and applicability of engineering. I may never achieve human flight . However, now I see what once seemed like a crash landing as a runway, the platform off of which my love of engineering first took flight. — — —

The author isn’t afraid to ask questions. This writer is clearly a curious and intellectual person. The questions they ask in the first part of the essay (“Why didn’t the wings function like a bird’s wings? Why did hitting something soft break my frame? Why hadn’t the parachutes deployed correctly? Above all, why didn’t I fly?”) highlight that. In your essay, don’t shy away from asking tough questions. In the end, the author still hasn’t achieved human flight, but you can clearly see how his interest in the whys of life has propelled him to take on new engineering problems. Sometimes, you don’t need to answer the questions you pose for them to serve a purpose in your essay.

It returns back to where it started. There’s something satisfying about returning to your intro in your conclusion. In this case, the author comes back to his first flying experience and re-evaluates what the experience means to him now as well as how his thinking has evolved. Think of your essay as a circle (or maybe a blob depending on what you’re writing about). Your end should loop back to where you started after your narrative arc is mostly complete.

Uses specific jargon (but not too much). We might not know what a “piezoresistive microcantilever” is or how it relates to “beta-amyloid proteins,” but that’s not really the point of including it in this essay. By using these terms the author signals to us that he knows what he’s talking about and has a degree of expertise in engineering. On the flip side, you don’t want to use so much jargon that your reader has no idea what you’re saying. Including a little bit of field-specific language can go a long way, so you don’t want to overdo it. If you’re not sure what specific details or language to include, check out our 21 Details Exercise and see if that helps you brainstorm some ideas.

Personal Statement Example #5 Arab Spring in Bahrain

February 2011– My brothers and I were showing off our soccer dribbling skills in my grandfather’s yard when we heard gunshots and screaming in the distance. We paused and listened, confused by sounds we had only ever heard on the news or in movies. My mother rushed out of the house and ordered us inside. The Arab Spring had come to Bahrain. I learned to be alert to the rancid smell of tear gas. Its stench would waft through the air before it invaded my eyes, urging me inside before they started to sting. Newspaper front pages constantly showed images of bloodied clashes, made worse by Molotov cocktails. Martial Law was implemented; roaming tanks became a common sight. On my way to school, I nervously passed burning tires and angry protesters shouting “Yaskut Hamad! “ [“Down with King Hamad!”]. Bahrain, known for its palm trees and pearls, was waking up from a slumber. The only home I had known was now a place where I learned to fear. September 2013– Two and a half years after the uprisings, the events were still not a distant memory. I decided the answer to fear was understanding. I began to analyze the events and actions that led to the upheaval of the Arab Springs. In my country, religious and political tensions were brought to light as Shias, who felt underrepresented and neglected within the government, challenged the Sunnis, who were thought to be favored for positions of power. I wanted equality and social justice; I did not want the violence to escalate any further and for my country to descend into the nightmare that is Libya and Syria. September 2014– Pursuing understanding helped allay my fears, but I also wanted to contribute to Bahrain in a positive way. I participated in student government as a student representative and later as President, became a member of Model United Nations (MUN), and was elected President of the Heritage Club, a charity-focused club supporting refugees and the poor. As an MUN delegate, I saw global problems from perspectives other than my own and used my insight to push for compromise. I debated human rights violations in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict from an Israeli perspective, argued whether Syrian refugees should be allowed entry into neighboring European countries, and then created resolutions for each problem. In the Heritage Club, I raised funds and ran food drives so that my team could provide support for less fortunate Bahrainis. We regularly distributed boxed lunches to migrant workers, bags of rice to refugees and air conditioners to the poor. April 2016 – The Crown Prince International Scholarship Program (CPISP) is an intensive leadership training program where participants are chosen on merit, not political ideologies. Both Shia and Sunni candidates are selected, helping to diversify the future leadership of my country. I was shortlisted to attend the training during that summer. July 2016 – The CPISP reaffirmed for me the importance of cooperation. At first, building chairs out of balloons and skyscrapers out of sticks didn’t seem meaningful. But as I learned to apply different types of leadership styles to real-life situations and honed my communication skills to lead my team, I began to see what my country was missing: harmony based on trust. Bringing people together from different backgrounds and successfully completing goals—any goal—builds trust. And trust is the first step to lasting peace. October 2016 – I have only begun to understand my people and my history, but I no longer live in fear. Instead, I have found purpose. I plan to study political science and economics to find answers for the issues that remain unresolved in my country. Bahrain can be known for something more than pearl diving, palm trees, and the Arab Spring; it can be known for the understanding of its people, including me. — — —

Orients the reader in time. As you’ve seen in several other example essays already, date and time can be used very effectively to structure a piece. This author talks about an intensely political topic, which changed drastically over the course of a specific timeframe. Because of that, the use of timestamps elevates the piece and makes it easier for readers to follow the chronology of the story. If your essay topic is something that has changed significantly over time or has developed in a chronological way, this might be a great blueprint for you. Check out our Feelings and Needs Exercise to brainstorm for this kind of essay where you learn something along a narrative arc from Point A to Point B. 

Gives us the right amount of context. When you’re talking about political or cultural issues or events, don’t assume that your reader has a base level of knowledge. Although you don’t want to spend too much time on the nitty gritty details of policy reform or history, you should offer your reader some sense of when something was taking place and why. The author of this piece does that very succinctly and accessibly in his “September 2013” entry.

Emphasizes the author’s role and contributions. With political topics, it’s easy to get carried away talking about the issue itself. However, remember that this is ultimately a personal statement, not a political statement. You want to make sure you talk about yourself in the essay. So, even though the author is discussing a huge event, he focuses on his participation in Model UN, CRISP, and Heritage Club. When possible, think about how big issues manifest in your day to day life as well as what you specifically are doing to take action.

READY TO START WRITING? How To Start a College Essay: 9 Surefire Techniques

Personal statement example #6 poop, animals and the environment.

I have been pooped on many times. I mean this in the most literal sense possible. I have been pooped on by pigeons and possums, house finches and hawks, egrets and eastern grays. I don’t mind it, either. For that matter, I also don’t mind being pecked at, hissed at, scratched and bitten—and believe me, I have experienced them all. I don’t mind having to skin dead mice, feeding the remaining red embryonic mass to baby owls. (Actually, that I do mind a little.) I don’t mind all this because when I’m working with animals , I know that even though they probably hate me as I patch them up, their health and welfare is completely in my hands. Their chances of going back to the wild, going back to their homes, rely on my attention to their needs and behaviors. My enduring interest in animals and habitat loss led me to intern at the Wildlife Center of Silicon Valley over the summer , and it was there that I was lucky enough to meet those opossum joeys that defecated on my shoes whenever I picked them up (forcing me to designate my favorite pair of shoes as animal hospital shoes, never to be worn elsewhere again). It was there that a juvenile squirrel decided my finger looked fit to suckle, and that many an angry pigeon tried to peck off my hands. And yet, when the internship ended, I found myself hesitant to leave . That hesitation didn’t simply stem from my inherent love of animals. It was from the sense of responsibility that I developed while working with orphaned and injured wildlife. After all, most of the animals are there because of us—the baby opossums and squirrels are there because we hit their mothers with our cars, raptors and coyotes end up there due to secondary rodenticide poisoning and illegal traps. We are responsible for the damage, so I believe we are responsible for doing what we can to help. And of course, there is empathy—empathy for the animals who lost their mothers, their homes, their sight and smell, their ability to fly or swim. I couldn’t just abandon them. I couldn’t just abandon them the same way I couldn’t let big oil companies completely devastate the Arctic, earth’s air conditioner . The same way I couldn’t ignore the oceans, where destructive fishing practices have been wiping out ocean life. These are not jobs that can be avoided or left half-finished. For some, the Arctic is simply too far away, and the oceans will always teem with life, while for others these problems seem too great to ever conquer. And while I have had these same feelings many times over, I organized letter-writing campaigns, protested, and petitioned the oil companies to withdraw. I campaigned in local parks to educate people on sustaining the seas. I hold on to the hope that persistent efforts will prevent further damage. I sometimes wonder if my preoccupation with social and environmental causes just makes me feel less guilty. Maybe I do it just to ease my own conscience, so I can tell people “At least I did something.” I hope that it’s not just that. I hope it’s because my mother always told me to treat others as I want to be treated, even if I sometimes took this to its logical extreme, moving roadkill to the bushes along the side of the road because “Ma, if I was hit by a car I would want someone to move me off the road, too.” The upshot is that I simply cannot walk away from injustice, however uncomfortable it is to confront it . I choose to act, taking a stand and exposing the truth in the most effective manner that I think is possible. And while I’m sure I will be dumped on many times, both literally and metaphorically, I won’t do the same to others. — — —

Another great hook. Much like the football essay, this one starts off with a bang. After hearing about all the pecking, hissing, pooping, and clawing that the author endured, chances are you want to read more. And notice how the initial pooping hook comes back in the last line of the essay.

The scope gets wider as the piece progresses. The author starts with specific details about an internship opportunity then gradually works her way to broader topics about social justice and environmental activism. Every part of the piece emphasizes her values, but they are more explicitly stated towards the end. This trajectory is nice because it allows the reader to ease themselves into the world of the author and then see how specific opportunities or interests connect to broader goals or ambitions. When you’re revising your essay, take a look at each paragraph and see if each one brings something new to the table or moves the narrative forward in some way.

It’s funny . This author does a great job of using humor as a tool to endear her to readers, but not as a crutch to lean on when she has nothing else to say. Not only is she cracking jokes about poop, but also deeply interrogating her own motivations for being interested in social and environmental activism. The balance of humor and genuine reflection is fun to read while also saying a lot about the author and her values/interests.

Personal Statement Example #7 Entoptic Phenomena

I subscribe to what the New York Times dubs “the most welcomed piece of daily e-mail in cyberspace.” Cat pictures? Kardashian updates? Nope: A Word A Day. Out of the collection of diverse words I received, one word stuck out to me in particular. Entoptic : relating to images that originate within the eye (as opposed to from light entering the eye). Examples of entoptic phenomena: floaters, thread-like fragments that appear to float in front of the eye but are caused by matter within the eye. (for a picture: https://wordsmith.org/words/entoptic.html) As I read through this entry, I was suddenly transported back to the first grade, when I was playing Pokémon Go one day with my friends during recess. Our version was epic: we escaped into virtual reality with our imagination rather than our phone screens, morphing into different Pokémon to do battle. My friend Ryan had just transformed into an invisible ghost-type Pokémon capable of evading my attacks. Flustered, I was attempting to evolve my abilities to learn to see the invisible. Between rubbing my eyes and squinting, I began to make out subtle specks in the air that drifted from place to place. Aha—the traces of the ghost Pokémon! I launched a thunderbolt straight through the air and declared a super-effective knockout. ...Of course, I never was able to explain what I was seeing to my bewildered friends that day in first grade. But after learning about entoptic phenomena, I realized that my entoptic adventure was not a hallucination but, in fact, one of my first intellectual milestones, when I was first able to connect meticulous observation of my environment to my imagination. Nowadays, I don’t just see minuscule entoptic phenomena: I see ghosts, too. Two of their names are Larry and Kailan, and they are the top-ranked players in the Exynos League. Exynos is the name of the elaborate basketball league I have created in my imagination over the last ten years of playing basketball on the neighborhood court in the evenings. As I play, I envision Larry and Kailan right there with me: reaching, stealing, and blocking. Undoubtedly, I might look a little silly when I throw the ball backwards as if Larry blocked my layup attempt—but imagining competitors defending me drives me to be precise in my execution of different moves and maneuvers. More than that, it is a constant motivator for all my endeavors: whether I’m researching for debate or studying for the next math contest, I am inventing and personifying new competitive ghosts that are hard at work every minute I’m off task. But I perceive perhaps the most vivid images through music, as I tell a different story with each piece I play on the violin. When I play Bach’s lively Prelude in E Major, for example, I visualize a mouse dashing up and down hills and through mazes to escape from an evil cat (à la Tom and Jerry). But when I play Tchaikovsky’s Violin Concerto, I describe a relationship plagued by unrequited love. I revel in the intellectual challenge of coming up with a story that is not only consistent with the composer’s annotations but also resonates with my own experiences. Between re-living Tom and Jerry episodes and shooting fadeaway three-pointers against ghosts, then, perhaps entoptic phenomena don’t tell my whole story. So, here’s my attempt—in the form of a word of the day, of course: Pokémon Boom : a legendary form of augmented reality so pure that it is commonly mistaken for hallucination. Denizens of this world are rumored to watch Netflix re-runs without WiFi and catch many a Pikachu via psychokinesis. — — —

It makes tons of uncommon connections. Think about the range of topics covered in this piece: words, Pokémon, basketball, ghosts, debate, math, and music (to name just a few). Yet the author uses the idea of imagination and its relation to vision to weave these disparate topics into a coherent narrative. In fact, his ability to do so emphasizes his ability to think creatively in ways that the average person may not. To find these, consider brainstorming everything you want colleges to know about you and then think of interesting ways in which these might intersect. 

It doesn’t try to be overly intellectual. This essay spends most of its time talking about things that we wouldn’t traditionally consider “academic” or “college-y.” In fact, at least a third of it is devoted solely to Pokémon. The author briefly touches on his interest in math and debate, but otherwise it’s used more as a short example than a key point. The takeaway is: you don’t have to talk about classes or academic interests to write a killer essay. You absolutely can if you want to, but feel free to let your imagination run wild. If something excites or intrigues you, try writing a draft about it and see where it takes you.

It’s specific to the author. The combination of examples and insights you see in this essay truly couldn’t have been written by anyone else. Imagine you’re the admissions officer reading this application. It would absolutely stand out from the other essays in the bunch. Sure, other people play basketball. Sure, other people might like Pokémon or enjoy music. But, the particular way in which the author articulates his interests and connects them makes it memorable.

Personal Statement Example #8 The Builder & Problem Solver

Since childhood, I have been an obsessive builder and problem solver . When I was 6, I spent two months digging a hole in my backyard, ruining the grass lawn, determined to make a giant koi pond after watching a show on HGTV. After watching Castaway when I was 7, I started a fire in my backyard--to my mother's horror--using bark and kindling like Tom Hanks did. I neglected chores and spent nights locked in my room drawing pictures and diagrams or learning rubik's cube algorithms while my mother yelled at me through the door to go to sleep. I've always been compulsive about the things I set my mind to. The satisfaction of solving problems and executing my visions is all-consuming. But my obsessive personality has helped me solve other problems, too. When I was 8, I taught myself how to pick locks . I always dreamed of how cool it must have been inside my brother’s locked bedroom. So I didn't eat at school for two weeks and saved up enough lunch money to buy a lockpicking set from Home Depot. After I wiggled the tension wrench into the keyhole and twisted it counterclockwise, I began manipulating the tumblers in the keyhole with the pick until I heard the satisfying click of the lock and entered the room. Devouring his stash of Lemonheads was awesome, but not as gratifying as finally getting inside his room. As the projects I tackled got bigger, I had to be more resourceful . One day in history class after reading about early American inventions, I decided to learn how to use a Spinning Jenny. When my parents unsurprisingly refused to waste $500 on an 18th century spinning wheel, I got to work visiting DIY websites to construct my own by disassembling my bike and removing the inner tube from the wheel, gathering string and nails, and cutting scrap wood. For weeks, I brushed my two cats everyday until I had gathered enough fur. I washed and soaked it, carded it with paddle brushes to align the fibers, and then spun it into yarn, which I then used to crochet a clutch purse for my grandmother on mother's day. She still uses it to this day. In high school, my obsessive nature found a new outlet in art . Being a perfectionist, I often tore up my work in frustration at the slightest hint of imperfection. As a result, I was slowly falling behind in my art class, so I had to seek out alternate solutions to actualize the ideas I had in my head. Oftentimes that meant using mixed media or experimenting with unconventional materials like newspaper or cardboard. Eventually I went on to win several awards, showcased my art in numerous galleries and magazines, and became President of National Art Honors Society. Taking four years of art hasn't just taught me to be creative, it’s taught me that there are multiple solutions to a problem. After high school I began to work on more difficult projects and I channeled my creativity into a different form of art - programming . I’m currently working on an individual project at the Schepens Institute at Harvard University. I'm writing a program in Matlab that can measure visual acuity and determine what prescription glasses someone would need. I ultimately plan to turn this into a smartphone app to be released to the general public. The fact is that computer coding is in many ways similar to the talents and hobbies I enjoyed as a child—they all require finding creative ways to solve problems . While my motivation to solve these problems might have been a childlike sense of satisfaction in creating new things, I have developed a new and profound sense of purpose and desire to put my problem solving skills to better our world. — — —

It turns a perceived weakness into a critical strength. At the beginning of the essay, the author talks about all of the problems she caused because of her obsession (ironically) with problem-solving. However, as the piece progresses, we begin to see how her childlike curiosity and interest in making things became a clear asset. It becomes a way of emphasizing values like resourcefulness, empathy, and dedication. In several other essay examples, we’ve highlighted this idea of growth. This example is no exception. Highlighting the ways in which you’ve changed or reframed your thinking is a great thing to show off to college admissions officers. If you know you’ve experienced some significant change but you’re not sure how to describe it, use our Feelings and Needs Exercise to get started.

There’s a discussion of what’s next. Many colleges are interested not only in what you’ve done, but also how you’d like to pursue your interests in the future. The author here spends some time at the end talking about her plans for a prescription-measuring smartphone app and her general interest in learning more about computer coding. While the piece has a clear conclusion, these examples highlight the ongoing nature of her educational journey and her openness to further learning. It answers the question of “ so what? ”

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Personal statement example #9 the little porch and a dog.

It was the first Sunday of April. My siblings and I were sitting at the dinner table giggling and spelling out words in our alphabet soup. The phone rang and my mother answered. It was my father; he was calling from prison in Oregon. My father had been stopped by immigration on his way to Yakima, Washington, where he’d gone in search of work. He wanted to fulfill a promise he’d made to my family of owning our own house with a nice little porch and a dog. Fortunately, my father was bailed out of prison by a family friend in Yakima. Unfortunately, though, most of our life savings was spent on his bail. We moved into a rented house, and though we did have a porch, it wasn’t ours. My father went from being a costurero (sewing worker) to being a water-filter salesman, mosaic tile maker, lemon deliverer, and butcher. Money became an issue at home, so I started helping out more. After school I’d rush home to clean up and make dinner. My parents refused to let me have a “real” job, so on Saturday afternoons I’d go to the park with my older brother to collect soda cans. Sundays and summertime were spent cleaning houses with my mother. I worked twice as hard in school. I helped clean my church, joined the choir, and tutored my younger sister in math. As tensions eased at home, I returned to cheerleading, joined a school club called Step Up , and got involved in my school’s urban farm, where I learned the value of healthy eating. Slowly, life improved. Then I received some life-changing news. My father’s case was still pending and, due to a form he’d signed when he was released in Yakima, it was not only him that was now in danger of being deported, it was my entire family. My father’s lawyer informed me that I’d have to testify in court and in fact our stay in the US was now dependent on my testimony. The lawyer had an idea: I had outstanding grades and recommendation letters. If we could show the judge the importance of my family remaining here to support my education, perhaps we had a chance. So I testified. My father won his case and was granted residency. Living in a low-income immigrant household has taught me to appreciate all I’ve been given.  Testifying in court helped me grow as a person, has made me more open-minded and aware of the problems facing my community. And my involvement in the urban farm has led me to consider a career as a nutritionist. Though neither of my parents attended college, they understand that college is a key factor to a bright future and therefore have been very supportive. And though we don't yet have the house with the small porch and the dog, we're still holding out hope. I believe college can help. — — —

Drops us in a moment in time. The beginning of this essay is a bit disorienting because it places us in a scene within the author’s life as they experience it. We don’t know all of the information, so we’re a bit confused, but that confusion makes us want to read more. This is a great tactic when done well because it helps us identify with the author and piques our curiosity.

Shows the agency, independence, and resilience of the applicant. The author here goes through a lot over the course of the essay. They have to face very real fears about incarceration, deportation, and financial instability on a daily basis. Talking about the ways in which they approached these obstacles highlights their ability to think clearly under pressure and make the most of what they have. If you have faced significant hardships , worked through them, learned valuable lessons, and want to share these with colleges, the personal statement can be a good place to do that. If you’d prefer to write about something else in your personal statement, but you’d still like to mention your challenges somewhere in your application, you can instead briefly describe them in your Additional Information section. If you want to write about struggles that are particularly related to COVID-19, check out our guide for specific suggestions.

Spanish Translation:

Era el primer domingo de abril. Mis hermanos y yo estábamos sentados en la mesa del comedor riendonos y deletreando palabras en nuestra sopa de letras. El teléfono sonó y mi madre respondió. Era mi padre. El estaba llamando desde la cárcel en Oregon. Mi padre había sido detenido por inmigración en su camino a Yakima, Washington, donde había ido en busca de trabajo. Quería cumplir una promesa que le había hecho a mi familia de tener nuestra propia casa con un pequeño y agradable porche y un perro. Afortunadamente, mi padre fue rescatado de la cárcel por un amigo de la familia en Yakima. Pero lamentablemente la mayor parte de nuestros ahorros se gastó en su fianza . Nos mudamos a una casa alquilada, y aunque teníamos un porche, no era nuestra. Mi padre pasó de ser un costurero (trabajador de coser) de ser un vendedor de filtros de agua, fabricante de baldosas de mosaicos, libertador de limones, y carnicero. El dinero se convirtió en un problema en casa, así que comencé a ayudar más. Después de la escuela llegaba temprano a mi hogar para limpiar y preparar la cena. Mis padres se negaron a dejarme tener un trabajo "real.” Por lo tanto, los sábados por la tarde me iba al parque con mi hermano mayor para recoger latas de refrescos. En domingos y en el verano limpiaba casas con mi madre. Trabajé dos veces más duro en la escuela. Ayudé a limpiar mi iglesia, me uní al coro, y dí clases particulares a mi hermana menor en las matemáticas. Mientras las tensiones disminuyeron en casa, volví al grupo de porristas, me uní a un club escolar llamado Step Up, y me involucré en la granja urbana de mi escuela, donde aprendí el valor de la alimentación saludable. Poco a poco, la vida mejoraba. Luego recibí una noticia que cambia la vida. El caso de mi padre todavía estaba pendiente, y debido a una forma que había firmado cuando fue liberado en Yakima, no sólo era él que estaba ahora en peligro de ser deportado, era toda mi familia. El abogado de mi padre me informó  que yo tendría que declarar ante los tribunales, y de hecho, nuestra estancia en los EE.UU. ahora dependia de mi testimonio. El abogado tuvo una idea: yo tenía sobresalientes calificaciones y cartas de recomendaciones. Si pudiéramos demostrar a la juez la importancia de que mi familia se quedará aquí para apoyar a mi educación, tal vez tuviéramos una oportunidad. Así que di mi testimonio. Mi padre ganó su caso y se le concedió la residencia. Vivir en un hogar de inmigrantes de bajos ingresos me ha enseñado a apreciar todo lo que se me ha dado . Dar mi testimonio en el tribunal me ha ayudado a crecer como persona y  me ha hecho más consciente de los problemas que se enfrentan en mi comunidad. Y mi implicación en la granja urbana me ha llevado a considerar una carrera como nutricionista . Aunque ninguno de mis padres asistieron a la universidad, ellos entienden que la universidad es un factor clave para un futuro brillante, y por lo tanto, han sido un gran apoyo . Y aunque todavía no tenemos la casa con el pequeño porche y el perro, todavía estamos tendiendo la esperanza. Creo que la universidad puede ayudar. — — —

Personal Statement Example #10 Life As an Undocumented Student

At six years old, I stood locked away in the restroom. I held tightly to a tube of toothpaste because I’d been sent to brush my teeth to distract me from the commotion. Regardless, I knew what was happening: my dad was being put under arrest for domestic abuse. He’d hurt my mom physically and mentally, and my brother Jose and I had shared the mental strain. It’s what had to be done. Living without a father meant money was tight, mom worked two jobs, and my brother and I took care of each other when she worked. For a brief period of time the quality of our lives slowly started to improve as our soon-to-be step-dad became an integral part of our family. He paid attention to the needs of my mom, my brother, and me. But our prosperity was short-lived as my step dad’s chronic alcoholism became more and more recurrent. When I was eight, my younger brother Fernando’s birth complicated things even further. As my step-dad slipped away, my mom continued working, and Fernando’s care was left to Jose and me. I cooked, Jose cleaned, I dressed Fernando, Jose put him to bed. We did what we had to do. As undocumented immigrants and with little to no family around us, we had to rely on each other. Fearing that any disclosure of our status would risk deportation, we kept to ourselves when dealing with any financial and medical issues. I avoided going on certain school trips, and at times I was discouraged to even meet new people. I felt isolated and at times disillusioned; my grades started to slip. Over time, however, I grew determined to improve the quality of life for my family and myself. Without a father figure to teach me the things a father could, I became my own teacher. I learned how to fix a bike, how to swim, and even how to talk to girls. I became resourceful, fixing shoes with strips of duct tape, and I even found a job to help pay bills. I became as independent as I could to lessen the time and money mom had to spend raising me. I also worked to apply myself constructively in other ways. I worked hard and took my grades from Bs and Cs to consecutive straight A’s. I shattered my school’s 1ooM breaststroke record, and learned how to play the clarinet, saxophone, and the oboe. Plus, I not only became the first student in my school to pass the AP Physics 1 exam, I’m currently pioneering my school’s first AP Physics 2 course ever. These changes inspired me to help others. I became president of the California Scholarship Federation, providing students with information to prepare them for college, while creating opportunities for my peers to play a bigger part in our community. I began tutoring kids, teens, and adults on a variety of subjects ranging from basic English to home improvement and even Calculus. As the captain of the water polo and swim team I’ve led practices crafted to individually push my comrades to their limits, and I’ve counseled friends through circumstances similar to mine. I’ve done tons, and I can finally say I’m proud of that. But I’m excited to say that there’s so much I have yet to do. I haven’t danced the tango, solved a Rubix Cube, explored how perpetual motion might fuel space exploration, or seen the World Trade Center. And I have yet to see the person that Fernando will become.   I’ll do as much as I can from now on. Not because I have to. Because I choose to. — — —

Again, the author shows growth. We’ve said it a couple times, but it’s nice to highlight growth when possible. Although the author’s family circumstances and immigrant status meant he had to face significant hardships, he learned how to take care of themselves and use his obstacles as motivation to succeed. We see concrete signs of growth in the way he improved his grades and got more involved in school clubs like the California Scholarship Federation as well as athletic extracurriculars like swimming. Essentially, he shows how he made the best of his situation.

The author’s curiosity is palpable. One of the best things about this essay is the very end. The writer has already shown us how much he has had to overcome and how much he’s thrived in high school despite his circumstances. However, he doesn’t just stop. He tells us about all the other things he hopes to do and conveys a clear excitement at the possibility for learning in the future. There’s something lovely about seeing someone who is excited for what the future might hold. It endears him to readers and demonstrates his natural inclination to continue pushing forward, no matter what life might throw his way. Plus, it’s worth noting that he ends on the quality of autonomy , which was his #1 value when you completed the Values Exercise .

Personal Statement Example #11 Umbra

Umbra: the innermost, darkest part of a shadow The fifth set of chimes rings out and I press my hands against the dusty doors. My nose itches, but scratching would smudge the little black whiskers painted onto my face. I peer through the tiny crack between the cupboard doors, trying to glimpse the audience. The sixth set of chimes, my cue, begins, and I pop onto stage, the brilliant lights flooding my vision. Clara and Drosselmeyer stand to my left, and in front of me lies an endless ocean of audience. I pause a moment, taking it in, then do my best mouse scurry towards the wings. I love performing and dancing to connect with an audience. I dance to inspire others, to share my joy and passion, and because I love the rush of excitement while I’m surrounded by the stage lights .  My hands, covered in grease, hurt terribly as I help another girl with the wire crimper. We force the handles together, and our Anderson connector is finally ready. People scurry around us—several students are riveting metal, assisted by my father (for me, robotics is a family activity), while another pair, including my younger brother, works on assembling the drive train. The next room is filled with shouted Java commands and autonomous code. I’m working on a system that will focus on the reflective tape on our target, allowing the camera to align our shooting mechanism. I love the comradery in robotics, the way teams support each other even amid intense competitions. I love seeing the real world application of knowledge, and take pride in competing in front of hundreds of people. Most of all, I love spending time with my family, connecting with them in our own unique way. Back in the electrical room, I plug in my connector, and the room is filled with bright green light .  I pull on a pair of Nitrile gloves before grabbing my forceps. I carefully extract my latest Western Blot from its gel box, placing it on the imaging system. I’m searching for the presence of PARP1 and PLK1 in dysplasia and tumor cells, especially in reference to DNA damage and apoptosis. I’ve already probed the blot with a fluorescent reagent for imaging. On the screen, I see my bands of protein expression, the bands of red light showing PARP1 and the bands of green showing PLK1. I haven’t been doing research for long, but I’ve already fallen in love with constantly having something new to learn.  Christmas carols play softly as I chase my little brother around the living room, trying to get him to wear a Santa hat. The smell of tamales wafts through the air as my mom and grandmother stand over the pot of mole sauce. The ornament boxes are opened on the floor, each one special to our family, representing our adventures, our love, our history. My dad is winding a mile-long string of lights around the tree, covering the room with a soft glow. My homemade gifts—hats, scarves, blankets I’ve knitted—lie messily wrapped beneath the tree. My family has made tamales on Christmas Eve for generations, and each year it’s a way for us to connect to both each other and our heritage.  Light will usually travel in a perfectly straight line, but if it comes in contact with something it can bounce off it or bend around it, which is why people make shadows. The very innermost part of that shadow, the umbra, is where no light has bent around you—it has completely changed direction, bounced off. People are constantly changing and shaping the light around them, and never notice. But in hindsight, I see it’s the lights that have shaped me. — — —

It demonstrates craft. This author went through 10+ drafts of this essay, and her effort shows in her refined language and structure. She uses images to beautiful effect, drawing us into each experience in her montage, from the moments on stage to robotics to the lab to her family. She also demonstrates craft through the subtlety of her structural thread—we’ve bolded light above, to make it more obvious, but notice how she essentially saves what would traditionally be her introduction for her final paragraph (with some beautiful, refined phrasing therein), and uses “Umbra” and light to thread the paragraphs. This is very hard to pull off well, and is why she went through so many revisions, to walk a fine line between subtlety and clarity.

Show and tell. Rather than just “ Show, don’t tell ,” in a college essay, we think it’s useful to show your reader first, but then use some “telling” language to make sure they walk away with a clear understanding of what’s important to you. For example, this author shows her values through details/actions/experiences—more on values in a sec—then uses the ends of her body paragraphs to more directly tell us about those values and reflect on what they mean to her. And her final paragraph both shows and tells, using language that offers strong symbolism, while also ending with some poetic phrasing that tells us how this all comes together (in case we somehow missed it).

Values and insight/reflection. Because values are core to your essay and application, we’re going to end this post discussing them one more time. Notice how each paragraph demonstrates different values (art/performing, community, engagement, inspiration, joy/passion in the first paragraph alone) and reflects on how or why those values are important to her. We walk away with a strong sense of who this student is and what she would bring to our college campus.

Personal Statement Example #12 Angry brown girl, feminist, singer, meme-lover

My Twitter bio reads: angry brown girl, feminist, singer, meme-lover. You will notice live-tweets of my feminist Pride and Prejudice thoughts, analyses of Hamilton’s power for musical representation, and political memes. Just as my posts bring together seemingly disparate topics, I believe there is a vibrancy that exists at the multidimensional place where my interests intersect.  Growing up as a debater and musician, it was easy to see the two as distinct entities where I had to make unequivocal choices. At the start of my junior year, I decided not to participate in the musical in order to work for Emerge California, an organization that helps Democratic women run for office. There I learned about data science, gender distributions in public office, and how to work with the evil printer. I also halted my voice and piano lessons to focus on building my student-led non-profit, Agents of Change. As someone who has diverted my energy into community activism, I can attest to the power of grassroots movements. It has been so rewarding to measure the impact that my team has had on my community. But even so, I felt that I was losing touch with the music that was such a profound part of me.  I found a new way of being when I started combining my artsy and political sides. I took an intensive class on protest music, where I learned how political movements have been shaped by the music of their time. While in the class, we were asked to compose our own songs. I am not a songwriter, but I am an activist, and I embraced the opportunity to turn music into an outlet for my political beliefs. As a first-generation American, I am dedicated to raising awareness about refugee rights and immigration. My songs about the Syrian Refugee Crisis let me find a way to bring the two sides of me together and gave me a rush that neither music nor politics by themselves would have provided.  This introduction led me to apply to the Telluride Association Protest Poetics program, where I dove deeper into my own identity. I wrote songs about police brutality and the ways that as a non-black person of color I am implicated in instances of subliminal racism. Over the course of the program, as I became more familiar with the visual, literary, and performance art we analyzed, I slowly started to realize that, though I confront colorism, jokes about Indian culture, and intra-community violence in some form every day, my proximity to whiteness still gives me immense amounts of privilege. I have come to know that this means I have a responsibility to both be at the forefront of movements, and conscious of not stepping over the voices of other intersectional identities. I hope that the music I choose to perform and the way I live my life can amplify, not overwrite, any of the struggles that others deal with daily.  Last year, I had another opportunity to use music to pay homage to an issue I care deeply about. In my South Asian community, mental health is an issue that is often papered over. When a member of my school community committed suicide, I was asked to sing “Amazing Grace” for the school to both unify and honor the student. Though I thought that I had really understood the power of music, holding that space for my entire school had a profound resonance that I still don’t fully understand.  My voice is an instrument for change -- whether it be through me raising my hand to contribute to a discussion in a classroom, speaking out against gun violence at a rally, or singing at an event of solidarity. I know that someday my voice, in conjunction with many other unique voices and perspectives, will make a difference. — — —

Get clear on the story you’re telling. Debate? Political organizing? Musical theater? Protest music? This writer probably had a lot more to say about all of those experiences. But we don’t get the whole backstory about her journey toward musical theater. Why? Because she’s clear on what this story is about (she may have even written a logline to get that clarity…). We don’t need a lot of context about her decision “not to participate in the musical” because this essay isn’t about her experiences with musical theater; it’s about her forging a new identity by combining seemingly disparate interests (e.g., music and political advocacy). Telling us every musical she’s ever been in won’t help us “get” what she’s saying in this essay (and she has the activities list to tell us that…). Instead, she shows us only the details relevant to her trying to balance a love of music with her newfound interests: she decides “not to participate in the musical,” and she “halts voice and piano lessons.”

Bridge the gap (between paragraphs). Stronger essays have paragraphs with clear relationships to one another. This writer uses various phrases to achieve that clarity. When she starts paragraph four with “this introduction,” you understand that she’s referring to her “songs about the Syrian Refugee Crisis” from the end of paragraph three. Similarly, she resolves the problem of her “losing touch” with music at the end of paragraph two by beginning paragraph three by stating she found a “new way of being…” She’s using those key moments of transition to tell her readers: hey, I’m going somewhere with all these ideas, you can trust me.

You don’t have to have all the answers . When the writer tells us that she sang “Amazing Grace” to honor someone in her community who died by suicide, she gets vulnerable—she says that she still doesn't “fully understand” the effects of that moment. In admitting that she’s still coming to terms with that experience, she comes off as a mature, reasoned person who thinks deeply about lived experience. No one reading your essay is going to expect you to have fully processed every difficult experience you’ve ever had in your life. That would be outrageous. What they will appreciate seeing, though, is that you’ve reflected deeply on lived experiences. Sometimes reflection yields answers. Sometimes it just yields more questions. Either is okay—just don’t feel like you need to have everything figured out to write about it (or that you need to pretend like you do).

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• Personal Statement on Leadership

Often in leadership studies, one is asked to list traits of a leader. In fact, even job interviewers will ask the interviewee the same question. However, if the leadership program has taught me anything it is that there is no single set of traits that define a leader. Each leader has to identify and find their own strengths and how these individual traits contribute to effective leadership. For example, I learned that I am most effective in emergency situations where other leaders would freeze. Identifying this skill has taught me what my own leadership qualities are; however, I recognize this is not the case for every leader. 

And finally, I have learned that the most important part about leadership is that it isn’t about you . No leader should be looking for their moment in the spotlight or controlling a situation that isn’t meant for them. As I mentioned, every leader has their own set of leadership qualities or traits, a leader needs to recognize when their own skill set can be used and when it is for the best of the group that they delegate power to someone else. Being a smart leader is in part recognizing when they are not the best leader and can be better utilized elsewhere.

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Gre prep online guides and tips, 3 successful graduate school personal statement examples.

Looking for grad school personal statement examples? Look no further! In this total guide to graduate school personal statement examples, we’ll discuss why you need a personal statement for grad school and what makes a good one. Then we’ll provide three graduate school personal statement samples from our grad school experts. After that, we’ll do a deep dive on one of our personal statement for graduate school examples. Finally, we’ll wrap up with a list of other grad school personal statements you can find online.

Why Do You Need a Personal Statement?

A personal statement is a chance for admissions committees to get to know you: your goals and passions, what you’ll bring to the program, and what you’re hoping to get out of the program.  You need to sell the admissions committee on what makes you a worthwhile applicant. The personal statement is a good chance to highlight significant things about you that don’t appear elsewhere on your application.

A personal statement is slightly different from a statement of purpose (also known as a letter of intent). A statement of purpose/letter of intent tends to be more tightly focused on your academic or professional credentials and your future research and/or professional interests.

While a personal statement also addresses your academic experiences and goals, you have more leeway to be a little more, well, personal. In a personal statement, it’s often appropriate to include information on significant life experiences or challenges that aren’t necessarily directly relevant to your field of interest.

Some programs ask for both a personal statement and a statement of purpose/letter of intent. In this case, the personal statement is likely to be much more tightly focused on your life experience and personality assets while the statement of purpose will focus in much more on your academic/research experiences and goals.

However, there’s not always a hard-and-fast demarcation between a personal statement and a statement of purpose. The two statement types should address a lot of the same themes, especially as relates to your future goals and the valuable assets you bring to the program. Some programs will ask for a personal statement but the prompt will be focused primarily on your research and professional experiences and interests. Some will ask for a statement of purpose but the prompt will be more focused on your general life experiences.

When in doubt, give the program what they are asking for in the prompt and don’t get too hung up on whether they call it a personal statement or statement of purpose. You can always call the admissions office to get more clarification on what they want you to address in your admissions essay.

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What Makes a Good Grad School Personal Statement?

A great graduate school personal statement can come in many forms and styles. However, strong grad school personal statement examples all share the same following elements:

A Clear Narrative

Above all, a good personal statement communicates clear messages about what makes you a strong applicant who is likely to have success in graduate school. So to that extent, think about a couple of key points that you want to communicate about yourself and then drill down on how you can best communicate those points. (Your key points should of course be related to what you can bring to the field and to the program specifically).

You can also decide whether to address things like setbacks or gaps in your application as part of your narrative. Have a low GPA for a couple semesters due to a health issue? Been out of a job for a while taking care of a family member? If you do decide to explain an issue like this, make sure that the overall arc is more about demonstrating positive qualities like resilience and diligence than about providing excuses.

Specific Examples

A great statement of purpose uses specific examples to illustrate its key messages. This can include anecdotes that demonstrate particular traits or even references to scholars and works that have influenced your academic trajectory to show that you are familiar and insightful about the relevant literature in your field.

Just saying “I love plants,” is pretty vague. Describing how you worked in a plant lab during undergrad and then went home and carefully cultivated your own greenhouse where you cross-bred new flower colors by hand is much more specific and vivid, which makes for better evidence.

A strong personal statement will describe why you are a good fit for the program, and why the program is a good fit for you. It’s important to identify specific things about the program that appeal to you, and how you’ll take advantage of those opportunities. It’s also a good idea to talk about specific professors you might be interested in working with. This shows that you are informed about and genuinely invested in the program.

Strong Writing

Even quantitative and science disciplines typically require some writing, so it’s important that your personal statement shows strong writing skills. Make sure that you are communicating clearly and that you don’t have any grammar and spelling errors. It’s helpful to get other people to read your statement and provide feedback. Plan on going through multiple drafts.

Another important thing here is to avoid cliches and gimmicks. Don’t deploy overused phrases and openings like “ever since I was a child.” Don’t structure your statement in a gimmicky way (i.e., writing a faux legal brief about yourself for a law school statement of purpose). The first will make your writing banal; the second is likely to make you stand out in a bad way.

Appropriate Boundaries

While you can be more personal in a personal statement than in a statement of purpose, it’s important to maintain appropriate boundaries in your writing. Don’t overshare anything too personal about relationships, bodily functions, or illegal activities. Similarly, don’t share anything that makes it seem like you may be out of control, unstable, or an otherwise risky investment. The personal statement is not a confessional booth. If you share inappropriately, you may seem like you have bad judgment, which is a huge red flag to admissions committees.

You should also be careful with how you deploy humor and jokes. Your statement doesn’t have to be totally joyless and serious, but bear in mind that the person reading the statement may not have the same sense of humor as you do. When in doubt, err towards the side of being as inoffensive as possible.

Just as being too intimate in your statement can hurt you, it’s also important not to be overly formal or staid. You should be professional, but conversational.

Graduate School Personal Statement Examples

Our graduate school experts have been kind enough to provide some successful grad school personal statement examples. We’ll provide three examples here, along with brief analysis of what makes each one successful.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 1

PDF of Sample Personal Statement 1 – Japanese Studies

For this Japanese Studies master’s degree, the applicant had to provide a statement of purpose outlining her academic goals and experience with Japanese and a separate personal statement describing her personal relationship with Japanese Studies and what led her to pursue a master’s degree.

Here’s what’s successful about this personal statement:

• An attention-grabbing beginning: The applicant begins with the statement that Japanese has never come easily to her and that it’s a brutal language to learn. Seeing as how this is an application for a Japanese Studies program, this is an intriguing beginning that makes the reader want to keep going.
• A compelling narrative: From this attention-grabbing beginning, the applicant builds a well-structured and dramatic narrative tracking her engagement with the Japanese language over time. The clear turning point is her experience studying abroad, leading to a resolution in which she has clarity about her plans. Seeing as how the applicant wants to be a translator of Japanese literature, the tight narrative structure here is a great way to show her writing skills.
• Specific examples that show important traits: The applicant clearly communicates both a deep passion for Japanese through examples of her continued engagement with Japanese and her determination and work ethic by highlighting the challenges she’s faced (and overcome) in her study of the language. This gives the impression that she is an engaged and dedicated student.

Overall, this is a very strong statement both in terms of style and content. It flows well, is memorable, and communicates that the applicant would make the most of the graduate school experience.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 2

PDF of Sample Graduate School Personal Statement 2 – Musical Composition

This personal statement for a Music Composition master’s degree discusses the factors that motivate the applicant to pursue graduate study.

Here’s what works well in this statement:

• The applicant provides two clear reasons motivating the student to pursue graduate study: her experiences with music growing up, and her family’s musical history. She then supports those two reasons with examples and analysis.
• The description of her ancestors’ engagement with music is very compelling and memorable. The applicant paints her own involvement with music as almost inevitable based on her family’s long history with musical pursuits.
• The applicant gives thoughtful analysis of the advantages she has been afforded that have allowed her to study music so extensively. We get the sense that she is insightful and empathetic—qualities that would add greatly to any academic community.

This is a strong, serviceable personal statement. And in truth, given that this for a masters in music composition, other elements of the application (like work samples) are probably the most important.  However, here are two small changes I would make to improve it:

• I would probably to split the massive second paragraph into 2-3 separate paragraphs. I might use one paragraph to orient the reader to the family’s musical history, one paragraph to discuss Giacomo and Antonio, and one paragraph to discuss how the family has influenced the applicant. As it stands, it’s a little unwieldy and the second paragraph doesn’t have a super-clear focus even though it’s all loosely related to the applicant’s family history with music.
• I would also slightly shorten the anecdote about the applicant’s ancestors and expand more on how this family history has motivated the applicant’s interest in music. In what specific ways has her ancestors’ perseverance inspired her? Did she think about them during hard practice sessions? Is she interested in composing music in a style they might have played? More specific examples here would lend greater depth and clarity to the statement.

Sample Personal Statement for Graduate School 3

PDF of Sample Graduate School Personal Statement 3 – Public Health

This is my successful personal statement for Columbia’s Master’s program in Public Health. We’ll do a deep dive on this statement paragraph-by-paragraph in the next section, but I’ll highlight a couple of things that work in this statement here:

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• This statement is clearly organized. Almost every paragraph has a distinct focus and message, and when I move on to a new idea, I move on to a new paragraph with a logical transitions.
• This statement covers a lot of ground in a pretty short space. I discuss my family history, my goals, my educational background, and my professional background. But because the paragraphs are organized and I use specific examples, it doesn’t feel too vague or scattered.
• In addition to including information about my personal motivations, like my family, I also include some analysis about tailoring health interventions with my example of the Zande. This is a good way to show off what kinds of insights I might bring to the program based on my academic background.

Grad School Personal Statement Example: Deep Dive

Now let’s do a deep dive, paragraph-by-paragraph, on one of these sample graduate school personal statements. We’ll use my personal statement that I used when I applied to Columbia’s public health program.

Paragraph One: For twenty-three years, my grandmother (a Veterinarian and an Epidemiologist) ran the Communicable Disease Department of a mid-sized urban public health department. The stories of Grandma Betty doggedly tracking down the named sexual partners of the infected are part of our family lore. Grandma Betty would persuade people to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases, encourage safer sexual practices, document the spread of infection and strive to contain and prevent it. Indeed, due to the large gay population in the city where she worked, Grandma Betty was at the forefront of the AIDS crises, and her analysis contributed greatly towards understanding how the disease was contracted and spread. My grandmother has always been a huge inspiration to me, and the reason why a career in public health was always on my radar.

This is an attention-grabbing opening anecdote that avoids most of the usual cliches about childhood dreams and proclivities. This story also subtly shows that I have a sense of public health history, given the significance of the AIDs crisis for public health as a field.

It’s good that I connect this family history to my own interests. However, if I were to revise this paragraph again, I might cut down on some of the detail because when it comes down to it, this story isn’t really about me. It’s important that even (sparingly used) anecdotes about other people ultimately reveal something about you in a personal statement.

Paragraph Two: Recent years have cemented that interest. In January 2012, my parents adopted my little brother Fred from China. Doctors in America subsequently diagnosed Fred with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy (DMD). My parents were told that if Fred’s condition had been discovered in China, the (very poor) orphanage in which he spent the first 8+ years of his life would have recognized his DMD as a death sentence and denied him sustenance to hasten his demise.

Here’s another compelling anecdote to help explain my interest in public health. This is an appropriately personal detail for a personal statement—it’s a serious thing about my immediate family, but it doesn’t disclose anything that the admissions committee might find concerning or inappropriate.

If I were to take another pass through this paragraph, the main thing I would change is the last phrase. “Denied him sustenance to hasten his demise” is a little flowery. “Denied him food to hasten his death” is actually more powerful because it’s clearer and more direct.

Paragraph Three: It is not right that some people have access to the best doctors and treatment while others have no medical care. I want to pursue an MPH in Sociomedical Sciences at Columbia because studying social factors in health, with a particular focus on socio-health inequities, will prepare me to address these inequities. The interdisciplinary approach of the program appeals to me greatly as I believe interdisciplinary approaches are the most effective way to develop meaningful solutions to complex problems.

In this paragraph I make a neat and clear transition from discussing what sparked my interest in public health and health equity to what I am interested in about Columbia specifically: the interdisciplinary focus of the program, and how that focus will prepare me to solve complex health problems. This paragraph also serves as a good pivot point to start discussing my academic and professional background.

Paragraph Four: My undergraduate education has prepared me well for my chosen career. Understanding the underlying structure of a group’s culture is essential to successfully communicating with the group. In studying folklore and mythology, I’ve learned how to parse the unspoken structures of folk groups, and how those structures can be used to build bridges of understanding. For example, in a culture where most illnesses are believed to be caused by witchcraft, as is the case for the Zande people of central Africa, any successful health intervention or education program would of necessity take into account their very real belief in witchcraft.

In this paragraph, I link my undergraduate education and the skills I learned there to public health. The (very brief) analysis of tailoring health interventions to the Zande is a good way to show insight and show off the competencies I would bring to the program.

Paragraph Five: I now work in the healthcare industry for one of the largest providers of health benefits in the world. In addition to reigniting my passion for data and quantitative analytics, working for this company has immersed me in the business side of healthcare, a critical component of public health.

This brief paragraph highlights my relevant work experience in the healthcare industry. It also allows me to mention my work with data and quantitative analytics, which isn’t necessarily obvious from my academic background, which was primarily based in the social sciences.

Paragraph Six: I intend to pursue a PhD in order to become an expert in how social factors affect health, particularly as related to gender and sexuality. I intend to pursue a certificate in Sexuality, Sexual Health, and Reproduction. Working together with other experts to create effective interventions across cultures and societies, I want to help transform health landscapes both in America and abroad.

This final paragraph is about my future plans and intentions. Unfortunately, it’s a little disjointed, primarily because I discuss goals of pursuing a PhD before I talk about what certificate I want to pursue within the MPH program! Switching those two sentences and discussing my certificate goals within the MPH and then mentioning my PhD plans would make a lot more sense.

I also start two sentences in a row with “I intend,” which is repetitive.

The final sentence is a little bit generic; I might tailor it to specifically discuss a gender and sexual health issue, since that is the primary area of interest I’ve identified.

This was a successful personal statement; I got into (and attended!) the program. It has strong examples, clear organization, and outlines what interests me about the program (its interdisciplinary focus) and what competencies I would bring (a background in cultural analysis and experience with the business side of healthcare). However, a few slight tweaks would elevate this statement to the next level.

Graduate School Personal Statement Examples You Can Find Online

So you need more samples for your personal statement for graduate school? Examples are everywhere on the internet, but they aren’t all of equal quality.

Most of examples are posted as part of writing guides published online by educational institutions. We’ve rounded up some of the best ones here if you are looking for more personal statement examples for graduate school.

Penn State Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School

This selection of ten short personal statements for graduate school and fellowship programs offers an interesting mix of approaches. Some focus more on personal adversity while others focus more closely on professional work within the field.

The writing in some of these statements is a little dry, and most deploy at least a few cliches. However, these are generally strong, serviceable statements that communicate clearly why the student is interested in the field, their skills and competencies, and what about the specific program appeals to them.

Cal State Sample Graduate School Personal Statements

These are good examples of personal statements for graduate school where students deploy lots of very vivid imagery and illustrative anecdotes of life experiences. There are also helpful comments about what works in each of these essays.

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However, all of these statements are definitely pushing the boundaries of acceptable length, as all are above 1000 and one is almost 1500 words! Many programs limit you to 500 words; if you don’t have a limit, you should try to keep it to two single-spaced pages at most (which is about 1000 words).

University of Chicago Personal Statement for Graduate School Examples

These examples of successful essays to the University of Chicago law school cover a wide range of life experiences and topics. The writing in all is very vivid, and all communicate clear messages about the students’ strengths and competencies.

Note, however, that these are all essays that specifically worked for University of Chicago law school. That does not mean that they would work everywhere. In fact, one major thing to note is that many of these responses, while well-written and vivid, barely address the students’ interest in law school at all! This is something that might not work well for most graduate programs.

Wheaton College Personal Statement for Graduate School Sample 10

This successful essay for law school from a Wheaton College undergraduate does a great job tracking the student’s interest in the law in a compelling and personal way. Wheaton offers other graduate school personal statement examples, but this one offers the most persuasive case for the students’ competencies. The student accomplishes this by using clear, well-elaborated examples, showing strong and vivid writing, and highlighting positive qualities like an interest in justice and empathy without seeming grandiose or out of touch.

Wheaton College Personal Statement for Graduate School Sample 1

Based on the background information provided at the bottom of the essay, this essay was apparently successful for this applicant. However, I’ve actually included this essay because it demonstrates an extremely risky approach. While this personal statement is strikingly written and the story is very memorable, it could definitely communicate the wrong message to some admissions committees. The student’s decision not to report the drill sergeant may read incredibly poorly to some admissions committees. They may wonder if the student’s failure to report the sergeant’s violence will ultimately expose more soldiers-in-training to the same kinds of abuses. This incident perhaps reads especially poorly in light of the fact that the military has such a notable problem with violence against women being covered up and otherwise mishandled

It’s actually hard to get a complete picture of the student’s true motivations from this essay, and what we have might raise real questions about the student’s character to some admissions committees. This student took a risk and it paid off, but it could have just as easily backfired spectacularly.

Key Takeaways: Graduate School Personal Statement Examples

In this guide, we discussed why you need a personal statement and how it differs from a statement of purpose. (It’s more personal!)

We also discussed what you’ll find in a strong sample personal statement for graduate school:

• A clear narrative about the applicant and why they are qualified for graduate study.
• Specific examples to support that narrative.
• Compelling reasons why the applicant and the program are a good fit for each other.
• Strong writing, including clear organization and error-free, cliche-free language.
• Appropriate boundaries—sharing without over-sharing.

Then, we provided three strong graduate school personal statement examples for different fields, along with analysis. We did a deep-dive on the third statement.

Finally, we provided a list of other sample grad school personal statements online.

What’s Next?

Want more advice on writing a personal statement ? See our guide.

Writing a graduate school statement of purpose? See our statement of purpose samples  and a nine-step process for writing the best statement of purpose possible .

If you’re writing a graduate school CV or resume, see our how-to guide to writing a CV , a how-to guide to writing a resume , our list of sample resumes and CVs , resume and CV templates , and a special guide for writing resume objectives .

Need stellar graduate school recommendation letters ? See our guide.

See our 29 tips for successfully applying to graduate school .

Ready to improve your GRE score by 7 points?

Author: Ellen McCammon

Ellen is a public health graduate student and education expert. She has extensive experience mentoring students of all ages to reach their goals and in-depth knowledge on a variety of health topics. View all posts by Ellen McCammon

Special Education and Inclusive Learning

A Quick Guide to Completing a School Leadership Application & Personal Statement

Writing a school leadership application that will get you an interview.

Completing a school leadership personal statement and application form can be a daunting task. With time invested in preparation and attention to detail, you can increase your chances of being selected for the role. I recommend signing up to the Key for School Leaders for insights into leadership responsibilities. Investing time in purposefully clarifying why you want to apply for a school leadership position will not be wasted. If you are stuck for ideas on your achievements read through the DfE Headteachers standards and try and come up with an example of how you meet each one.

5 top tips for completing Headteacher application forms & Personal Statements:

• Follow the instructions carefully: Make sure to read the instructions and requirements for the application thoroughly and follow them closely. This includes following any formatting or word count guidelines.
• Use concrete examples: When answering questions or writing your statement, use specific examples to illustrate your points. This helps the shortlisting team better understand your skills and experiences and how they relate to the role. Were possible link the points in your personal statement with the person specification – in order.
• Proofread and edit: Make sure to proofread your application for spelling and grammar errors. Ask a friend or colleague review your application as well.
• Tailor your application to the role: Customise your application to the specific school and leadership role you are applying for. Research the school and consider how your skills and experiences align with their needs and goals. Quote their values .
• Be honest and authentic: Be genuine in your responses and don’t exaggerate or fabricate experiences. It is better to focus on a key accomplishments in depth rather than trying to cover too much ground.

Secret Tip 1: It will be the school governors/academy trustees leading on this process. Even a deputy headteacher position will have governor involvement.

Secret Tip 2: If you can find the school development plan on the website include any of your strengths or previous projects that could support this.

For more information on school leadership recruitment take a look at our post on Headteacher and SLT interview questions . We have also written about how to approach the challenge of a student panel interview.

Example Personal Statements.

Brevity and clarity are key here. Hit those person specification points within the restrictions set. Some jobs ask for 1 page of A4 for example. I suggest a maximum of 4 sides carefully spaced and formatted to ease reading. The personal statement examples below are to prompt your ideas only. The more senior the position the more detail will need adding. For each paragraph I recommend adding at least 1 example from your own experience.

Leadership Personal Statement Example 1:

As an experienced educator with a passion for inclusion, I am excited to apply for the position of Special School Headteacher. I have dedicated my career to supporting students with autism and other special educational needs, and I am committed to creating a safe and nurturing environment where all students can thrive.

Throughout my career, I have developed a deep understanding of the unique challenges faced by students with autism , including sensory sensitivities, communication difficulties , and struggles with emotional regulation . I believe that creating a safe and supportive environment is essential for helping students to succeed, and I have worked hard to develop strategies and programs that support their specific needs.

I am committed to safeguarding and have a thorough understanding of “ Keeping Children Safe in Education 2022 “. My mission has been to build a culture of vigilance and proactive measures to safeguard students from harm, abuse, and exploitation. I am committed to ensuring that all staff members are trained and equipped with the knowledge and skills to safeguard and protect our students.

I am particularly proud of my inclusive ethos , which emphasises the importance of creating an environment where all students feel valued, respected, and supported. It is essential to believe that inclusion is not just about meeting the needs of students with special educational needs, but about creating a school culture that celebrates diversity and promotes equity for all.

In my previous roles, I have developed strong budget management skills and strategic level management of large staff teams. I am confident in my ability to lead and manage a team of educators, creating a positive and supportive work environment that encourages professional growth and development.

While I have achieved many successes in my career, I recognise that there is always room for growth and improvement. That is why I value the opportunity to work with a coach to help me identify areas for development and improve my leadership skills. I believe that coaching can help me to become a more effective leader, better equipped to meet the needs of my students and staff.

Overall, I am excited about the opportunity to join your team and to continue making a positive impact in the lives of students with special educational needs. I am confident that my experience, skills, and commitment to inclusion and safeguarding make me an excellent fit for the position of Special School Headteacher. Thank you for considering my application.

Leadership Personal Statement Example 2:

As an Assistant Headteacher with 14 years of experience as a special school teacher, I am motivated to take on a leadership role in a school that aligns with my values of inclusivity and continual improvement. My commitment to teaching excellence is evidenced by positive feedback and a broad range of teaching experience with a hands-on and empathetic approach to creating a learning environment .

Throughout my career, I have been involved with continuing professional development (CPD) initiatives and have placed significant emphasis on encouraging staff to participate. I have also monitored pupil achievement and have created assessment tracking systems to improve attainment levels. Responding to budgetary demands as a middle leader, I have focused on maximising value to invest in my areas of responsibility, including communal and outside areas, to ensure an optimal learning environment.

My sensitivity to social and cultural diversity has led me to foster an open and inclusive environment that embraces my pupils’ backgrounds. I work to maintain positive dialogue with parents and to support groups such as EAL and SEN pupils. I believe that developing initiatives to address the links between social background and attainment is essential for school leadership. To achieve this I believe in making strong links with the local community .

As a leader of a large staff team, I value consultation processes and personal insights of staff members when leading a team. I am eager to involve middle leaders in initiatives aimed at improving the school’s performance. As per the DFE policy, I prioritise the safeguarding of pupils and have overseen child protection in my current role.

Leadership Personal Statement Example 3:

As an educator, I firmly believe that setting high expectations for pupils is essential to their success. In my experience, when students are challenged and held to a high standard, they rise to the occasion and achieve more than they ever thought possible. As a teacher, I strive to be an excellent practitioner by embodying this belief and consistently setting high expectations for my pupils.

One way that I have demonstrated my commitment to high expectations is through my work as a Middle Leader. Over the years, I have led both year groups and core subjects, and in both roles, I have been able to make a significant impact on the school community. Through my leadership, I have worked to ensure that my team of teachers shares my belief in high expectations, and that they are equipped with the tools and support they need to deliver challenging and engaging lessons. By working collaboratively with my team, I have been able to ensure that our pupils are consistently challenged, inspired, and motivated to achieve their very best.

Another area where I have excelled as an educator is in my approaches to curriculum implementation. I believe that every subject is essential and that every subject deserves to be championed. To this end, I have worked to ensure that my subject area is given the time, resources, and attention it deserves. By collaborating with other teachers and leaders, I have been able to share my passion for my subject and help others to see its value and importance. Through this approach, I have been able to champion my subject area effectively, ensuring that it is seen as an essential part of the school curriculum.

Being flexible and resilient are also key attributes for any successful educator. In my experience, the ability to adapt and respond to changing circumstances is essential to providing a high-quality education. Whether it’s adjusting to new teaching methods, dealing with unexpected challenges, or accommodating the diverse needs of pupils, being flexible and resilient is essential to success. I have developed these skills over time, and I am always willing to embrace change and try new approaches to teaching and learning.

Finally, I believe that a successful educator should make a contribution to the wider life of the school and community. As an educator, I am committed to going the “extra mile” for my pupils and their families, and I believe that this extends beyond the classroom. Whether it’s participating in extracurricular activities, attending school events, or volunteering in the community, I am always willing to do what it takes to support my pupils and their families.

In conclusion, as an educator, I strive to be an excellent practitioner with high expectations of my pupils. Through my work as a Middle Leader, my successful approaches to curriculum implementation, and my flexibility and resilience, I have demonstrated my commitment to providing a high-quality education. Furthermore, by making a contribution to the wider life of the school and community, I believe that I can make a positive difference in the lives of my pupils and their families. I am excited about the opportunity to continue growing and developing as an educator and to make a positive impact on the lives of my pupils.

Final Points

Remember a personal statement is – Personal to you! It is a chance to tell the panel shortlisting about yourself. If you want to gain an insight into their values try to look up the current headteacher and any governors on LinkedIn. There may be interests you have in common. The personal statement forms part of your application and may tick boxes that the interview doesn’t cover. The panel will also most likely ask questions based on what you have said in the form so be ready with examples.

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Leadership Statement

This essay about leadership statements explores how leaders across various sectors use these declarations to articulate their values, beliefs, and objectives. It examines examples from corporate CEOs, educational leaders, non-profit heads, and project managers, each tailored to reflect specific leadership qualities such as transparency, accountability, empowerment, inclusivity, and innovation. These statements not only guide personal and organizational actions but also shape the culture and influence how leaders are perceived by their teams. The essay emphasizes that crafting a personal leadership statement involves deep introspection about one’s values and the impact they wish to have, serving as a fundamental tool for guiding decision-making and inspiring others. Through these examples, the essay illustrates the importance of leadership statements in setting clear expectations and fostering an environment of trust and alignment within various organizational contexts.

How it works

A declaration of leadership, often regarded as a pivotal element in individual and professional evolution, concisely elucidates a leader’s principles, convictions, and aspirations. It serves as a guiding beacon for their conduct and choices, furnishing a lucid portrayal of their convictions and their approach to leadership. In this exposition, we delve into various instances of leadership declarations across diverse contexts, delineating their significance and the sway they can exert on a leader’s methodology and the culture of an organization.

An exemplar of an efficacious leadership declaration emanates from the realm of commerce. Let’s contemplate a CEO’s assertion: “My leadership is delineated by transparency, answerability, and a commitment to nurturing a milieu of innovation and inclusivity. I advocate for empowering my team by equipping them with the requisite tools and milieu to flourish, acknowledging their accomplishments, and fostering candid communication.” This declaration accentuates several pivotal leadership attributes such as transparency, answerability, and empowerment, establishing a distinct anticipation for the organizational ethos.

In the domain of academia, a school principal might focus differently in their leadership declaration: “I am resolute in crafting a scholastic milieu where each student feels esteemed and motivated to attain their utmost potential. My leadership prioritizes inclusiveness, excellence in pedagogy, and active collaboration with communal partners to enrich the educational journey of our students.” This assertion mirrors a commitment to inclusiveness and excellence, underlining the leader’s role in fostering an educational milieu that bolsters both students and educators.

Leaders of non-profit entities often craft declarations that mirror the mission-oriented essence of their organizations. A paradigm might be: “As the helmsman of this entity, I consecrate myself to serving our community by tackling [specific issue]. My leadership is impelled by fervor, tenacity, and a profound dedication to effectuating a quantifiable difference in the lives we impact. We strive for repercussion, rectitude, and ingenuity in all our undertakings.” This genre of declaration underscores a leader’s dedication to service and repercussion, indispensable for galvanizing volunteers and stakeholders in a non-profit milieu.

Leadership declarations also wield pivotal roles in smaller teams or project-based scenarios. A project overseer might assert: “I guide by nurturing cooperation and deference among a diverse array of team members, with a stress on resolving predicaments through inventive and sustainable resolutions. I prize each team member’s contribution and opine that triumph is attained through communal objectives and mutual bolstering.” This declaration advocates for a collaborative and deferential team ethos, pivotal for the triumph of a project.

Concocting a personal leadership declaration necessitates introspection and a lucid comprehension of one’s principles and how these manifest in leadership conduct. It entails pondering queries like: What are my foundational values as a leader? How do these values configure my conduct and decisions? What variety of milieu do I aspire to cultivate in my team or organization? The endeavor of formulating a leadership declaration not only elucidates a leader’s own aspirations and values but also communicates to others what they can anticipate from his or her leadership.

In conclusion, leadership declarations transcend beyond mere formal proclamations; they embody a leader’s fundamental values and aspired legacy. Whether steering a multinational conglomerate, a classroom, a non-profit entity, or a diminutive team, a distinct and compelling leadership declaration can steer decision-making, sway organizational ethos, and inspire those under leadership. Efficacious leadership declarations engender an atmosphere of trust and concordance, which are elemental for any prosperous leadership endeavor.

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How to Write a Personal Statement for a Scholarship + Examples

What’s covered:, what is the purpose of the scholarship personal statement, what to include in your personal statement, personal statement example: breakdown + analysis, how to make sure your writing is effective.

Either before or after you’ve gotten into your dream school, you’ll have to figure out how to pay for it. For most students, this involves a combination of financial aid, parent contributions, self-contributions, student loans, and scholarships/grants. Because scholarships are money out of someone else’s pocket that you never have to pay back, they are a great place to start!

Scholarships come in two forms: merit-based and need-based. Need-based scholarships are also often called grants. These designations tell you whether an organization looks at your financial situation when deciding about your scholarship.

Additionally, different scholarships fall under different categories based on the mission of the organization or person providing the scholarship’s financing. These missions typically emphasize different things like academic achievement, specific career goals, community service, leadership, family background, skill in the arts, or having overcome hardship. As you select scholarships to apply for and complete your applications, you should keep these missions in mind.

No matter what type of scholarship you are applying for, you will be asked to provide the review committee with standard materials. This includes your transcript, GPA, and resume/extracurriculars, but also, importantly, your personal statement. A scholarship personal statement is a bit different from your normal college essay, so we’ve put together this guide and some examples to help you get started!

The purpose of your personal statement is to help a review committee learn more about your personality, values, goals, and what makes you special. Ultimately, like with your college essays, you are trying to humanize your profile beyond your transcript, GPA, and test scores.

College essays all have one goal in mind (which is why you can apply to multiple schools at once through applications like the Common App or Coalition App): convince admissions officers that you would be a valuable addition to the university environment. The goal of your scholarship personal statement is different and differs more from one scholarship to the next. Rather than convincing various review committees that you are a generally good candidate for extra funding for college, you need to convince each review committee that your values have historically aligned with their organization’s mission and will continue to align with their organization’s mission.

Common missions amongst those who give scholarships include:

• Providing opportunities for students with career ambitions in a particular field
• Helping students who have experienced unexpected hardship
• Supporting students who show outstanding academic achievement
• Funding the arts through investing in young artists with strong technical skill
• Supporting the development of civic-minded community service leaders of the future
• Providing opportunities for historically underrepresented ethnic communities 

If a specific mission like this is outlined on an organization’s website or in the promotional material for its scholarship, the purpose of your personal statement is to show how you exemplify that mission.

Some scholarships ask for your personal statement to be guided by a prompt, while others leave things open for interpretation. When you are provided a prompt, it is obvious what you must do: answer the prompt. When you are not provided a prompt, you want to write a personal statement that is essentially a small-scale autobiography where you position yourself as a good investment. In either case, you should identify a focus or theme for what you are trying to say about yourself so that your application does not get lost in the shuffle.

Prompts include questions like:

• Why do you deserve this scholarship?
• How have you shown your commitment to (leadership/community service/diversity) in your community?
• When did you overcome adversity?
• Why is attending college important to you?

If you are provided a prompt, develop a theme for your response that showcases both your values and your achievements. This will help your essay feel focused and will subsequently help the review committee to remember which candidate you were as they deliberate.

Themes include things like:

• I deserve this community service scholarship because my compassion for intergenerational trauma has inspired me to volunteer with a local after-school program. I didn’t just sympathize. I did something about my sympathy because that’s the type of person I am. Within the program, I have identified avenues for improvement and worked alongside full-time staff to develop new strategies for increasing attendance.
• I overcame adversity when my mother had to have a major surgery two months after giving birth to my younger brother. I was just a kid but was thrown into a situation where I had to raise another kid. It was hard, but I’m the kind of person who tries to grow from hard times and, through my experience taking care of a baby, I learned the importance of listening to body language and nonverbal cues to understand the needs of others (baby and nonbaby, alike).

Without a prompt, clarity can be harder to achieve. That said, it is of the utmost importance that you find a focus. First, think about both your goals and your values.

Types of goals include:

• Career goals
• Goals for personal growth
• The type of friend you want to be
• The change you want to make in the world

Values could include:

• Authenticity
• And many more!

After you write out your goals/values, write out your achievements to see what goals/values you have “proof” of your commitment to. Your essay will ultimately be an exploration of your goal/value, what you have done about your goal/value in the past, and what you aspire to in the future.

You might be tempted to reflect on areas for improvement, but scholarships care about you living out your values. It is not enough to aspire to be exemplary in leadership, community service, or your academic field. For scholarships, you have to already be exemplary.

Finally, keep in mind that the review committee likely already has a copy of your extracurricular activities and involvement. Pick one or two accomplishments, then strive for depth, not breadth as you explore them.

My interest in the field of neuroscience began at a young age.  When I was twelve years old, my sister developed a condition called Pseudotumor Cerebri following multiple concussions during a basketball game.  It took the doctors over six months to make a proper diagnosis, followed by three years of treatment before she recovered.  During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions.  Later, my love of neuroscience was amplified when my mother began to suffer from brain-related health issues.  My mother had been a practicing attorney in Dallas for over twenty years.  She was a determined litigator who relentlessly tried difficult cases that changed people’s lives.  Now, she suffers from a cognitive impairment and is no longer able to practice law.  Oftentimes, she has headaches, she gets “cloudy,” her executive functioning slows down, she feels overwhelmed, and she forgets things.  My mother has gone from being the strong, confident, emotional and financial caretaker of our family to needing significant help on a daily basis. Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.

Due to my experiences with my mother and sister when I was in middle school, I knew that I wanted to make a difference in the field of neuroscience.  I also knew that, to obtain this goal, I needed to maintain superior grades in school while also pursuing opportunities outside of school to further my education.  In school, I was able to maintain superior grades to the point where I am currently valedictorian in a class of 567 students.  In addition, in school, I challenged myself by taking 16 Advanced Placement classes and 19 Honors classes.  Two of the most beneficial classes were AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research.  AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research are research-oriented classes where students are given the opportunity to pursue whatever track their research takes them down.  As a junior in AP Capstone Seminar, I researched the effects of harmful pesticide use on the prevalence of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) in children.  This year, as a senior in AP Capstone Research, I am learning about the effects of medical marijuana on the treatment of Multiple Sclerosis (MS).  

Outside of school, I furthered my education through taking advantage of the Duke TiP summer program. Duke TiP is a summer program run by Duke University where students who score extremely well on the SAT as middle schoolers are able to take college classes at different universities throughout the summers of their middle school and high school years.  I took advantage of this opportunity twice.  First, I went to Trinity University in San Antonio to expand my horizons and learn more about debate.  However, once I was done exploring, I decided I wanted to go into neuroscience.  This led me to take an Abnormal Psychology class at Duke University’s West Campus.  This class opened my eyes to the interaction between neuroscience and mental health, mental illness, and personality.  Years later, I am currently continuing my education outside of school as an intern at the University of Texas Dallas Center for Brain Health.  Through this internship, I have been able to see different aspects of neuroscience including brain pattern testing, virtual reality therapy, and longitudinal research studies.  With this background, I have positioned myself to be accepted by top neuroscience programs throughout the nation.  So far, I have been accepted to the neuroscience department of University of Southern California, the University of Virginia, the University of Texas, and Southern Methodist University, as well as the chemistry department at University of North Carolina–Chapel Hill.  

It is with this passion for neuroscience driven by my family and passion for education driven by internal motivation that I will set out to conquer my career objectives.  My educational aspirations consist of acquiring a bachelor’s degree in a biological or health science that would assist me in pursuing a medical career as a neuroscience researcher.  I decided to attain a career as a researcher since my passion has always been assisting others and trying to improve their quality of life.  After obtaining my Masters and my PhD, I plan to become a professor at a prestigious university and continue performing lab research on cognitive disorders.  I am particularly interested in disorders such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD).  In the lab, I hope to find different therapies and medications to help treat the 3.5 million people around the world suffering from ASD.  Furthermore, I want to contribute back to underserved populations that struggle because they do not have as much access to medical assistance as other privileged groups.  As such, I hope to do a part of my research in less developed or developing Spanish-speaking countries. This will also allow me to pursue my love of Spanish while pursuing my love of neuroscience.  I think that following such a career path will provide me the opportunity to learn about the medical needs of the autistic community and improve their quality of health.  Furthermore, I hope to train a new generation of students to strive to research and make comparable discoveries.  Whether it be through virtual reality labs or new drug discoveries, I believe that research leads to innovation which leads to a brighter future. 

This student does a great job of making themself appear competent and dedicated to the field of neuroscience. This is primarily because they provided tangible evidence of how they have pursued their dedication in the past—through their AP Capstone courses, their Abnormal Psychology class at Duke TiP, and their internship at UTD. There is no doubt in the mind of a reader that this student is high-achieving. 

This student also engages successfully with a past-future trajectory, where they end with a vision of how they will continue to use neuroscience in the future. This helps the review committee see what they are investing in and the ways that their money will go to good use.

This student has two major areas for improvement. As we have said, the purpose of a personal statement is for a student to humanize themself to a review committee. This student struggles to depict themself separately from their academic achievements. A solution to this would be for the student to establish a theme towards the beginning of their essay that relates to both their values as a human and their achievements.

At the beginning of the essay, the student explores how their interest in neuroscience began. They explain their interest through the following sentences: “During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions” and “Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.” The student made the great decision to tell the backstory of their interest, but they described their research in very mundane and redundant terms. Instead, they could have focused on their value of intellectual curiosity as a magnetic force that encouraged them to research their mother and sister’s ailments. Curiosity, then, could serve as a value-related thematic throughline to taking AP Capstone classes, taking college courses during the summer that weren’t required, and interning before even graduating high school.

A second area for improvement would be avoiding statistics. As the student identifies their valedictorian status and the number of AP classes they have taken, they might turn away certain personalities on a review committee by appearing braggy. Even further, these statistics are a waste of space. The review committee already has access to this information. These words distract from the major theme of the essay and would have been better used to humanize the student.

Throughout my academic career, I have been an avid scholar, constantly pushing myself towards ambitious goals. I held and continue to hold myself to a high standard, enrolling myself in rigorous curriculum, including Honors and Advanced Placement courses to stretch my mental potential. During my junior year of high school, I took four AP tests, two on the same day, and earned the AP Scholar with Honor Award. Additionally, I received the Letter of Commendation for the PSAT/NMSQT, and qualified for Rotary Top 100 Students both my freshman and senior year, a sign of my commitment to my studies. However, school has not been all about having the best GPA for me; beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem. I always give each class my best effort and try my hardest on every assignment. My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result. It is a major goal of mine to continue to aspire towards a high level of achievement regarding future educational and occupational endeavors; I plan on continuing this level of dedication throughout my educational career and implementing the skills I have learned and will learn into my college experience and beyond.

This fall, I will begin attending the University of California Los Angeles as an English major. I chose this major because I am fascinated by written language, especially its ability to convey powerful messages and emotions. I also enjoy delving into the works of other authors to analyze specific components of their writing to discover the meaning behind their words. In particular, I cannot wait to begin in-depth literary criticism and learn new stylistic techniques to add more depth to my writing. Furthermore, I recently went to UCLA’s Bruin Day, an event for incoming freshmen, where I was exposed to many different extracurriculars, some of which really piqued my interest. I plan on joining the Writing Success Program, where I can help students receive free writing help, and Mock Trial, where I can debate issues with peers in front of a real judge. The latter, combined with a strong writing background from my undergraduate English studies will be extremely beneficial because I plan to apply to law school after my undergraduate degree. As of now, my career goal is to become a civil rights lawyer, to stand up for those who are discriminated against and protect minority groups to proliferate equality.

As a lawyer, I wish to utilize legislation to ameliorate the plight of the millions of Americans who feel prejudice and help them receive equity in the workplace, society, and so on. Though this seems a daunting task, I feel that my work ethic and past experience will give me the jumpstart I need to establish myself as a successful lawyer and give a voice to those who are often unheard in today’s legal system. I have been a Girl Scout for over a decade and continually participate in community service for the homeless, elderly, veterans, and more. My most recent project was the Gold Award, which I conducted in the Fullerton School District. I facilitated over ten workshops where junior high students taught elementary pupils STEM principles such as density and aerodynamics via creative activities like building aluminum boats and paper airplanes. I also work at Kumon, a tutoring center, where I teach students to advance their academic success. I love my job, and helping students from local schools reach their potential fills me with much pride.

Both being a Girl Scout and working at Kumon have inspired me to help those in need, contributing significantly to my desire to become a lawyer and aid others. My extracurriculars have allowed me to gain a new perspective on both learning and teaching, and have solidified my will to help the less fortunate. In college, I hope to continue to gain knowledge and further develop my leadership skills, amassing qualities that will help me assist others. I plan to join multiple community service clubs, such as UCLA’s local outreach programs that directly aid residents of Los Angeles. I want to help my fellow pupils as well, and plan on volunteering at peer tutoring and peer editing programs on campus. After college, during my career, I want to use legal tactics to assist the underdog and take a chance on those who are often overlooked for opportunities. I wish to represent those that are scared to seek out help or cannot afford it. Rather than battling conflict with additional conflict, I want to implement peaceful but strong, efficient tactics that will help make my state, country, and eventually the world more welcoming to people of all ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds. These goals are close to my heart and therefore I will be as diligent as I am passionate about them. My perseverance and love for learning and community service drive my ambition in both education and life as a whole, and the drive to make the world a better place is one that I will carry with me for my entire life.

This student emphasizes two values in this essay: hard work and community service. These are values that go together nicely, and definitely make sense with this student’s end goal of becoming a civil rights lawyer! That said, some changes could be made to the way the student presents their values that would make their personal statement more convincing and engaging.

Structurally, instead of using a past-future trajectory, this student starts by explaining their academic achievements, then explains their career goals, then explains their history of community service, then explains their future desires for community service. This structure loses the reader. Instead, the student should have started with either the past or the future. 

This could look like 1) identifying their career goals, 2) explaining that hard work and a commitment to community service are necessary to get there, and 3) explaining that they aren’t worried because of their past commitment to hard work and community service. Or it could look like 1) providing examples of their hard work and community service in the past, then 2) explaining how those values will help them achieve their career goals.

Additionally, like with our other example, this student shows a heavy investment in statistics and spouting off accomplishments. This can be unappealing. Unfortunately, even when the student recognizes that they are doing this, writing “beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem,” they continue on to cite their achievements, writing “My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result.” They say they are going beyond the numbers, but they don’t go beyond the awards. They don’t look inward. One way to fix this would be to make community service the theme around which the essay operates, supplementing with statistics in ways that advance the image of the student as dedicated to community service.

Finally, this student would be more successful if they varied their sentence structure. While a small-scale autobiography can be good, if organized, every sentence should not begin with ‘I.’ The essay still needs to be engaging or the review committee might stop reading.

Feedback is ultimately any writer’s best source of improvement! To get your personal statement edited for free, use our Peer Review Essay Tool . With this tool, other students can tell you if your scholarship essay is effective and help you improve your essay so that you can have the best chances of gaining those extra funds!

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